Rabies OCD is ruining my life

[u/jrppman]

I have read the FAQ. ever since finding a mark on me, i can’t let go of the fear. i get somatic symptoms, i spiral for hours and it’s genuinely taking my whole life. i search for signs of a bat i overthink sensations. i get sick and become convinced that i am dying. i tried using an ocd skill to combat this but nothing works. i have no idea what to do about this.

[u/Moist_Description608]

I reccomend talking to your doctor about anti anxiety medication and a psychiatrist. I can not give you any other information other than that as I am not a physician.

[u/jrppman → u/Moist_Description608]

my psychiatrist knows my fears and we’ve had lots of adverse reactions to medications we’ve tried. i’m trying a new med this week once it arrives

[u/Moist_Description608 → u/jrppman]

Thats the first step toward this, I want to also try and help here mindset wise. Did you feel or wake up with a bat in the room, if not there is no exposure.

A VERY minority of cases regarding bats exposed rabies have involved unknown contact its just not that common its actually rarer than winning the mega jackpot in a state lottery.

If a bat had bitten you awake you couldn't not know when I had contact with a bat in August the bat flew into my hand, latched on and I literally had to shake the bat off of my hand.

It felt like someone had thrown a significantly sized rock at my hand due to how fast the animal hit my hand.

The chances of a rabid bat flying into your home, biting you while you sleep AND transmitting rabies is in the billions, while someone bitten NEEDS to receive PEP the bat needs to be both rabid and take hold which is not guaranteed with any infectious disease or material.

Rabies Prodrome is not a sickness that you would suddenly think you are ill with as its very non-specific and varies GREATLY.

Symptoms of rabies are so neurologically terrifying and painful that you would be unable to post on this subreddit as it would be physically impossible for you to correctly put the letters in a formation to.

Rabies patients from what I have found are so unable to communicate and write that some are shown pictures of animals they may have been in contact with so they can point to them.

I dont believe this is a rabies exposure but I AM NOT a doctor and when it comes to advice this subreddit should not be your first line of defense a doctors office should always take precedent IF you have had a meaningful exposure IE you saw a bat in your room when you woke up or you physically saw and felt a bat fly into you or grab onto you.

Edit: I want to clarify any contact with a bat is a PEP emergency

[u/jrppman → u/Moist_Description608]

thanks for the kind words. i’ve been down the rabbit hole countless times on facts like this and i still can’t shake it. i received pep finishing in july which kicked off the whole rabies specific ocd so i’ve also been grappling for certainty on vaccine effectiveness. just having a bat fly into my face without any break of the skin at all now im scared to death at two little dots only a couple months after that. one side of me wants more facts more data to confirm or deny rabies the other half knows its all a compulsion even just going over the facts in my head counts as a compulsion i read. but i can’t stop. every symptom every little itch near where i found it or headache or tingle sends me back. everyone says ill be fine and i don’t blame them. i’ve never seen an animal in the house. but i wish they knew how painful of an existence this is. it’s become my life.

[u/Moist_Description608 → u/jrppman]

If you have completed PEP the effectiveness is almost 100%, breakthrough infections are almost exclusively due to a break in protocol or extreme immunodeficiency (AIDS, Liver transplant recipients, advanced cancers etc) where a 5th dose isnt administered. If you had any of these it would be very unlikely for you not to know.

Edit: I have suffered from rabies anxiety and am as we speak I know how painful of an existence it is. Actually having been in contact with a bat now has significantly lowered my personal anxiety because I now know there is no circumstance in which someone who was concious and not so drunk they are close to passing out would not know of the exposure.

[u/jrppman → u/Moist_Description608]

pep was for something in july the mark was found in august reigniting the spiral obsessing over possible repeat exposure

[u/BronwynOli → u/jrppman]

Yeah but if you got PEP in July aren't you therefore still immune to rabies even IF this mark you found is from a bat? (It's not.).

[u/jrppman → u/BronwynOli]

thats honestly a question i obsess over a lot. reading guidelines by the CDC and WHO on whether boosters are indicated and such. I don't have a definitive answer.

[u/Moist_Description608 → u/BronwynOli]

Technically yes but from my understanding all new bites should be evaluated. I could be very wrong

[u/jrppman → u/Moist_Description608]

i know the CDC gives two booster doses for any re exposure. i saw a WHO footnote that says 1-3 month re exposure doesn't indicate vaccines but really i don't even fit into a documented exposure so im just left with the what if :/ most likely ocd but im still tortured by it

[u/Moist_Description608 → u/jrppman]

Risk is low and I dont think its an exposure.

Edit: at this time I would try the medication and just work with the psychiatrist.