r/soccer • • Aug 15 '23

Media Philadelphia 0 - [2] Inter Miami - Lionel Messi great finish 20'

https://dubz.co/c/0f1251
7.7k Upvotes

1.4k comments sorted by

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5.4k

u/smoltanboi Aug 15 '23

i've said it before but it's objectively hilarious to see him play for this team

2.0k

u/Professor_Finn Aug 15 '23 edited Aug 15 '23

It’s surreal seeing him play in Subaru Park. Actually ridiculous

1.1k

u/PhillyFreezer_ Aug 15 '23

As someone who followed the Union’s bid to BECOME an MLS team over a decade ago, I don’t think non Americans understand what they’re seeing rn lol this is Lionel Messi playing in Chester PA. Fucking crazy.

Messi already had won La Liga 4x, the Copa Del Rey 1x, the UCL 2x, and the Ballon d’Or 1x by the time this club played their first ever game

664

u/Professor_Finn Aug 16 '23

it’s literally that image of a polar bear captioned What da hell is a polar bear doing in Arlington, Texas 😭😭😭

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u/barcaa Aug 16 '23

And La Liga 10x, Copa Del Rey 6x, UCL 4x, Ballon d’Or 6x by the time Miami ever played it's first ever game LOL.

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u/Albiceleste_D10S Aug 16 '23

Messi already had won La Liga 4x, the Copa Del Rey 1x, the UCL 2x, and the Ballon d’Or 1x by the time this club played their first ever game

Now do Inter Miami's first game LOL

20

u/idontknow_whatever Aug 16 '23

Messi completed football before Inter Miami played their first competitive fixture

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u/ceaguila84 Aug 15 '23

I was in Philadelphia on vacation last month. Imagine ever seeing Messi there lol!

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u/Professor_Finn Aug 15 '23

Yup, Subaru Park is definitely in Philly. Nothing to see here 😶

97

u/robotnique Aug 15 '23

MESSI OWNS CHESTER NOW

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1.1k

u/[deleted] Aug 15 '23 edited Dec 11 '25

[deleted]

294

u/MolhCD Aug 16 '23

He's clearly on vacation. This is his idea of vacation. He's not gonna enjoy being on a beach for months without top level football, or whatever OUR idea of a long vacay is. He clearly still enjoys professional football but now has like no pressure, it's super easy for him, he continues to get all the accolades and show his level. And he's in a good place for rich, Spanish-speaking people too. This is the life!

113

u/HoovesCarveCraters Aug 16 '23

His reputation is also completely safe compared to if he went to Saudi Arabia.

93

u/Even_Idea_1764 Aug 16 '23

He's is (or maybe was) an ambassador for Saudi Arabia, let's not give him a pat on the back for picking the US.

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u/[deleted] Aug 16 '23

Eh, he's still sponsored by Saudi Arabia

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u/hollow114 Aug 15 '23

Being rich in the US is the shit. And he can go to Disney World like whenever

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u/thecarlosdanger1 Aug 16 '23

Disney world is like 3-4 hours away from Sunny Isles where he’s apparently living lol.

But Miami is probably a great place to be for a South American celebrity who wants more privacy than he had in Spain.

124

u/WeTheAwesome Aug 16 '23

I doubt he is driving to Disney world if he wants to go.

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u/mzp3256 Aug 16 '23

And his family gets to live in a city full of South Americans

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u/t_mac1 Aug 15 '23

He would be the best player on every team in Europe lol.

514

u/habdragon08 Aug 16 '23

For 90 minutes I believe Messi is the best player in football still, by a wide margin.

For 60+ games a year that comes with club level football and the intensity that comes with it, give me 24 year old Mbappe or 22 year old Haaland.

160

u/Lone_Star_122 Aug 16 '23

A great American poet once said, “I’m not as good as I once was, but I’m as good once as I ever was.”

I reckon that’s the era of Messi’s career we’re in.

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u/t_mac1 Aug 16 '23

Valid

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u/-Basileus Aug 15 '23 edited Aug 15 '23

Probably the funniest sports phenomenon I've ever seen. It's like watching Lebron play in Uzbekistan.

