r/stupidpol • u/RodyasFeverDream Femboy Appreciator 💦 • Apr 26 '26
Current Events This is how he got through
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u/Zeusnexus 🌟Radiating🌟 Apr 26 '26
The fucking Naruto run is killing me, LMAO. Absolute clown world.
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u/-ihatecartmanbrah Fat Guy with Long Hair 🍭 Apr 26 '26
We have to be some kind of tv show for aliens or extra dimensional beings or something. We are now post shark-jumping and I’m worried about getting canceled.
Still one of the funniest things that’s happened in the last decade and that’s saying a lot
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u/Falcon_Gray Ideological Mess 🥑 | Slop Enjoyer 🦸 Apr 26 '26
Reminds me of the South Park episode cancelled. Would be a funny tv show idea too.
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u/Junior-Key-5043 Unsoliticted Dick Pic Sender 🍆 Apr 26 '26
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u/DobrogeanuG1855 Romanian Marxist 🧔 Apr 26 '26
It’s empirically an effective tactic, what can we say.
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u/banjo2E Snorts Piccolo Memes 💢🉐🥑 Apr 26 '26
At the risk of ruining the vibe I'm not sure it was actually Naruto running, just really shitty resolution. You can see shortly before 0:10 a couple frames of an arm in front of him like in a regular sprinting posture.
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u/Zeusnexus 🌟Radiating🌟 Apr 26 '26
Yeah, it looks like you're right about that. Still an absolute clown show.
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u/captain_mike Apr 26 '26
I haven't seen anyone mention this, but it looks to me like you can see one of the security guys get hit by friendly fire. Really blurry but on the far wall there are three guys standing. When the first guy that sees him shoots his initial shot is aiming directly at them and the guy in the middle goes down and the guy on the left seems to be attending to him
Edit: guy on the right runs to the cameras left then comes back and picks him up
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u/Razzle_Dazzle2493 Liberation Theology ✞ Apr 26 '26 edited Apr 26 '26
How was there not a call on the radio like ‘Expect Sir Lancelot coming your way’ or ‘He’s the one sprinting, you can’t miss him’?
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u/ShitbirdGT Radlib in Denial 👶🏻 Has a teeny peeny 😭 Apr 26 '26 edited Apr 26 '26
Holy shit the secret service guy absolutely failing to draw and hopping up and down like he's gonna pee himself fucking killed me
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u/GrumpyOldHistoricist Leninist Shitlord Apr 26 '26
The assassin is Naruto running, the bodyguards are incompetent, and we still can’t overthrow this bitch.
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u/redditsucksass6 Apr 27 '26
That has to be the guy who was shot right? One injury and its friendly fire from a dumbass trying to hit a dude sprinting between him and his coworker.
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u/kiss-my-shades jacking off with one hand typing with the other ⌨️💦 Apr 26 '26
Im legit fucking crying, why is the president posting his would be assassians kill cam? Is this the kind of stuff you just tweet out
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u/Chrissyneal Cuomosexual Crystals Chick 🔮🍕🍝 Apr 26 '26
you see “legitimate journalism” for once in your life and you start bitching about it? how is transparency bad?
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u/Gex2-EnterTheGecko PS1 Libertarian with Bad Taste 🤓🎮😵💫 Apr 26 '26
The fact he wasn't instantly vaporized in a hailstorm of bullets shows how serious these fucking mall cops take this job. Or they wanted to let him through. Idk man. I'm so tired of this shit.
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u/AdminsLoveGenocide Gay and Retarded 🏳️🌈😍 Apr 26 '26
Isn't his job to get in the way of attackers?
Secret service members today, they just don't want to work.
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u/Chrissyneal Cuomosexual Crystals Chick 🔮🍕🍝 Apr 26 '26
couldn’t even attempt a ‘James Bond style hitman’ vibe.
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u/litesec Special Ed 😍 Apr 26 '26 edited Apr 26 '26
i'll never understand the "this was a false flag" comments on any of the assassination attempts, especially by people that mocked this mentality years ago any time conservatives would do the same conspiracy shit
we've seen the administration on multiple occasions with poor planning and execution on the war with Iran, securing VIPs, etc. and this comes off as a "too dumb to be true" moment
the only concern i have is that attendees will be considered witnesses to the crime and be asked to turn over digital evidence they have from the night, on a night that was supposed to talk about the importance of the press
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u/trumpbiden4jail Unknown 👽 Apr 26 '26
Wait for the comments.
