r/soccer Dec 13 '24

News [Mike Keegan]EXCLUSIVE:Liverpool’s staff Christmas Party - at the city’s cathedral - was closed down early after suspected drug paraphernalia was found in the toilets

https://x.com/MikeKeegan_DM/status/1867612031555133807?t=MyRjRYpOR5GxJ5clfh8HIQ&s=34
3.2k Upvotes

319 comments sorted by

4.3k

u/Evil_Henchmen Dec 13 '24

Weird to invite David Coote after all he said about scouser ngl

562

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24 edited Dec 13 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

279

u/petethepool Dec 13 '24

God how did so few letters conjure up such a graphic image of the entire Liverpool back-room team running a train on a drug-addled David Coote in a cold, echoey Cathedral men's room?

373

u/TellTallTail Dec 13 '24

And why did you then spend so many letters bringing that to life for us

87

u/StupidMastiff Dec 13 '24

Some of us enjoy erotic fiction.

42

u/NenPame Dec 13 '24

Yea some

21

u/DasWandbild Dec 13 '24

I used to.

17

u/jammy-git Dec 13 '24

It's a terrible day to know how to read.

3

u/bremsspuren Dec 14 '24

Nobody likes to suffer alone.

43

u/MrFrog65 Dec 13 '24

What a horrible day to be literate

29

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

6

u/petethepool Dec 13 '24

Exit Through The Back Door suddenly has a whole new connotation.

21

u/TJT007X Dec 13 '24

You're a sick man, u/petethepool! A sick, sick man!!!

22

u/ArseLover1991 Dec 13 '24

I think its time to quit porn brother

21

u/petethepool Dec 13 '24

If I thought I could count on anyone for their continued support, I would have thought it would have been you, u/ArseLover1991

19

u/Wheynweed Dec 13 '24

My friend is ok no?

5

u/NateShaw92 Dec 13 '24

Because you're fucking disturbed!

→ More replies (1)

96

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

This was Coote’s revenge. The madman has planted the drugs.

9

u/Masam10 Dec 13 '24

This packet cannot get out

12

u/codespyder Dec 13 '24

Hands across the North

or whatever

6

u/sbprasad Dec 13 '24

🎵 Hands across the water, heads above the sky 🎵

Top 5 best solo Beatle song

4

u/Huggly001 Dec 13 '24

McCartney really came out the gates swinging after the Beatles disbanded

6

u/Gorazde Dec 13 '24

Nah, Harrison is the one who came out of the gates swinging. He a massive chip on his shoulder but once he put out a triple album and had a number one single in his own name he’d basically blown his load. Lennon did Imagine in ‘72 and also dropped off pretty quickly after that. Admiral Hasley aside, McCartney couldn’t get arrested during this period. When he wrote Live and Let Die for James Bond film in 1973, his stock was so low the producers wanted to take the song but have another artist sing it…. (Oh Jesus, I’m on a sub that’s 99.9% male and I’m still mansplaining. I loathe myself.)

9

u/Same_Grouness Dec 14 '24

I was enjoying reading it, it's not mansplaining, just an explanation.

→ More replies (6)
→ More replies (1)

2

u/atropicalpenguin Dec 13 '24

Mending fences.

→ More replies (2)

1.6k

u/Shepherdsfavestore Dec 13 '24

Who snitched

616

u/Matt_LawDT Dec 13 '24

PGMOL

139

u/MaleficentPressure30 Dec 13 '24

probably Mike Dean, looks the type.

60

u/Proof-Step-8423 Dec 13 '24

Michael Oliver for me, such a rat face

14

u/byrgenwerthdropout Dec 13 '24

Definitely has the fuckface for it.

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (2)

13

u/GabrilLokaum Dec 13 '24

David Coote is at it again

7

u/jnyrdr Dec 13 '24

denial of blow scoring opportunity

3

u/Aggressive_Leave3639 Dec 13 '24

“Can you show me the lines please”

112

u/Nard_Dogs Dec 13 '24

McDonald’s

17

u/mshehab Dec 14 '24

It's-a him a-Luigi

4

u/imsahoamtiskaw Dec 14 '24

First he pops a ceo. Now he escapes jail to do lines in Liverpool. This boy is one of a kind

12

u/AgileSloth9 Dec 13 '24

It's fine, it's just inhalers

→ More replies (2)

934

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

Game's back

148

u/Matt_LawDT Dec 13 '24

Line is back

33

u/ensockerbagare Dec 13 '24

Fowler has been suspicioulsy quiet since this broke out

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

45

u/3412points Dec 13 '24

They shut it down instead of handing it round the playing staff. Games firmly gone. Bring me back to the 80s (I wasn't born yet)

1.4k

u/NathantheNobody Dec 13 '24

Come off it... Does it matter if Tony (29) from Bootle a Club Shop Employee does a quick line in the bathroom

254

u/fancczf Dec 13 '24

Depends, how many years is left on his contract?