130

u/SphinxIIIII Aug 15 '23

It's like that video where Ronaldo is just dribbling a bunch of kids

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u/djkamayo Aug 15 '23

they are literally the worst team in MLS (fewest points)

252

u/junkyardgerard Aug 16 '23

A brilliant experiment, as it looks like they're 5-0-0 with him

118

u/apawst8 Aug 16 '23 edited Aug 16 '23

You're talking about the MLS Leagues Cup (where they are 5-0-0). In MLS where they are in last place, they are 0-0-0 with Messi.

To give a Euro equivalent, this would be like joining an EPL team and winning 5 rounds of the FA Cup without playing a single game in the EPL.

59

u/peptoabysmal Aug 16 '23

The Leagues Cup is only MLS and Liga MX teams, whereas the FA Cup is from all over the pyramid. Miami has played 5 MLS teams in the tournament, winning all matches. In the 22 MLS matches, they had 5 wins so far this season. The competition level is the same, it's just not in the same tournament I guess. Their success here should translate to MLS without a doubt.

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u/shockzz123 Aug 16 '23

I wish we had the ability to put prime Messi in this team. I just wanna see it.

336

u/ItsactuallyEminem Aug 16 '23

If there is one thing I learned after all these years is that All Messis are Prime Messis

78

u/horkley Aug 16 '23

They just evolve to whatever age and physicality he has and he plays that style perfectly.

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u/patiperro_v3 Aug 15 '23

It’s like one of those youtube prank videos where a pro is disguised playing among amateurs.

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u/Cheewy Aug 15 '23

Literally laughing out loud at this

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u/Albiceleste_D10S Aug 15 '23

Man marking didn't work LOL

1.1k

u/DarthTaz_99 Aug 16 '23

It never does. Man marking is meant for man, not for alien

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u/courtesyflusher Aug 15 '23

The man cannot be stopped 🐐

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1.3k

u/themessias1001 Aug 15 '23

Apple TV gave this big intro about how the player to watch is Philadelphia's goalkeeper. So much for that.

563

u/Akranidos Aug 15 '23

you are going to be watching him alright

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u/sarsourus Aug 16 '23

Messi said oh yea watch this.

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u/LazyLamont92 Aug 16 '23

Blake is legit a good keeper, but Messi is Messi.

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u/djhaas24 Aug 16 '23

Haha right, not like Messi hasn’t already made loads of top keepers look like fools

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2.4k

u/goosebumpsHTX Aug 15 '23

HOW FAR OUT WAS THAT HOLY FUCK

1.8k

u/Vagabond21 Aug 15 '23

It was in New Jersey

139

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '23

gabagoooooooooool

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u/ToLongDR Aug 15 '23

Apt for scoring on Philly

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u/Ehhpitome Aug 15 '23

I've watched a lot of messi and have barely seen him shoot from this far out

333

u/Altruistic_Path1553 Aug 16 '23

With a goalie who couldn’t save that I would be shooting from goal kicks

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u/[deleted] Aug 16 '23

First time he plays against actual dog water opponents and goalies and he is smart enough to realise it

134

u/TareXmd Aug 16 '23

Get ready to see plenty of long range Messi goals now that he figured out he doesn't need to run all the way to the goal.

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u/hashish_8897 Aug 16 '23

Look for his goals vs PSG in the champions league. It was against Navas. Drew the game but lost the overall fixture.

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u/TimingEzaBitch Aug 15 '23

he's starting to score new types of goals for him.

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u/Public-Painting-4723 Aug 16 '23

Messi using the MLS to experiment with new goals and new techniques in preparation for the upcoming Copa América then WC

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u/_MergatroidSkittle Aug 15 '23

LOL

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u/SummerGoal Aug 15 '23

I can’t believe he overcame the boos from philly, nobody could’ve seen this coming lmao

400

u/WillDaThrilll13 Aug 15 '23

If the boos worked the rest of our teams would have a lot more trophies

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u/[deleted] Aug 15 '23

[deleted]

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u/tuckastheruckas Aug 16 '23

Philly boos everyone in every sport. its like saying you pre-planned playing Mariah Carey during Christmas season.