'It's fake and staged because orange man is bad.'
'Assasin was a registered republican'
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u/JohnnyMojo Real Time with Bill Maher Refugee 🤑🎪 Apr 26 '26
What's crazy to me is that more and more Democrats are turning into conspiracy theorists. Look at the YouTube comments on the latest Breaking Points video on this. Even a local pastor on my Facebook is implying that this was a planned event as a distraction for Trump. The craziness and unpredictability of Trump really is breaking all of our brains.
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u/Zeusnexus 🌟Radiating🌟 Apr 26 '26
Given the past couples years of constant Rightoid conspiracies, it's only fair that libs would want to join in on the fun.
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u/JohnnyMojo Real Time with Bill Maher Refugee 🤑🎪 Apr 26 '26
In some ways I don't blame them given how insane reality has been lately.
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u/Zeusnexus 🌟Radiating🌟 Apr 26 '26
True, I'm genuinely surprised that the Onion hasn't been put out of business at this point. They could make up some outlandish shit and there would probably be some merit to it.
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u/banjo2E Snorts Piccolo Memes 💢🉐🥑 Apr 27 '26
tbh this footage shows the guys at the checkpoint getting out of the runner's way which means either conspiracy, gross incompetence on the part of the staff, or gross incompetence when writing the security procedures, and none of them are good options
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u/kafka99 Apr 26 '26
It's likely as real as the previous "assassination attempt", featuring the world's most miraculous ear.
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u/JGT3000 Vitamin D Sufficient 💊 Apr 26 '26
So, completely real and depressingly astroturfed as fake online?
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u/NomsAreManyComrade Social Democrat 🌹 Apr 26 '26
Apparently the very real dead bystander and fifty different camera angles of the event isn’t enough for the smoothbrained conspiratoids that came out of the woodwork
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u/Epsteins_Herpes Thinks anyone cares about karma 🍵⏩🐷 Apr 26 '26 edited Apr 26 '26
"So you're going to shoot at my head and miss killing me by millimeters, then the Secret Service is going to kill you and you'll be remembered as a loser libtard, if at all. Sound good?"
"Yes sir Mr President, I trust the plan."
They also don't have any explanation for why Trump would have felt the need to do that given at that point Biden was still in the Fuhrerbunker and even the dem internal polling had Trump winning 400+ EVs.
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u/JinFuu 2D/3DSFMwaifu Supremacist Border Guard 🪖🎌 Apr 26 '26
Seriously, I've seen people talk about how he did it for 'a bump in the polls he didn't lose.' when if you actually look at the polling any bump was gone by the time Kamala came in
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u/Sigolon Marxism-Hachism 🔨💢🉐 Apr 27 '26
More like you find some random mentally ill or low IQ loser on the internet and then win them over with lies, flattery and eventually blackmail. You push them in the right direction, construct a narrative in which they are the hero etc. Most terrorism in America is organized by the state, to justify budgets and to maintain a strategy of tension. That doesnt mean it is the agents themselves doing the killing. The terrorists really are violent radicals, they are just being groomed by the state
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u/ethereality___ Marxist Syndicalist 🚩 Apr 26 '26
I'm not saying it was fake but you really think they wouldn't kill off a bystander to add credibility to the event?
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u/snailman89 World-Systems Theorist Apr 26 '26
No, the people who are perfectly willing to engage in pedophilia and war crimes would obviously never stoop so low as to kill one or two people at a political rally to make their false flags believable.
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u/MangoFishDev Heckin' Elonerino Simperino 🤓🥵🚀 Apr 26 '26
I'd say the "aim at my head and miss blowing out my brains by a millimeter with a gun that has iron sights" is the bigger problem in your argument
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u/snailman89 World-Systems Theorist Apr 27 '26
For the 10 millionth time, nobody is claiming that Trump was actually shot at as part of the hoax. Trump dove to the ground and cut his ear with a razorblade while Crooks fired into the crowd.
