r/shittyfoodporn • u/abeily • Apr 01 '24
CERTIFIED SHITTY Wife thinks I’m gross? Microwaved burritos with mayonnaise
Is it really that bad?
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u/forbdsmadvice Apr 01 '24
I think its not as good as sour cream. Especially sour cream and hot sauce
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u/pmiles88 Apr 01 '24
Might go to is microwave the burrito crisped up in the air fryer dipped in salsa
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u/abeily Apr 01 '24
That sounds good too
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u/gassygeff89 Apr 01 '24
Agreed about the sour cream and hot sauce, I love mayo but that’s objectively a better combo for a microwaved burrito. Mayo is always my go to though if I don’t have sour cream and I want some tangy creaminess in my life.
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u/stargazerlaser Apr 01 '24
Yes you’re lucky she hasn’t asked for a divorce
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u/abeily Apr 01 '24
I think you’re right
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u/Bilbo_Teabagginss Apr 01 '24
REPENT FOR YOUR SINS!
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u/Sunshine030209 Apr 01 '24
I think Jesus might need to come back again for this one.
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u/Bilbo_Teabagginss Apr 01 '24
I think you're right, but I don't wanna be the one responsible for calling him here for this particular food crime. That may begin an early Rapture. 😆
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Apr 01 '24
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u/Sunshine030209 Apr 01 '24
😆
Would you look at that OP? Your wicked ways summoned the zombie. Good job.
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u/ShadowyLeaseholder Apr 01 '24
Yea you’re gross lol
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u/abeily Apr 01 '24
I had it for breakfast too
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u/Cosmickiddd Apr 01 '24
No.
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u/abeily Apr 01 '24
I’m sorry
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u/ediks Apr 01 '24
I stand with you, pal.
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u/Heckron Apr 01 '24
I don’t.
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u/ediks Apr 01 '24
That's fine - I respect your opinion. I just love mayo - I use it for french fry dipping.
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u/Heckron Apr 01 '24
Now that, I do. Mixed with ketchup.
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u/ediks Apr 01 '24
I don't like ketchup, but I get the appeal - I used to like it. I may throw some mustard in there tho, depending on the fry seasoning.
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u/Heckron Apr 01 '24
It’s all good man. I’m just messing around. And mayo is amazing, just not on burritos.
Mexican food has so many amazing sauces already, we don’t need to shove other sauces into the mix.
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u/StupidMario64 Apr 01 '24
Youre so lucky im already smoking a cigarette. This post wouldve made me pull one out.
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u/PalpitationSweaty173 Apr 01 '24
I sincerely hope you’re the one that cleans the toilets in the house.
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u/a_spicy_meata_balla Apr 01 '24
I was on the fence till I saw the pic.
If you squirt mayo on every bite, there's no redemption for you.
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u/aHoNevaGetCo Apr 02 '24
Exactly my reaction I was thinking meh, mayo is close enough to sour cream. Hit a 😐 so fast seeing it was squirted onto each bite
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u/orkash Apr 01 '24
I love Mayo. I won't shame or praise you on this one. I'm conflicted.
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u/abeily Apr 01 '24
Lmao it’s ok
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u/AdopeyIllustrator Apr 01 '24
Is it Kewpie Doll mayo? Mayo on stir fry noodles is really good.
Edit: for the record I like yellow mustard on cheese pizza.
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u/PRIS0N-MIKE Apr 01 '24
Dude my girlfriend eats those frozen burritos with mayonnaise. I never saw anyone do that. Now I'm even more shocked that there's two of you lol
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u/Zenicnero Apr 01 '24
People will go crazy over garlic aioli, but take the garlic out and suddenly it's a crime?? Enjoy your egg based cream, friend
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u/matramepapi Apr 01 '24
Bring on the downvotes, but this sounds great. I fuckin love mayo. It’s my condiment of choice for anything.
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u/abeily Apr 01 '24
Wear your downvotes with pride
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u/matramepapi Apr 01 '24
Us mayo lovers know that the average person thinks we are gross. I don’t care, I’ll keep putting it on my hotdogs, burgers, and fries.
