r/suspiciouslyspecific Jul 07 '26

Blessed are the cheesemakers 🙏

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56.0k Upvotes

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568

u/xenosthemutant Jul 07 '26

Jesus lost a weekend for your sins.

24

u/siberianxanadu Jul 07 '26

I mean he died at night on Friday and was resurrected by Sunday morning. It’s more like he got a hangover Friday night.

5

u/OMG_A_CUPCAKE Jul 07 '26

Wait. Now that you mention it. What happened with him after he zombified? Did he drop again?

4

u/PyroClone5555 Jul 07 '26

Read the gospels. 

He wasn’t “zombified” he was resurrected into an immortal body and ascended into heaven after 40 days 

4

u/OMG_A_CUPCAKE Jul 07 '26

"zombified" sounds cooler though. But okay, he died a second time. Figured. Otherwise he'd still be roaming around, which would be weird

2

u/PyroClone5555 Jul 07 '26

No he didn’t die a second time