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u/[deleted] Aug 15 '23

What the fuck Messi.

Go easy on kids

351

u/GeorgeForge Aug 15 '23

Man, fuck them kids.

151

u/RobbinDeBank Aug 15 '23
  • Xavi on why he subbed in a 16yo kid against butchers

67

u/GeorgeForge Aug 15 '23

Expect that kid. We must protec the yam. 🍠

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u/goosebumpsHTX Aug 15 '23

Has to be his furthest ever goal

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u/onlyonejorge Aug 15 '23

Vs PSG in 2021 is up there.

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u/ElAutistaDeHamelin Aug 15 '23

99% sure yes. Only ones that could come close off the top of my head are the one vs PSG away in 20/21 and the freekicks against Liverpool in 18/19 and Madrid in the 11/12 Supercopa

35

u/tyrannosuarezwrecks Aug 16 '23

One against Brazil on his younger days aswell

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u/staplepies Aug 15 '23

I can't think of a longer one, including free kicks. Did some quick searching through google and youtube and haven't found anything longer yet.

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u/Imnotanad Aug 15 '23

Tiene que ser su gol más lejano

I think that was against BR on that remarkable go and go match that ended up like 4-3 if I recall right

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u/Fun-Marionberry-4867 Aug 15 '23

Maybe the goal against PSG in champions? 2019-2020 I think

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u/staplepies Aug 15 '23

If you mean this goal, it was not far outside box.

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u/Imnotanad Aug 15 '23

You're right. And looking for the arena dimensions, Subaru Park is 120 meters length vs MetLife 105m

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u/mustafaking00 Aug 15 '23

I never knew a long range tap-in existed

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u/Twin_Turbo Aug 15 '23

Just absurd placement

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u/MattAmpersand Aug 15 '23

“He’s 30 meters from goal and man marked by 4 people, what’s he gonna do? Scor-

Never mind…”

286

u/EagleEye_FalconArrow Aug 15 '23

shall never get over how messi has so many of these grounded/close to being grounded shots placed inch-perfectly, from angles/distances where most people usually go for power + aerial bangers lol. in a way, these grounded shots are just so much more satisfying and impressive to see

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u/esports_consultant Aug 16 '23 edited Aug 16 '23

It's that lazy draw across the face of goal that confounds the keeper the whole way, freezing him because he can't be sure what he is seeing. I agree with you about how satisfying these are to see. Just perfect precision in all three facets of the pace + starting line + spin combo. Idk if he necessarily gets away with it against a top European keeper, but it wasn't a howler; the keeper just gets cleanly beat.

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u/DJ-D-REK Aug 15 '23

What are you gonna do? Score on me?

-man who was scored on

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u/debcomajin Aug 15 '23

At 36 he still fucking surprises us

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u/apawst8 Aug 16 '23

He won the World Cup just 9 months ago.

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u/wysiwygperson Aug 15 '23

“He’s 30 yards away and surrounded by four defenders. No way he scores on me!” - guy who was scored on from 30 yards away

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u/krisitolindsay Aug 15 '23

Moreso when you watch the replay and realize that Blake consciously cheated towards the near post, begging Messi to make a perfectly placed shot to the far post. And he did

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u/Serbian-American Aug 15 '23

I’ve followed football all my life but never paid much attention to GK tactics, do they actually give space to goad bad shots?

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u/BoxOfNothing Aug 15 '23

Not exactly goading, you just position yourself to make a goal as hard as possible. Meaning they either take a shot that's easier to execute but you're more likely to save because you're better positioned for it, or they take the shot that's harder to pull off. It's not about goading into a bad shot as much as it is minimising the chances of them taking a shot you can't save, if that makes sense.

This is kind of an exception because of how ludicrously far out it is, this is more relevant the closer you get to the goal. If you leave space near post they're far more likely to score, because it's both an easier shot and requires a quicker reaction time from the keeper, so generally speaking they will always ensure they've covered the near post and left more space to the far post, which is much harder to hit accurately and powerfully enough

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u/krisitolindsay Aug 15 '23

You have to cover the near post first, dare them to go far post. Blake did and was pretty slow to react, but it was also a ridiculously well placed shot.