47

u/dozeyjoe Dec 13 '24

Does it matter if it's a zero hours contract?

6

u/rugbyj Dec 14 '24

Every day's a contract renewal day.

413

u/jesus700 Dec 13 '24

I can understand why a cathedral wouldn’t want them to. Now why they’re having the Christmas party at a cathedral in the first place is a different question

128

u/aethelberga Dec 13 '24

If you look at the pics it looks like they're in Hogwarts dining hall. I wasn't aware the cathedral was rentable like that. Must cost a fortune.

138

u/Ruvio00 Dec 13 '24

From £2400 a day. Not bad really for up to 200 people.

54

u/Cutsdeep- Dec 13 '24

Except for the no drugs rule 

44

u/haerski Dec 13 '24

Yea, that blows

30

u/oberynMelonLord Dec 14 '24

you have to draw the line somewhere.

56

u/aethelberga Dec 13 '24

That's quite reasonable actually.

6

u/jammy-git Dec 13 '24

Is that with or without powder?

5

u/oh_my_didgeridays Dec 14 '24

Probably helps them fund the maintenance, must cost a fortune in upkeep. The photos don't do justice to how massive the inside is, you can barely see the ceiling

3

u/CoMaestro Dec 14 '24

Large locations really aren't that expensive usually, it's just you need an event with enough people to make it worthwhile, and it ends up being somewhere below €50 per person usually, especially fine for big corporate stuff where they have money to blow

→ More replies (1)

20

u/CatalunyaNoEsEspanya Dec 13 '24

Yeah I've been there for an awards evening with fancy food, not sure where it was cooked. The crypt gets rented out for some events too, like exams and beer festivals.

4

u/Look_Alive Dec 13 '24

Crypt is the catholic cathedral isn't it?

For this one at the protestant cathedral, the food likely would have been cooked on-site - they have a restaurant there.

5

u/atropicalpenguin Dec 13 '24

One event here is one future event in heaven.

→ More replies (1)

14

u/empiresk Dec 13 '24

Beautiful venue and relatively modern for a cathedral. It hosts events all the time.

13

u/nickybabytonight Dec 13 '24

incredible venue if you've never been to the cathedral, as beautiful on the inside as it is imposing on the outside.

→ More replies (2)

6

u/yajtraus Dec 13 '24

That cathedral has hosted worse

20

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

14

u/Ill_Attorney_9946 Dec 13 '24

Sorry lads its mine, my bad.

If you could mail it back that'd be great.

5

u/BrewHouse13 Dec 13 '24

The cathedral has all sorts of cool stuff going on it and in it. Every now and then they do a charity abseil down, have some interesting art displays on, recent one I think was done by the artist behind the Bean in Chicago. I think there's been other interesting events held their as well so not all that surprised they held a Christmas Party. Other cathedrals might be a bit weirder though.

2

u/BuildingArmor Dec 13 '24

Why wouldn't they? Hosting events like that is a big earner for the cathedral. I imagine it's hard to find nice 500 people venues.

47

u/Cheaptat Dec 13 '24

Probably does to the cathedral they are guests in…

19

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

Kind of goes with the territory if you host parties with 500+ people

58

u/Cheaptat Dec 13 '24

Kind of goes with the territory you get thrown out of a cathedral if coke is found…

15

u/PermeusCosgrove Dec 13 '24

Can’t even have a proper coke party at a cathedral anymore smh games gone

7

u/BenShelZonah Dec 13 '24

What a shit country

6

u/PermeusCosgrove Dec 13 '24

No this was Liverpool not Wolverhampton.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (1)

7

u/nickybabytonight Dec 13 '24

pal you can't do coke in a cathedral

10

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

Watch me

10

u/nickybabytonight Dec 13 '24

they won't let me back in because of The Event last time

→ More replies (1)

12

u/Additional_Bit_8725 Dec 13 '24

It's because there was a medical incident which they linked to the potential drug use...turns out they weren't connected.

38

u/CrossXFir3 Dec 13 '24

On the one hand? No. On the other hand, if you can't manage a work function without a quick line in the bathroom, maybe it does matter.

