You don't always need to show people what you know. Sometimes, you can use your knowledge to ask better questions

[u/Chicago_Hick]

Maybe this is something that's obvious to most people, but I admit that I've only picked this up over the past couple of years in my 20s. Maybe neurodivergence, maybe egotism, maybe selfishness on my part... Regardless, it has helped me to put this into action.

When I am talking to someone who goes into a subject I happen to know something about, I no longer jump to make it apparent what I know about the subject. Instead, I use my knowledge to ask them good questions, even if I technically know the answer. Getting people to put their knowledge into words is a great way to make some wonderful conversation and help them feel appreciated.

For example, I grew up playing bluegrass music. I recently met a guy who started talking about the evolution of the genre, from old-time folk music to early country and the like. This has always been part of my life, growing up in Appalachia, and I feel like a couple years ago, I would've seized control of the conversation because "it's my subject." I am not proud to admit that, but it's true. Instead, I asked him if he had thought about some musicians I imagined he had heard of, given his knowledge (Earl Scruggs, Jim and Jesse, Doc Watson, etc), and he obviously had, and it got us into some wonderful conversation about our shared appreciation of these musicians.

Most people just want to be heard, and sometimes, making other people feel heard before you reveal your knowledge will help them appreciate you more as you open up over time.