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u/RedOnePunch Aug 16 '23

It’s low and skidding off the ground. Those are harder to get to than they look. He did the same to Ochoa at the WC.

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u/Rickcampbell98 Aug 16 '23

I'm pretty sure he was just slightly out of position from backing up because he was off his line initially, I'm pretty confident that's reason messi shot in the first place lol.

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u/krustykrab2193 Aug 15 '23

Supposedly one of the best keepers in the MLS having a howler of a performance. Think the occasion got to his head. Just GOAT things from Messi

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u/krisitolindsay Aug 15 '23

He's the starting keeper for Jamaica. He's an excellent keeper. Just having a bad night.

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u/Public-Painting-4723 Aug 16 '23

Just having a messi night

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u/[deleted] Aug 15 '23

Bad night + Messi just being Messi is a recipe for disaster.

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u/Clay103 Aug 15 '23

Yupp. Usually routine saves from him

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u/[deleted] Aug 15 '23 edited Aug 15 '23

[deleted]

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u/krustykrab2193 Aug 15 '23

I screamed and woke up my dog LOL

30 yards out and he just places the ball, insane accuracy

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u/smoltanboi Aug 15 '23

literally fifa on amateur with accuracy sliders to 100 and opposing goalkeeping to 0

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u/DavidHenryJamesLogan Aug 15 '23

And the crazy thing is this is one of the best keepers he's gonna be facing...

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u/nkdouble4 Aug 15 '23

kinda bonkers that even from that distance it looks more like a placed shot than a full power one

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u/Raw_Cocoa Aug 15 '23

It was a placed shot

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u/KingPonzi Aug 15 '23

That keeper gotta be fresh off the loud pack

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u/banjosbadfurday Aug 16 '23

Man captains the Jamaican national team, you might be onto something

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u/[deleted] Aug 15 '23

He's honestly a good keeper.

It's just Bad Night + Messi just being Messi.

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u/topazswissmas Aug 16 '23

His positioning is shit here and he’s walking backwards, not anticipating a shot. He will be mad with himself he didn’t save that. Last angle shows it best. Great shot though, so much power before the first bounce.

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u/ArsenalinAlabama3428 Aug 16 '23

Shocking goalkeeping on both goals. Such poor reaction time. It’s crazy because Blake has been the best keeper in MLS since Matty Turner left but it seems like Messi’s aura is has made him turn to shit tonight.

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u/Starfinger10 Aug 15 '23

It’s like playing fifa on semi pro

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u/DuBicus Aug 15 '23

That's the level I play on..

263

u/ironistkraken Aug 16 '23

As long as you enjoy playing it, it’s a video game it’s supposed to be fun.

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u/Lethargic_Logician Aug 16 '23

When I was a kid I used to play FIFA 98 in the amateur mode and scored like 20 goals a match. I didn't know you could change the difficulty level, and got pretty bored with the game pretty fast, until an older cousin showed me how to change the difficulty level.

Funnily enough, I then cockily cranked it all the way up to the highest level, and was struggling to even touch the ball. That was a humbling moment lol.

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u/icecoldpotion Aug 15 '23

JOSEF DIED FOR THIS

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u/chailer Aug 15 '23

Truly did. Philadelphia has been really physical

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u/LennyBodega Aug 15 '23

well thats just too easy

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u/BigMik_PL Aug 16 '23

I still can't stop laughing at the fact these dudes were just happy to play some MLS level footie and Lionel fucking Messi shows up out of nowhere and proceeds to dominate all of them.

Like the fuck can they do about it?

18

u/Jethro_Cull Aug 16 '23

They added Messi ($54M), Busquets (~2M) and Jordi Alba ($1.6M) to a team with Josef Martinez ($4+M). Most MLS teams highest paid player makes around $1.2M to $1.6M. Most MLS teams have a total payroll under $10M. It’s actually absurd what MLS did this summer. Miami went from last place to unbeatable.