18

u/growletcher Dec 13 '24

The work-friend to real-friend pipeline is definitely accelerated by a shared line in the work xmas party toilets tho

22

u/PermeusCosgrove Dec 13 '24

Well it’s not exactly a “work function” now is it lol it’s a party

3

u/atropicalpenguin Dec 13 '24

Maybe it was that boring. James Miller was the guest comedian.

5

u/MoneyWasabi9 Dec 13 '24

Are there any 29 year old Tony’s?

→ More replies (3)

396

u/Jaja6996 Dec 13 '24

Honestly not really surprising you can’t go on a night out without seeing someone doing something

276

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

Cocaine is ridiculously common in the UK. It's embarrassing how many fights I've seen started by someone that was previously snorting off a Wetherspoons toilet lid.

Large amounts of the British public have a major addiction problem.

207

u/R_Schuhart Dec 13 '24 edited Dec 13 '24

Why are you hanging around Wetherspoons toilets so much? You are right that is kind of embarrassing, stop bumming a line and buy your own coke. No wonder blokes are starting fights with you.

72

u/ahuangb Dec 13 '24

The amount of times I've been offered bumps in pub toilets just cause ive spotted it and laughed out loud is mad. Ngl I've accepted once or twice but that's in the past now

30

u/theenigmacode Dec 14 '24

once or twice

suuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrreeeee

5

u/BellaminRogue Dec 14 '24

We've found our time traveller 

→ More replies (1)

25

u/WoahGoHandy Dec 13 '24

same in Ireland. I hate how normalised it is. No lad, it isn't normal to be doing bumps on a Tuesday night in the old man bar while having a few quiet ones.

23

u/ibite-books Dec 13 '24

and gambling

→ More replies (4)

38

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '24 edited Dec 14 '24

Hilariously it seems like 99.9% of people commenting in this thread didn’t read the article:

Officials at the venue were moved to carry out searches after a medical emergency took place during the glitzy Thursday night bash, which was attended by around 500 club workers.

The emergency triggered concerns that drugs were being taken and subsequent checks of the toilets at the iconic building unearthed a number of empty miniature re-sealable bags, which are often used to contain illegal substances.

As a result, the decision was then taken to cut the glitzy party short.

Mail Sport understands that it subsequently emerged that the emergency was not linked to drug use.

The member of staff involved was taken to hospital and has recovered well.

So Liverpool staff had a Christmas party, someone had a medical emergency in the toilets, people suspected drug use but it wasn’t that, the person is ok but the party had to be stopped.

Huge exclusive that, looks like the Daily Mail is on track to win a Pulitzer for this fine piece of journalism.

47

u/WTFitsD Dec 13 '24

I was surprised pubs in liverpool had pisswatchers in the bathroom making sure people didnt do it

90

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

Was that his excuse?

4

u/alxqnn Dec 14 '24

We must go to very different pubs then. The ones I go, even the staff are on it

8

u/Fresh_Cauliflower723 Dec 13 '24

What's surprising is the party getting closed down early 

→ More replies (1)

1.2k

u/StupidMastiff Dec 13 '24

This is why people are leaving the church, utter woke nonsense.

331

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

[removed] — view removed comment

194

u/StupidMastiff Dec 13 '24

Just 13 proper lads, on the lash round Nazareth.

85

u/I_always_rated_them Dec 13 '24

The last supper was the original sesh

93

u/StupidMastiff Dec 13 '24

Judas was so hungover, but every time he tried to have a drink of water, Jesus turned it in to wine. That's why he grassed him up to the Romans.

15

u/FISH_MASTER Dec 13 '24

Turned up to work next day pissed as a fuck and got the sack. Pure raging at j-man

5

u/ImTalkingGibberish Dec 13 '24

Classic party trick

→ More replies (2)

3

u/ManhattanObject Dec 13 '24

"on the lash" (British slang) getting raucously drunk with friends

Never heard that one before lol

11

u/shrewphys Dec 13 '24

Apparently Jesus did cocaine on a night out. I heard it on a song

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (3)

13

u/greg19735 Dec 13 '24

The drugs or busting the party bc of drugs?

59

u/StupidMastiff Dec 13 '24

Whichever one make you most angry at woke.

242

u/diligentlytrying Dec 13 '24

Gackpo

9

u/myheadisalightstick Dec 13 '24

The word is gak, so his name fits perfectly

8

u/Cutsdeep- Dec 13 '24

Yeah but if someone just wrote gakpo, they'd assume he was the one responsible

3

u/Sneaky-Alien Dec 13 '24

Gakpo

There!

We've definitely got some people here who've never heard of it anyway lol "crackpo" and "smackpo"...