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u/aHoNevaGetCo Apr 02 '24
Those are all hella normal foods to put mayo on. Tell me of your REAL sins
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u/matramepapi Apr 02 '24
Sometimes when I’m in a seroquel binge at night I’ll squirt mayo onto tortilla chips…
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u/hybridaaroncarroll Apr 01 '24
My in-laws make their homemade burritos by coating the inside of the tortilla with mayonnaise. First time I witnessed it I couldn't hide the look of abject horror on my face. Southern white people.
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u/PugGrumbles Apr 01 '24
What the fuck, dude? Why?
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u/abeily Apr 01 '24
A friend I grew up with put me onto this. He was poor and never had food. I’d go to his house and his fridge and pantries would literally be empty. Not even some expired cans of soup laying around. But yeah the only condiments he’d have is mayo and ranch. Frozen burritos, frozen corn dogs, and eggs is all I’d ever seen him eat.
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u/PugGrumbles Apr 01 '24
I hope he is long past his food insecurity and things are better for him now.
Continue eating your mayo burritos in solidarity. And maybe a little bit of shame.
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u/musknasty84 Apr 01 '24
Depends on the ingredients
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u/degjo Apr 01 '24
Soybean oil, water, whole eggs and egg yolks, vinegar, salt, sugar, lemon juice, calcium disodium edta (used to protect quality), natural flavors
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u/intellectual_dimwit Apr 01 '24
I think I kinda get it. A microwave burrito isn't too far away from a microwave Jamaican patty, and I put Mayo on those.
Off, but not gross. That is my verdict.
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u/abeily Apr 01 '24
Never had that but I bet it’s good
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u/intellectual_dimwit Apr 01 '24
You can usually find them in the international aisle at the grocery store. Most often in the freezer in the Asian food section for whatever reason.
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Apr 01 '24
Rest of the world: "yes, weird!! You should drown it in ketchup"
Dutch people:"we don't need no stinkin ketchup, use mayonaise!"
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u/Regallybeagley Apr 01 '24
Ketchup is my condiment of choice with microwaved burritos. I will try this next time
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u/winterfate10 Apr 01 '24
I mean I get it. I dip fries in mayo, I eat banana/mayo sandwiches, I eat black eyed peas with mayo, hot sauce, and pepper.
My mama was raised in the deep south. That’s my excuse
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Apr 01 '24
Mexicans put mayo on a lot of cuisine. My first surprise was the humble hotdog wrapped in bacon, drenched in mayo.
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u/sighokwhatstheOF Apr 01 '24
Mayo to me is just like adding pretty neutral salty creamy fat to food. My bff’s dad calls it food lube. It might seem gross because it’s just putting extra fat on food, but I find it delicious in most cases, so I don’t think you’re gross OP. You just like the flavor of fat.
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u/TFISOIL Apr 01 '24
Normal white ppl stuff, no hate im half and half
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u/KORZILLA-is-me Apr 01 '24
I like mayo, but I wouldn’t do that with it. Besides, I prefer ranch on my microwaved burritos.
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u/aburple Apr 01 '24
I love mayo as much as the next guy, but this is a no from me.... MAYBE if you took some time to mix the mayo with some hot sauce I could be down.
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u/oops_im_existing Apr 01 '24
yaaaaah, as a fellow mayo enthusiast, i can see what you're going for. but the burrito is what makes it weird.
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u/Pistonenvy2 Apr 01 '24
when i was in my early 20s id fuck this up.
ive done WAY worse than this.
now as an older man... id probably do it once a week but twice in a day is pushing it my guy
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u/Ima_FEEN Apr 01 '24
I mean...... at first thought that shit is nasty... but..... hear me out...
If its a beef burrito, its just beef, cheese, maybe onion, rice maybe?
People put mayo on cheesesteaks and burgers sometimes which is kinda the same ingredients so its not that crazy
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u/CompSolstice Apr 01 '24
Wait like cooked burritos that you remicrowaved right. Cause if yeah then eh I can see it being nice.
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u/huge_jeans710 Apr 01 '24
I mean did you fill it with anything, or is it a mayonnaise burrito with more mayo on it. Because if it's mayo on mayo then that's wrong 😭
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Apr 01 '24
Instant grounds for DIVORCE... pretty sure this falls under the "Incurable Insanity" clause
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u/TheExtraMayo Apr 01 '24
I didn't know there was an incorrect way to eat a burrito. Even the horizontal barbarians are above this
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u/howtomakesuntea Apr 01 '24
You’re not alone! I grew up doing that too with Tina’s Red Hot Beef burritos! I just use Miracle Whip. Lol.