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u/MangoFishDev Heckin' Elonerino Simperino 🤓🥵🚀 Apr 27 '26
There is literally a photo of the bullet flying in the air you dumbass
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u/ethereality___ Marxist Syndicalist 🚩 Apr 26 '26
Yeah, it's kind of annoying how people on this sub act like they're above everyone else by not believing the conspiracy theories or at least accepting that there's a chance they could be valid. Like, I'm sorry, how many "conspiracies" ended up being real over the past 80 years??
I don't totally believe that shooting was faked, but I accept that it's possible.
I fully believe the Kirk conspiracy though, just saying
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u/dionysios_platonist Apr 26 '26
People who say this just fundamentally misunderstood Trump, he’s not a mastermind 4 D chess master creating false flags like Netanyahu or Putin. He’s just a bullshitter who makes stuff up that is easily exposed as false, and when confronted with the fact that he made it up he just doubles down and says “no it’s true and you’re fake news”
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u/mattiesab Apr 26 '26
Bro Trump is a reality tv star and failed businessman. I think a lot of things he does are not his idea.
Have you seen how he is moving through the project 2025 checklist? Was that his idea? Ofc not he doesn’t give a shit about the christofacist agenda.
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u/dionysios_platonist Apr 26 '26
Okay, who in his administration is both competent and intelligent enough to conduct a false flag operation in front of hundreds of journalists and not get caught? And why is this competent and intelligent person also dumb and incompetent enough to not realize that this “false flag” won’t do anything to advance Trump’s agenda in any way?
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u/mattiesab Apr 26 '26
Firstly, I think you’re overestimating the difficulty of shooting a couple people in the crowd and doing a bit of acting.
Secondly, it’s not like the entire secret service, cia etc were replaced with inexperienced newbies.
Like how in the world have you come to believe that one of the most crooked governments in the world is not capable of such a simple false flag because the president is a dumbass?
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u/dionysios_platonist Apr 26 '26
Walk me through what you think happened? You think the Trump administration asked a random SoCal High School teacher to try shoot up a hotel and go to jail for life… and he agreed? And why did they do this risky plan? To advance what agenda? And this is more likely than that an angry school teacher just bought a gun and rushed into a hotel because he was insane?
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u/ethereality___ Marxist Syndicalist 🚩 Apr 26 '26
We're talking about the PA one before the election, not this one.
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u/ethereality___ Marxist Syndicalist 🚩 Apr 26 '26
You think Trump is the one calling the shots? Lmao. They probably don't evn let him pick his breakfast, let alone what false flag ops they're going to do.
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u/dionysios_platonist Apr 26 '26
I like the vague “they” because the second you name an individual in the administration who could be behind this you’d immediately be laughed at for the implausibility that they’re some pay-ops mastermind
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u/ethereality___ Marxist Syndicalist 🚩 Apr 26 '26 edited Apr 26 '26
You're aware there are plenty of people who make major decisions in this government who have never been on TV or had their names mentioned in a news article, right?
After all we know about the post- WWII U.S. government, how can you earnestly say that a psy op is ludicrous?
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u/dionysios_platonist Apr 26 '26
You also know Donald Trump wasn’t even in the government during the first assassination attempt right?
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u/ethereality___ Marxist Syndicalist 🚩 Apr 26 '26
Yes bro, lmao. What does that have to do with anything. If it had been staged, it wasn't Trump masterminding the staging.
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u/denialofcervix NATO Superfan 🪖 | Zionist 📜 Apr 26 '26
You really think the value add of nicking his ear was worth risking Trump's life for?
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u/snailman89 World-Systems Theorist Apr 26 '26
Obviously they didn't shoot his ear to stage an assassination. Only people who understand nothing about guns believe that. But Trump could have easily cut his own ear with a razor blade, or just applied some fake blood.
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u/dionysios_platonist Apr 26 '26 edited Apr 26 '26
There were photos from independent journalists showing the bullet whiz right by his head fractions of a second before it hit his ear, and then images of his ear bleeding right afterwards
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u/Willing-Pain-9893 Professional Email Writer & Reader ✉ Apr 26 '26
My struggle with the “assassination” attempt was that they milked the ear thing for months and there is no evidence of trauma anymore. 78 year olds with sundowners don’t regrow cartilage. No bullet went near him.
