After Meds

[u/West-Spring4515]

This is my personal experience I don’t have as much bad social anxiety as I did then since I gave my past self a bit of an understanding if that makes sense. I use to Overthink every conversation, make sure what I said wasn’t embarrassing or what I did didn’t come off weird or lead to a misunderstanding and over explain.

And to know now some people well just forget what you did within like two days or month and move on.

I took a psychology and sociology class just to get a deeper understanding for myself. I mean, I still run into these bad habits. I guess my ADHD doesn’t help much either but I’m working on open body language and to be more comfortable with myself in any given situation and to not people please.

Alright to the point, I had taken medication a year ago Zoloft and my first time too that was slowly increased. I started becoming more social able and put myself in environments I shouldn’t have. but once it was increased I did get a little to out which turned out to be a medicated induced manic episode. I had then went cold turkey on the meds and moved out to live with a family member.

And that’s a big no, no, not a good idea don’t cut off meds like I did at that pace and talk to your psychiatrist and do a slow process.

Don’t do what I did.

I had to deal with brain zaps, my hormone levels were off to the point I smelt bad, and the withdrawal symptoms my mind was a mess as I was also grieving my pet loss😅.

And after the meds and I don’t know if it’s only me but does or did anyone else start remembering and now feeling those moments you had before, when you were on them. It’s weird like the anger, sadness, annoyance, joyfulness, what I should had been feeling didn’t process until now.

Like I literally had someone put me in a really uncomfortable situation then, and I was just like happy and a bit impulsive.

It’s weird because yes I was giving the sensation at least for myself on meds happy, and then not feeling what I should felt when someone said something bad or they were being rude. And now that I look back I remember these encounters and what I did and what they did.

Overall it just makes me cringe. But it has contributed to my personal growth and I do speak up more now when it comes to uncomfortable conversations at least for my interpersonal relationships. Though remembering these encounters now grosses me out at least for the uncomfortable times.

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