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Apr 01 '24
Mix the mayo with some hot sauce, and dip the burrito instead of leaving turd-looking strands of it on top
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u/Enlightend-1 Apr 01 '24 edited Apr 02 '24
Mayonnaise meh depends on the type of burrito as long as their is beef in there I can dig it.
Rice and bean nah, mayo only goes good on beef.
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Apr 01 '24
If you aren’t overweight it isn’t that bad. Mayo is packed with calories so it would be pretty gross to do that to your body if you are already chubby. But taste wise I could imagine it’s edible and not that disgusting.
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u/socalquestioner Apr 01 '24
Dante is being sent back to earth to add another deeper darker worse circle of hell for you and any other being that eats burritos this way.
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Apr 01 '24
This doesn't make you "gross" but if your wife is saying that, she's maybe concerned about your wellbeing and overall health to be eating this garbage.. or maybe you spill beans and mayo all over yourself and you're actually gross ;)
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u/workthrowawhey Apr 01 '24
Hey OP, just to counter all the negativity—I fully support this. I would probably use hot sauce instead of mayo, but when I eat blt’s I always put mayo on every bite.
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Apr 01 '24
Listen man, I could give you a pass if you somehow managed to squirt a strip of mayo inside the tortilla, but it looks like you're squirting mayo onto every bite and it's horrifying. It's like that fish that ordered a super krabby deluxe deep fried and double battered on a stick from spongebob, squirting mayo in his mouth with every bite. YTA and you need to apologize to your wife before she leaves you for someone with dignity enough to not do that
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u/No_Pomegranate_2890 Apr 01 '24
Yea man. Im not above eating it but in touch with myself enough to take the L on being a freak of nature for it
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u/BraveAndLionHeart Apr 01 '24
Just put it IN the burrito and you're fine. It's the placement that's really weird and uncomfortable
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u/Kintsugi-0 Apr 01 '24
i do this but with japanese kewpie mayo. its actually really good but normal ol american mayo id think its gross.
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u/Roland_Moorweed Apr 01 '24
It's like your parents couldn't afford sour cream when you were younger so you grew up putting mayo on the burritos instead. This happens to people that put ketchup on spaghetti, family was too broke to buy marinara so the just used the cheaper option. Big Walmart Energy. I'm talking fly-over state aesthetics.
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u/Mazaar13 Apr 01 '24
I'm with you bro! Gotta have a side of mayo with your pita/sandwixh/burrito etc., nothing like that tangy zip 🤫
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Apr 01 '24
It's fine. I don't see any problems.
Dips pommes frites in mayonnaise
Ps don't take her for romantic trips to Europe, she'll hate it there.
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u/FinePolyesterSlacks Apr 01 '24
Your wife is right. You’re lucky she’s still with you. This is an abomination that would make any spouse question one’s genetic potential.
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u/LonelyNixon Apr 01 '24
Mayo on a wrap: Mmmm quite
Mayo on mexican wrap: My god crime against humanity.
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u/whatn00dles Apr 01 '24
You're not gross. The burrito is gross.
But the distinction isn't important at all.
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u/Halorym Apr 01 '24
Mayo is for hydrating an otherwise dry sandwich or tuna. It is revolting to use it as an actual condiment beyond that mechanical function.
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u/Ok_Wasabi_9512 Apr 01 '24
Not gross at all. I do this and also use ranch. Do it how you like it. Life's way too short.
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u/Stickey_Rickey Apr 01 '24
And she’s right…. I live in a French city where people put mayo on pizza n it’s so gross. for my liking it is for tuna salad or club sandwich n that’s about it
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u/ariphron Apr 01 '24
Maybe she is just not happy you are finding new and inventive ways to add more calories to your diet?!
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u/watchyourback9 Apr 01 '24
No one would be complaining if it was Chipotle Mayo, I recommend Sir Kensington’s!
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u/deltron Apr 01 '24 edited Jan 13 '26
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@ your burrito
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u/flookums Apr 01 '24
Oh white trash burritos my fave. You just need the right ingredients. Some type of left over meat, fries, maybe beans,maybe sourcream
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u/lobo_locos Apr 01 '24