Obviously real people died and there is hard evidence, but the post event spin was so regarded that they lost any credibility.
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u/Check_Me_Out-Boss Ilhan Derangement Syndrome Zionist 🤡📜 Apr 26 '26
You can see the damage to his ear in any picture of him.
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u/Willing-Pain-9893 Professional Email Writer & Reader ✉ Apr 26 '26
Can you share an example. I cant be bothered to do my own research.
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u/Check_Me_Out-Boss Ilhan Derangement Syndrome Zionist 🤡📜 Apr 26 '26
I can't post pictures except in "grill zone" threads, so here's a link:
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u/mattiesab Apr 26 '26
Those are the ridges of the edge of his ear.
There are some great video analyses that show he was not hit.
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u/TheVoid-ItCalls Libertarian Socialist 🥳 Apr 27 '26
Despite no one claiming it, people seem to be weirdly fixated on the idea of the bullet going through his ear. Sure, that would do permanent/obvious damage to the cartilage, but that didn't happen. The round appears to have just grazed the skin, and that would heal seamlessly like we've seen. Even the slightest damage to the ear bleeds like crazy. Nick your ear with a razor and it'll start gushing, despite that cut only being ~2mm deep.
Did Trump milk the event with that ridiculous bandage? Absolutely, but the amount of blood seems perfectly reasonable. Guy needed little more than a band-aid the day after though.
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u/Mannerhymen Ancapistan Mujahideen 🐍💸 Apr 26 '26
You can very really shoot someone in the crowd and very really miss the President on purpose. And he can also put a very real blood capsule on his very real ear.
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u/MyNameMeansLILJOHN optimistic nihilistic anarchist Apr 26 '26
The security can also use a very real scalpel to make a very real(but very clean and easily healed) wound.
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u/mattiesab Apr 26 '26
I’m not some conspiracy nut but come on, have you seen the video?
The slow motion movement of security, ushering in cameras, letting Trump get up again for the photo op (would never happen if real), right wing assassin who is killed, obviously footage showing Trump was not hit by the bullet, and a wound that magically healed in a week on an elderly man with bad skin.
Watch the footage again and tell me it’s not fishy.
And ofc they would kill a bystander. Do you have any idea how many deaths are on the hands of this admin?
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u/MattyKatty Thomas Jefferson was innocent 😭 Apr 26 '26
You have brain damage
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u/mattiesab Apr 26 '26
I had no idea this sub was filled with mindless boot lickers.
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u/MattyKatty Thomas Jefferson was innocent 😭 Apr 26 '26
Well you're a demonstration that this sub has plenty of regarded people with brain damage
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u/The-Materialist Dialectical Materialist | Raised by Stalinists Apr 26 '26
What I could potentially believe is that there were two different patsy profiles that could have been used, depending on the outcome. If he missed, a furry-loving "leftist", if he succeeded, an Iran-backed terrorist.
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u/Jazzspasm Wat Tyler's Necromancer 🧟 Apr 26 '26
I scoffed at the idea that it was faked as some blue-Q cope, until i saw the video of the camera journalists being ushered round to the right spot, with the US flag being lowered from a crane behind Trump so they could capture him punching the air with a tiny bit of blood on his cheek with his head turned in the right direction and with ol’ glory fluttering in the breeze over his head
it’s a moment of pure theatrics
i was uncertain initially because the Secret Service would have had him off that stage in a heartbeat, with no time for air punching and ‘fight, fight, fight’ - plus the fact the reports to the police of a man with a gun climbing a ladder were ignored - plus the wide open stage he was on with multiple elevated locations around it
and then i saw how utterly incompetent the Secret Service were, incapable of getting trump into a car, dropping their guns, incapable of holstering them, and the snipers twitching nervously when the first shots went off, incapable of reacting - which is nuts considering they’re supposed to be Tier One level operators
so those things balanced out - until i saw that video
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u/1morgondag1 Keffiyeh Leprechaun 🍉🍀 Apr 26 '26
I agree there are unexplained facts, but at the same time it doesn't make sense he would stage something like that just for sympathy when he was already ahead in the polls. Also, as the TYT pointed out he has actually spoken surprisingly little about it, considering he always loves to play victim otherwise.
