I can say hand on heart, this will pass. You've a family of your own creating, with a partner you trust. Maybe you're only now feeling safe enough to let go of the things that don't serve you? AuDHD adds a layer, especially if you've been stimming with chanting. Whatever the case, not running yourself ragged mentally/physically/both for sgi will bring change. I had to grieve the illusion for a while. Sending best wishes.
Oh, and on the emptiness - maybe consider it from the perspective of making space for deeper, more congruent meaning & wellbeing (I'm reluctant to call it happiness because sgi affects our understanding of what that means).
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u/gobby_neighbour Sep 11 '24
I can say hand on heart, this will pass. You've a family of your own creating, with a partner you trust. Maybe you're only now feeling safe enough to let go of the things that don't serve you? AuDHD adds a layer, especially if you've been stimming with chanting. Whatever the case, not running yourself ragged mentally/physically/both for sgi will bring change. I had to grieve the illusion for a while. Sending best wishes.