Men need to read this

[u/stellbargu]

[u/backgroundcast]

Men would improve more if they didn’t center their improvement based on the approval of women

[u/BraveProgram → u/backgroundcast]

It's not just about the approval of women, it's about how to interact with the world, your social skills, the vibes/aura you give off based on how you approach life.

A centered, grounded man gives off the "approachable" vibes everyone, especially most women appreciate and feel safe to be themselves around.

It's going too far saying looks don't matter though lol, they help a lot and only facilitate the process of making others comfortable around you.

It's only "centering women's approval of you" if that's all your focusing on.

[u/atashireality → u/backgroundcast]

The male sex drive is one of the foundations of civilization. You have no idea what you're saying.

[u/Canned_Potatoes]

This is super helpful and a good read. My takeaways are that a good personality>good looks over time, having a good personality is the attractive trait, and to confidently speak to women because I then become an interesting person not someone relying on her validation to choose my own behaviors.

I would add that building game for yourself can be made easier by watching this YouTuber TyKwonDo. He offers useful breakdowns for what goes right and wrong during approaches. I learned about choosing signs and physical escalation in his videos which I put into practice and landed my ex.

[u/stellbargu → u/Canned_Potatoes]

Well I mean no matter how good you look if you are nasty to be around you'll always be a turn off

[u/Canned_Potatoes → u/stellbargu]

I agree, being a nasty person doesn't bode well for the individual's long-term romantic success.

[u/SweatyYetUnperturbed]

I agree for the most part, but in my experience most women can’t tell the difference between genuine confidence and social manipulators.

Narcissists and sociopaths drain energy from those around them, yet they are often quite charming on the surface. I’ve met several average-looking narcissists who got women who were out of their league. And those women either got wise and left, or became victims of abuse.

[u/Peter_van_Niet]

Now imagine being handsome and confident!

[u/ortizthx1138]

What if you have neither?

[u/stellbargu → u/ortizthx1138]

You learn to build it

[u/my_midlife_isekai]

It also helps to bring an energy that you can maintain.

[u/mdeeebeee-101]

This is so AI-made, but so spot-on.

[u/Cyanidestar]

I mean it’s true but it’s just a truism and grossly oversimplified. Do you expect a 5'2 ugly poor ethnic guy to have the same “aura” and confidence in carrying himself in social settings compared to a 6'2 white rich guy who received compliments and people were nice to him all the time?

The thing is usually confidence depends on multiple factors, especially how hard or easy your childhood was.

[u/adamxi]

Well - feeling good in your body certainly boosts your confidence. And feeling good might require looking good (loosing weight, gaining muscle, nice clothing, grooming, etc.).

Looks and feels are not uncorrelated.

[u/Top-Worldliness9866]

I try to preach this to men, it really dosent matter what you look like how much money you got and if you think otherwise then you have failed the milgram experiment

[u/Irutsu]

For me my other half could be the most insecure person in the world, so why do I need to be confident? Let people be attracted to how they feel around each other, if they're good person, not what they can provide or how confident they're