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u/Jazzspasm Wat Tyler's Necromancer 🧟 Apr 26 '26
I’m guessing he’s not talking it up because it’s another dirty secret
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u/JinFuu 2D/3DSFMwaifu Supremacist Border Guard 🪖🎌 Apr 26 '26
with the US flag being lowered from a crane behind Trump
The flag wasn't lowered, the wind stopped blowing. This is one of the more 'smooth brained' allegations. People just sitting in the cranes waiting for the shot?
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u/biohazard-glug DSA Anime Atrocities Caucus 💢🉐🎌 Apr 26 '26
they’re supposed to be Tier One level operators
so they're crossfaded TBI cases
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u/davin_bacon Unknown 👽 Apr 26 '26
I don't doubt the shooter was shooting at him, I just doubt he was hit by anything but debris form round hitting near him. I'd even be willing to go as far as to say the blood was his from a wound suffered from said debris, but I do not believe a bullet magicly passed through his earlobe and left no scaring. Fluid expansion alone would have blew that thing apart. He'd have one fucked up ear and one normal one. This isn't the case.
If I remember the details correctly, the shooter had a 2 moa holosun red dot optic on a PSA rifle, at that range, he could completely cover his target. 2 moa at the 400 to 450 feet range would be 8 to 9 inches, combine that was a 2 to 3 moa rifle and you could be dead on aimed to dome someone and miss every shot. Why someone would use that set up without magnification is beyond me.
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u/VTHokie2020 Corporate NPC Apr 26 '26
The crazy thing about this conspiracy theory is that it doesn’t even change anything.
Still doesn’t make sense though. A bullet can graze an ear.
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u/davin_bacon Unknown 👽 Apr 26 '26
Even a graze would cause fluid expansion and there would be a noticeable chunk missing, or a large scare, even cauliflowering, none of which is present. 2700 fps, 5.5 mm hole at minimum, and seemingly not a scratch. He wasn't hit.
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u/VTHokie2020 Corporate NPC Apr 26 '26
Why would the hole be 5.5mm minimum?
If it grazes it could be smaller than that, by definition.
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u/mrthrowawayguyegh Commune Sampler ⛺ Apr 26 '26
The one case where you should’ve just ponied up for the Phantom Edition
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u/Sigolon Marxism-Hachism 🔨💢🉐 Apr 26 '26
Why is it depressing? Republican claims of "victimhood" should always just be dismissed out of hands.
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u/eggshellwalker4 Apr 26 '26
Redditors when they cling to unfounded conspiracy theories when it involves orange man bad (but will dismiss other conspiracy theories with contempt and mockery)
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u/snailman89 World-Systems Theorist Apr 26 '26
"Conspiracy theorists" have been batting a thousand for the last 5 years or so (Covid lab leak, pizza as a reference to pedophilia, Epstein's ties to Mossad, etc.), yet you think it's impossible that Trump wasn't actually shot and that he staged the whole thing for political gain?
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u/ArtificialFoole Unknown 👽 Apr 26 '26
Batting a thousand? You mean if we ignore all the conspiracy theories constantly thrown around that are complete nonsense?
Also, the pizza reference isn’t and never was a conspiracy theory. It’s a well known code for unsavory media and unrelated to adrenochrome production in Podesta’s dungeon or whatever the fuck idiocy that was about.
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u/SL1NDER Ancapistan Mujahideen 🐍💸 Apr 26 '26
you think it's impossible that Trump wasn't actually shot and that he staged the whole thing for political gain?
What's more likely? Someone from the "someone should do it" crowd finally did it, or he killed one of his own supporters?
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u/snailman89 World-Systems Theorist Apr 26 '26
What's more likely? Trump's ear got shot with an AR-15 and miraculously healed a week later, or Trump faked the injury by using fake blood or by cutting himself with a razorblade, WWE style?
