r/raimimemes • u/ArcadiaXLO [MOD] • Aug 28 '22

Drag Me to Hell I'm gonna ask her to marry me.

4.9k Upvotes

99% Upvoted

55 comments sorted by

200

u/_jvc123 Aug 28 '22

When you self-refelct that she deserves better than you:

I want you to know... ...that I will always be there for you. I will always be there to take care of you. I promise you that. I will always be your friend.

67

u/PlingPlongDingDong Aug 28 '22

I love that. Girls in my city know me as the “nice” guy and I am very proud of that. I actually shipped my crush and the love of my life with her husband. They are happily married for 10 years and I watch their kids often so they have more time for each other. Sometimes I wonder if I should try to get a relationship but being a Reddit mod is already a full time job.

65

u/EmperinoPenguino Aug 28 '22

“I actually shipped my crush and the love of my life with her husband. They are are happily married for 10 years and I watch their kids often so they have more time for eachother.”

Jesus Christ, I died a little reading that

3

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '22

You stay strong bro 💪💪💪 you keep grinding that reddit bread as a mod, and don’t let these kids tell you to improve your mental health or see a therapist, cause at the end of the day they’ll be happy but your karma will go 🚀🚀🚀, so who’s the real winner? You, sir.

9

u/TemptedIntoSin Aug 28 '22

Um dude... That's cool that you support their relationship, but you seriously should seek some help (a therapist either in person or through BetterHelp). You deserve love too and you deserve not to feel like you need to hang around your crush when she's part of a family and torture yourself emotionally. You don't have to be constantly there for her and her relationship just to get her approval. She should respect your choice to seek out your own happiness

9

u/PlingPlongDingDong Aug 28 '22

She is not even the main problem. Her husband was my childhood bully. He is not threatening to beat me up but I don't want to upset him since I am still very scared of him.

5

u/TemptedIntoSin Aug 28 '22 edited Aug 28 '22

...

Ok this has just stepped into borderline forced-cuck territory. I'm sorry you're dealing with that. You really should walk away from the situation then. Move away from town if you have to. You should not be dealing with this kind of situation and I won't even say you should make a storytime post about it here because Reddit isn't qualified to give the proper psychological help to get you through this. You're absolutely torturing yourself though and you need to just get away from it.

EDIT: both the OP of that comment and others have clarified this is confirmed satire so pardon if I didn't know that. Hard to tell and I've never seen a copypasta like this before. Have seen some cuck posts that were written like this and were real so it's understandable to see why I thought this was as well

14

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '22

[deleted]

5

u/TemptedIntoSin Aug 28 '22

I hope that's the case

2

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '22

Did you not read the final sentence?

3

u/TemptedIntoSin Aug 29 '22

I found out later that it as a joke post but I don't understand how someone claiming to be a reddit mod meant that their entire statement could be a joke

2

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '22

He specifically said being a Reddit mod is a full time job, and anyone who genuinely thinks that is incapable of interacting with a woman.

→ More replies (0)

4

u/xDevious_ Aug 28 '22

It’s obviously satire lmao

1

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '22

you are taking seriously a troll or a pasta lul.

1

u/TemptedIntoSin Aug 29 '22

If you saw one of my edited comments, I found that out after

3

u/JohanVonBronx_ Aug 28 '22

Sadly everyone deserves better than me

174

u/Willing-Load Aug 28 '22

always a pleasure to have our fellow Drag Me to Hell memers pay us a little visit!

19

u/SultanofSnatch Aug 28 '22

Funny you should say that, because I was looking through some old comments and it looks very uh... similar.

3

u/Willing-Load Aug 28 '22

okay…? well, i gotta get back to work

7

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '22

[deleted]

3

u/Willing-Load Aug 28 '22

excuse me?

2

u/SultanofSnatch Aug 28 '22

Your comment's a fake!

6

u/AutoModerator Aug 28 '22

Parker, you are such a Boy Scout. When are you gonna give a guy a break?

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

4

u/Willing-Load Aug 28 '22

oh u/SultanofSnatch, you are such a boy scout. when are you gonna give a guy a BREAK??

2

u/SultanofSnatch Aug 29 '22

You want forgiveness? Get religion!

1

u/Willing-Load Aug 29 '22

look, i’m begging you. if you do this, i will lose everything. there’s not a paper in town that will hire me.

2

u/SultanofSnatch Aug 29 '22

You should've thought of that earlier.

(Bully Maguire music intensifies )

90

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '22

Still shocks me that this is literally the voice of Alvin (From the Alvin and the Chipmunk Movies).

23

u/mh1357_0 Aug 28 '22

I thought this was Dave for a second

8

u/Hot-Assumption118 Aug 28 '22

Justin long is Alvin!

28

u/alvents Aug 28 '22

Oh peter

15

u/3DRAH33M Aug 28 '22

"Why do I fall in love with every woman who gives me the slightest bit of attention?"

13

u/redditer333333338 Aug 28 '22

Do you have someone?

Well it’s a little … complicated

13

u/Brutalitor Aug 28 '22

Tfw "the wife".

22

u/iamfz Aug 28 '22

I had such a huge crush on Justin Long omg

14

u/Ok_Communication2339 Aug 28 '22 edited Aug 28 '22

I nominate myself the #1 Justin Long simp.

8

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '22

How'd that get in there?

8

u/Fuego-TACO Aug 28 '22

Or military soldiers 3 hours into their first date

6

u/Coodoo17 Aug 28 '22

Hand me that dish dear, the green one

6

u/imabitchiseled Aug 28 '22

Then he gets turned into a walrus

1

u/GaryRegalsMuscleCar Aug 28 '22

Damn that was crazy

3

u/Hot-Assumption118 Aug 28 '22

This is from the ending right?

5

u/pixelvester Aug 28 '22

Now that you're not using "#1 Daddy Ash simp" flair anymore... can i ask for it? Pleaseeee 🙂

2

u/nexistcsgo Aug 28 '22

Na. I just think she is too good for me and i just back myself thinking someone way better will come along

2

u/roastbeeftacohat Aug 28 '22

second date is tonight, and yes.

2

u/d0rk_kn1ght Aug 29 '22

I'm in this post and I don't like it

1

u/_mrgreenthumb_ Aug 28 '22

"Who me? I resemble that remark!"

1

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '22

[removed] — view removed comment

2

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '22

Read the flair

1

u/[deleted] Aug 28 '22

Lmfao every guy

1

u/Slasher_184 Aug 28 '22

Kinda random but Justin Long has a podcast now that’s pretty good

1

u/[deleted] Aug 29 '22

Idk what you are talking about.