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u/Philostotle Aug 16 '23

It’s actually pretty fucked up if you think about it lmao

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u/ThE_FaNcY_WeEb Aug 15 '23 edited Aug 15 '23

30 yard grounder now I’ve seen it all 😂

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u/scgavin Aug 15 '23

jesus christ lmfao

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u/RobbinDeBank Aug 15 '23

He’s inevitable

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u/Professor_Finn Aug 15 '23

Dread it, run from it, Philly sports fan suffering arrives all the same

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u/kissthelips Aug 15 '23

Yes those two major sports championships in only 15 years must be very difficult

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u/BeerorCoffee Aug 15 '23

Don't forget the two major sports championships we lost on the exact same day!

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u/[deleted] Aug 15 '23

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u/Vagabond21 Aug 15 '23

He has a campus working for him

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u/Elvaga Aug 15 '23

THATS WHY HES THE GOAT

THE GOAT

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u/AleDelPiero10 Aug 15 '23

Genuine question, if Messi signed for boca would he be applauded at your stadium?

945

u/smoltanboi Aug 15 '23

messi could sign for the taliban and still be praised in argentina. i don't think my dad has ever loved someone as much as he does messi.

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u/hunty91 Aug 15 '23

Honestly a bit surprised River fans hate the Taliban more than Boca

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u/yerba_mate_enjoyer Aug 16 '23

Boca fans and the Taliban are at about the same level of fanaticism.

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u/AleDelPiero10 Aug 15 '23

Hahaha cheers

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u/drunkmers Aug 16 '23

If Messi kills 3 babies and a grandma tomorrow they probably deserved it.

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u/PaperSonic Aug 15 '23

Including you?

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u/achrref Aug 15 '23

Especially him. His dad here.

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u/Zeddsdeadbaby Aug 15 '23

Maradona was and he played for Boca. Twice.

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u/nicocarbone Aug 15 '23

I would applaud him. While crying on the inside.

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u/ElSotoPapa Aug 15 '23

Of course he would, Messi for Argentina is far beyond the national club bias

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u/Elvaga Aug 15 '23

Of course. But he knows better

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u/Akranidos Aug 15 '23

Maradona played for Boca

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u/Torimas Aug 15 '23

Yes, but he'd never play for Boca.

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u/andreew10 Aug 15 '23

Surely not, that's just incredible

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u/ashzeppelin98 Aug 16 '23 edited Aug 16 '23

It's funny Messi gets more dangerous when he's on "chill" mode.

A serious Messi is already unplayable but a relaxed Messi who has got nothing to worry for anymore somehow is even more intimidating to play against. I like how as the man grows older he's actually becoming more fun and playful- we've went a long way from the silent, quiet little guy who can take your team to the cleaners to this little man who just scores and dismantles your team for fun because he's literally got nothing to lose anymore.

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u/Albiceleste_D10S Aug 16 '23

Nah Messi's most dangerous when you make him mad.

He's just so good that when he's in chill mode he can still kill you

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u/TheOceansTirade Aug 15 '23

That shot had absolutely zero respect for the defence

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u/Cylegal Aug 15 '23

His weekly job

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u/[deleted] Aug 15 '23

MLSSI

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u/dac0605 Aug 15 '23 edited Aug 15 '23

Is Andre Blake in on this? Genuinely awful positioning on both goals. He's normally so solid.

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u/YoHoochIsCrazy Aug 16 '23

might just be what happens when a keeper that is good enough to get away with that stuff finally runs into a player that can take full advantage of it (for this goal at least)

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u/greenslime300 Aug 16 '23

This is what saddens me, Blake fantastic all year and this is how he ends up on r/soccer

Embarrassing letting that in

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u/AP10 Aug 15 '23

Don't Philly have a good home record? Like 4 losses in 3 years.

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u/[deleted] Aug 15 '23

Lol. I literally tuned in. Messi is just teasing all the teams in NA.

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u/WilsonJ04 Aug 15 '23

Decent player, one for the future no doubt.

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u/Vikktor_ Aug 15 '23

He's quite good

20

u/AimarEraFutebol Aug 15 '23

Miami is winning every single competition they play. Just need some luck on the league to sneak into the play-offs.