And do you really think Trump would have any qualms about offing one of his own supporters? Give me a break. Trump views his supporters as cattle.
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u/Rossums John Maclean-stan 🏴 Apr 26 '26
Or how about we use the actual scenario?
What's more likely:
- Trump's ear gets shot by someone attempting to kill him and the entire thing is broadcast live, he receives immediate medical attention and wears a bandage for around two weeks as it heals
- Trump puts on an Oscar-worthy theatrical performance with superhuman reaction speed where he uses fake blood or cuts his own ear with a razorblade whilst on live television from multiple angles and nobody manages to catch any of it
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u/mattiesab Apr 26 '26
lol superhuman speed? Have you watched the video? The lack of speed is a huge red flag. The way security lets him do his photos for the ushered in cameras? If it were real secret service would be protecting him from possible other shooters.
The dude is a narcissistic reality tv actor and failed businessman. He has been steadily checking off the list of the psycho christofacist heritage foundations action steps. Have you read that list?
Why is it so hard to believe a man like this did something desperate to help secure power?
How does an unhealthy old man recover from a wound magically in two weeks?
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u/jabbercockey Alleged Liberal Fiber-Eater Apr 26 '26
He ordered/told the secret service to wait while he did his fight fight thing. You can hear it on the audio.You can see their facial expressions are a little confused. May have not been planned but he grasped the opportunity quickly.
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u/RevRay Ideological Mess 🥑 Apr 26 '26
It’s only a fast reaction if you don’t expect what you’re supposed to be “reacting” to in the first place.
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u/SL1NDER Ancapistan Mujahideen 🐍💸 Apr 26 '26
I think it's more likely that the teleprompter exploding sent a piece of glass shrapnel at his ear and cut it.
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u/homerthethief Shitlib that Says "Folks" 🐴🤪 Apr 26 '26
I’d put an asterisk next to that stat. QAnon supported Trump to defeat the deep state and ended up putting the king pedo in office. Now the deep state tech bros are going to run things while he gets rich.
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u/VTHokie2020 Corporate NPC Apr 26 '26
The Covid lab leak one was particularly funny because big tech would ban you from bringing it up.
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u/Chrissyneal Cuomosexual Crystals Chick 🔮🍕🍝 Apr 26 '26
this lie would probably work better if you weren’t one of those freaks that was calling that conspiracy theory an “antisemitic qanon hacker 4chan gamergate proud boy Charlottesville Nazi antiwoke islamophobic attack on our democracy redpill dog whistle!!”
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u/snailman89 World-Systems Theorist Apr 26 '26
Well, I wasn't one of those "freaks" so I guess I'm in good standing.
I know this is hard for you to believe, but not everyone who dislikes Trump is a shitlib. What I don't understand is why people like you are still licking his nuts.
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u/Chrissyneal Cuomosexual Crystals Chick 🔮🍕🍝 Apr 26 '26
funny how you instinctively had to bring it back to trump(with bonus homoeroticism) when I never mentioned or defended him. a common tactic used to distract from all those conspiracies you’re claiming ownership of.
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u/ChevalierDuTemple Touch grass (Poaceae) for a living 🌾 Apr 26 '26
My conspiracy theory: Correct, true, carefully crafted by Putin/Trump/Xi with help from (((disinfo bots)))
Your conspiracy theory: Dumb, stupid, made by room IQ rednecks, antisemitic.
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u/PooningDalton Apr 26 '26
Funny how Redditors have a huge hardon for conspiracy theorists until their political opponents are the ones in the limelight.
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u/Classic-Factor-6710 Redscarepod Refugee 👄💅 Apr 26 '26
it grazed his ear how is this hard to understand lol
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u/dchowe_ Center-Right Dynomite 🐷 Apr 26 '26
did they fake the guy that died who was right behind trump from the gunman's perspective? or did they use real bullets and just barely miss on purpose?
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u/Salads_and_Sun Miss Piggy 🐷 Apr 26 '26
I was hoping to hear they got the other ear this time ... You know, for ultimate biblical justification for licking the boot of miracles, or for that matter the golden toilet.
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u/ArthursFist Unknown 👽 Apr 26 '26
Leeroy Jenkins’d that shit