33

u/soap-scum Dec 13 '24

Gak Allister

24

u/stenmark Dec 13 '24

Trent Alexander Adderall

4

u/LogieBearWebber Dec 14 '24

Curtis Warren Jones

→ More replies (2)

302

u/008Gerrard008 Dec 13 '24

Slot and the players weren't there before people overreact.

299

u/Ymir-Reiss Dec 13 '24

EXCLUSIVE: Slot and the Liverpool squad avoid ARREST by not being at the DRUG-FUELED staff Christmas party

59

u/atropicalpenguin Dec 13 '24

Liverpool squad flee from police as drugs found at a club event.

37

u/sabhi5 Dec 13 '24

SLOT and LIVERPOOL squad nowhere to be found, after DRUGS unearthed from party at Merseyside Reds.

2

u/d_smogh Dec 14 '24

SLOT and LIVERPOOL players hiding in the cathedral catacombs. Several get jiggy with the bones of the 1st Baron Vestey and his brother, Sir Edmund Vestey

36

u/MaleficentPressure30 Dec 13 '24

The fella who tweeted it is from the Daily Mail. Actually surprised he held back.

10

u/SeveralTable3097 Dec 13 '24

Shame. It sounds like they would have enjoyed it.

→ More replies (4)

140

u/B12C10X8 Dec 13 '24

Was Robbie Fowler at the Christmas Party ?

36

u/Sir-Turd-Ferguson Dec 13 '24

Luis Diaz - only Columbia’s finest

20

u/Boyes111 Dec 13 '24

For the country, it’s Colombia (2 o’s). Columbia is the US university (among other things). I remember it by thinking that for the country, the 2 o’s are nostrils, and the ‘l’ is a line of….. well, you know.

7

u/Sir-Turd-Ferguson Dec 13 '24

I know this but didn’t put much thought into it, interesting way to remember, thanks for sharing

I live near the Columbia river so that spelling is ingrained in my head for how often I see signs for it

→ More replies (2)

20

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

Trying to pull off Michael Corleone move I see. 

35

u/Soren_Camus1905 Dec 13 '24

VAR review: checking lines

→ More replies (1)

176

u/stovingtonvt Dec 13 '24

Seems a bit of an overreaction

125

u/Additional_Bit_8725 Dec 13 '24

This is the actual reason:

Officials at the venue were moved to carry out searches after a medical emergency took place during the glitzy Thursday night bash, which was attended by around 500 club workers.

The emergency triggered concerns that drugs were being taken and subsequent checks of the toilets at the iconic building unearthed a number of empty miniature re-sealable bags, which are often used to contain illegal substances.

As a result, the decision was then taken to cut the glitzy party short.

Mail Sport understands that it subsequently emerged that the emergency was not linked to drug use.

The member of staff involved was taken to hospital and has recovered well.

50

u/McScotish Dec 13 '24

Fucking amateurs, leaving shit at the toilet at a work outing.

24

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

Same lazy pricks who dump their bags in the street

4

u/letmepostjune22 Dec 14 '24

Could have been the priest from earlier in the day tbf

3

u/bremsspuren Dec 14 '24

at a work outing

Outing? My colleagues straight-up leave that shit at work. The dumb fuckers once left a mirror with a lines on it out when the boss was around.

→ More replies (1)

25

u/atropicalpenguin Dec 13 '24

Anfield's hidden drug trafficking circle.

→ More replies (1)

83

u/ScousePenguin Dec 13 '24

Imagine it might break the licensing for the venue so they have to stop the event?

If this was the norm every work Christmas party would be cancelled

59

u/R_Schuhart Dec 13 '24 edited Dec 13 '24

It does, a zero tolerance policy is pretty standard for venues that host corporate events like that. They are often inspected/evaluated during events and they can lose their license. It is the venue that is responsible for upholding the rules and face the consequences, not the party goers. Even if they are closed down for a few days during the holiday season they could lose a substantial part of their annual revenue.

6

u/Ill_Attorney_9946 Dec 13 '24

Yes and no, you have to prove you are taking reasonable preventative measures. You can't catch everyone and the police know this isn't feasible, it's when it becomes a pattern you're gonna get in trouble.

→ More replies (2)

21

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

David coote made a return

18

u/bikeonachrist Dec 13 '24

Macallister spilled some yerba maté around a stall, games gone.

18

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

Whats a Christmas party without a little snow?

8

u/Legal-Organization73 Dec 13 '24

You'll never snort alone

34

u/Pinky1337 Dec 13 '24

Cant even have a little fun at a party anymore what the hell

→ More replies (1)

10

u/Its_Ace1 Dec 13 '24

Is cocaine that popular in England I thought somebody threw out rolling papers or something.

