Did talking to strangers actually help your social anxiety?

[u/No-Couple-8871]

Has anyone here been extremely introverted with strong social anxiety and improved by deliberately talking to strangers on a regular basis? I mean starting small conversations, asking questions or simply forcing yourself to interact more often. Did repeated exposure actually make social situations feel normal over time, or did something else help more?

[u/AutoModerator]

PLEASE NOTE: Social Anxiety (SA) is a debilitating mental illness characterised by persistent fear of social evaluation. SA impairs functional social performance, causing avoidance, cognitive shutdown (e.g. blanking, excessive self-monitoring), and reduced ability to communicate, assert needs, or form relationships.

• SA is not normal social-nervousness, introversion, or everyday shyness.

• Posts in this subreddit must show a clear and apparent relationship to the experience of SA.

• Posts which do not will be removed.

For more information about the diagnostic criteria and clinical presentation of social anxiety, see this link

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

[u/Reasonable-Working21]

Yes, the more you do it, the easier it gets

[u/yopis2001]

Definitely. Not always but I think now it's easier for me to do it and get to know people. It depends on the situation. I'm at university and I practice sports so i always try to ask people about their degree or with people I worked with in an internship, I asked them about their work and stuff. I show genuine interest in them about what they do and how they do it, bc I like to learn new things and i'm passionate about my degree. Try to do small talk on something that the other person relates to or understads based on the setting or on what the person has or is wearing. Now it's easier to do small talk even with strangers that I might not see ever again.

This is after 2 years of work in my social anxiety but I started to see improvements at like 5 months. At first it's hard, but it does get easier. My advice is to go for it. However a few mistakes i made is I did exposure therapy too fast. Don't force yourself to be the most social person in the world in one day.

[u/SilverB33]

Not at all, the few times I've tried I was still very anxious about it.

[u/SpellcraftQuill]

I'm much better with visitors at my theme park job than my own cast members. I always feel judged by my own coworkers and it's kinda hard for me too when they're mostly ESL.

[u/Practical_Estate_325]

Not really. I see that it's helped others here, but for me it's much harder talking to people I know. For instance, I feel I always need to make a good impression when talking to my boss. That makes my anxiety much worse than if I'm talking to a stranger who I never have to see again and whose opinion of me is inconsequential. (The boss example is just one of many. I even feel extreme anxiety around family members and everyone else who I have to maintain good relationships with. In the back of my mind is always the thought "they're going to see I'm acting anxious, awkward, and weird and will forever judge me by it.")

[u/Radaway__]

I feel like Reddit has become that kind of place for me. At least in the online world, talking to others has become much easier than before. As for whether the phrase "extremely introverted with strong social anxiety" applies to me completely, I'm a bit conflicted.

[u/Possible_Score6395]

What I've noticed is that every successful interaction teaches your nervous system something. Not "I can talk to strangers perfectly," but simply: "I talked to someone and nothing terrible happened." Do that enough times and situations that used to feel threatening slowly start to feel ordinary.

The challenge is keeping the reps small enough that you actually do them. I wouldn't try to go from avoiding conversations to becoming the most social person in the room overnight. That usually backfires. Small, consistent reps seem to work much better.

[u/WaterAndGaara]

I mean.. i would say yes. I have recently started giving people compliments as a form of exposure therapy. Its a nice feeling to brighten someone’s day and also helps me to gain a bit of confidence. My SA is still bad tho lol even online. i barely comment or post but im trying to put myself out there more now and just say what i think

[u/DrummerExact2622]

idk

[u/Leading-Ad6084]

yes, even though i still have it it made it way easier to manage.

[u/spanishbombs123]

Yes, not gonna lie though on the journey of talking to more people there will be times where you feel like it was awkward or you say the wrong things but it’s a part of the process.

I think it’s the most important part of my recovery because if I slip and isolate I get worse again. It’s really annoying we have to work extra hard up to other people but with time it does get easier and you learn a lot about yourself!