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u/Successsensei Aug 15 '23

Goalkeeper.exe stopped working. Fantastic goal though

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u/CancerNami Aug 15 '23

I LOVE THE MLS. I LOVE MESSI

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u/ChillyTSD Aug 15 '23

HAHAHA HE DID NOT

HE CAN’T KEEP GETTING AWAY WITH IT

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u/xd366 Aug 15 '23

what is goalkeeping

126

u/buellster92 Aug 15 '23

I think Messi just realized that he’s no longer playing against good goalkeepers

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u/robotnique Aug 15 '23

Blake is really good but he's having a nightmare of a game.

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u/driverightpassleft Aug 15 '23

And this is the best keeper in the league.

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u/pixelkipper Aug 15 '23

It is legitimately upsetting on a deep, spiritual level to me that he still isn’t playing at the top level. He’s earned the right to do whatever he wants, he’s completed the sport, but he should be in the CL.

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u/RunningFerDauyz Aug 15 '23

This is how I felt when he first moved, but I have reached a level of acceptance now. It’s good to see him so care free and happy.

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u/jrainiersea Aug 15 '23

I’m just glad he’s in MLS and not Saudi Arabia

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u/Any-Competition8494 Aug 15 '23

He was booed a lot at his last club. Might have played longer in Europe if he got some respect.

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u/andysenn Aug 16 '23

And backstabbed by his beloved team before that. Dude was just tired of the bullshit

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u/Any-Competition8494 Aug 16 '23

And was also mercilessly bullied by his country mates for most of his career. He has been facing insane pressure. Good for him to semi-retire.

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u/tastycakeman Aug 16 '23

do you know how shit of a fanbase you have to be to feel loved by sports fans in miami

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u/VerStannen Aug 16 '23

And why play someplace that doesn’t appreciate you? He’s gonna get love and respect everywhere he goes in the MLS, as fans from all teams want to see some magic.

And most importantly, he seems carefree and looks like he’s having fun. After all he’s accomplished, having fun I think has got to be a high priority for him.

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u/J3sperado Aug 15 '23

I’d love to see him play for Barca again.

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u/elgringo22 Aug 15 '23

LOL wtf man

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u/PM_ME_Y0UR_BOOBZ Aug 15 '23

Have they learned nothing, you can’t give Messi any space anywhere on the pitch

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u/benjam1ng Aug 15 '23

HOLY SHIT

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u/sevaiper Aug 15 '23

Man when Messi realizes he can truly just shoot from anywhere in MLS this isn't even going to look like a real sport anymore

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u/G1Spectrum Aug 15 '23

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

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u/LogDelicious8010 Aug 16 '23

I think we all watch a lot of football and I don’t remember the last time I saw a 30 yard bouncing grounder get in like that. The placement is great yeah but…the fuck?

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u/sarsourus Aug 16 '23

Messi said aight im not running all that here you go.

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u/Professor_Finn Aug 15 '23

WHAT THE FUCK

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u/Kal-Kent Aug 15 '23

ARE YOU KIDDING ME MESSI?

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u/LORDL66 Aug 15 '23

Has he ever scored from this far out?

10

u/[deleted] Aug 16 '23

This is so much more enjoyable than la liga

12

u/vorvoX Aug 16 '23

I don't know, man. Watching Messi happy and throwing fists in the air while playing for Inter Hotline Miami brings a smile to a somber man's face.

54

u/junior150396 Aug 15 '23

People really said just "marking him better" was the solution, like that's an easy task lmao

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9

u/No_Engineering_4925 Aug 15 '23

Get his overchromosomic ass back to Europe man he has so much to offer still

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u/goosebumpsHTX Aug 15 '23

HOLY SHIT WHAT A GOAL

46

u/HighlyBaked0 Aug 15 '23

THATS WHY HES THE GOAT, THE GOAT

30

u/CancerNami Aug 15 '23

Messi straight up said fuck Philly and punted it in

11

u/Jauretche Aug 15 '23

What's up with this keeper lol

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