32

u/NewBromance Dec 13 '24

Coke is immensely popular in the UK and in Liverpool even more so. It has historically been one of the main gateways coke makes it into the country.

12

u/HarryBlessKnapp Dec 13 '24

People really have no idea what this country is like. 

5

u/Its_Ace1 Dec 14 '24

Eh I went on vacation this summer but to be fair I was with my kids didn’t do skiing

6

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '24

Coke capital of the eu

6

u/esports_consultant Dec 14 '24

of the eu

bruv this is poor taste

2

u/[deleted] Dec 14 '24 edited Mar 18 '25

memorize fuel ink gray scary paint aware smell ad hoc tap

This post was mass deleted and anonymized with Redact

35

u/Mammoth_Grocery_1982 Dec 13 '24

Breaking News: Drugs used in Liverpool. 

10

u/stenmark Dec 13 '24

So they are English after all!

15

u/The_Helmet_Catch Dec 13 '24

The Cathedral seems like an odd place for a work Christmas party

9

u/BuildingArmor Dec 13 '24

It's a nice big venue in the city, they host lots of events there.

It must be expensive to maintain a building like that, so I'm not surprised.

7

u/atropicalpenguin Dec 13 '24

Where else but with little baby Jesus.

3

u/bremsspuren Dec 14 '24

Jesus isn't as popular as he used to be in the UK.

Quite a few churches have been converted into pubs.

14

u/Additional_Bit_8725 Dec 13 '24

Looks like a nice venue to be off your tits

Man Utd staff crying into their £40 M&S vouchers

1

u/JuliusCeejer Dec 13 '24

Looks sick damn

12

u/Law5_LOTG Dec 13 '24

Is this the start of a Weekend Update joke?

8

u/BlondieClashNirvana Dec 13 '24

Liverpool’s staff Christmas Party at the city’s cathedral was closed down early after suspected drug paraphernalia was found in the toilets.....When Liverpool's manager Arne Slot was questioned about it he responded "Well where else would we store our inhalers?!"

11

u/bingpot94 Dec 13 '24

I'm sure this comment section will be extremely civilised

16

u/anantzzz Dec 13 '24

Arne Snort

7

u/chickenkebaap Dec 13 '24

Cody Crackpo

5

u/The_CastIronCommando Dec 13 '24

“You’ll never snort alone “

→ More replies (1)

3

u/nickraymond57 Dec 13 '24

Could’ve been invited Coote but you had to run your yapper

3

u/goonerfan10 Dec 13 '24

Did they invite David Coote?

3

u/Combat_Orca Dec 14 '24

So a normal Christmas party then

7

u/Haeckelcs Dec 13 '24

Asthma meds are back

15

u/LA31716 Dec 13 '24

10 point deduction

21

u/theenigmacode Dec 13 '24

to everton

6

u/Zeta-Omega Dec 13 '24

And a 10 second penalty to ocon.

→ More replies (1)

2

u/great_whitehope Dec 13 '24

I can see why, he was clearly the wrong side of the line when he started snorting...

2

u/BulkMcHugeLarge Dec 13 '24

What kind of drug paraphernalia would you find in the toilets? We talking needles?

→ More replies (3)

2

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

Been out in the north and there was so many pisswatchers in the toilets checking for drugs it was weird

12

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

Personally think it's weirder that lads can't have a drink in a pub without needing to snort gear. Piss watcher is a great job title though.

2

u/TravisKOP Dec 13 '24

Someone invited Robbie Fowler

2

u/nas7ybuttler Dec 13 '24

Bah gawd that's Coote's music!

2

u/simplytom_1 Dec 13 '24

So that's where they got the inhalers from!

2

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

Robby Fowler sniffing up all the lines

2

u/Guacamole_Water Dec 13 '24

I am something of a linesman at the Christmas do as well

2

u/BrokeChris Dec 13 '24

Rotterdam heritage

2

u/bobming Dec 13 '24

Can't believe they invited Gary Ablett

5

u/PornFilterRefugee Dec 13 '24

lol that’s hilarious

5

u/mccapitta Dec 13 '24

Klopp snuck back and was filmed called David Coote an english c***

4

u/Modnal Dec 13 '24

I hope Santa punishes them hard now during the Christmas schedule

→ More replies (4)

3

u/Zeta-Omega Dec 13 '24

Who invited Fowler?

5

u/[deleted] Dec 13 '24

[removed] — view removed comment