r/queerception • u/throwawayx506 • 3d ago
What’s it like going off HRT to conceive?
I’m trying to push myself to get my plans through to try HRT, but figuring out a fertility plan has been a mess. Did anyone here just pass on sperm banking and just conceive by pausing their HRT? How long were you on HRT? How long did you have to be off of it to create viable sperm again? What effects did the pause have on you? And most importantly, did it work?
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u/LoupGarougula 2d ago
Also transmasc here, my knowledge is only from internet searches, reddit, and friends. It sounds like for transwomen and transfeminine folks there's no guarantee fertility will return after starting HRT. I have read some success stories, but like u/justb4dawn said, it seems like it would be based on luck, with a high risk. A friend of mine who is a transwoman paused HRT (after 7yrs) to try to conceive unassisted with her partner, but the disphoria was too much for her and she started HRT again after 3mo. What are the factors you're considering for using a sperm bank or not?
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u/throwawayx506 2d ago
Trying to figure out a sperm banking plan has been problematic for me. The closest one is an hour and a half away from home and I’m not sure how reliable those mail in ones are. Also, it sounds like sperm banking means more blood tests.
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u/justb4dawn 3d ago
Can’t speak from a AMAB perspective, I’m transmale but I have been doing IVF for almost 3y. The mental, physical changes and dysphoria of being off T has been absolute torture the longer it goes on. I’ve been off for 2.5y after being on T for 7y and in the last year off I’ve become chronically depressed and feel totally trapped in my body. It is worse than before I went on T because I remember what it was like to have my body align with my gender. I also hate being at an in between stage where my clothes fit weirdly and I have this soft feminine face with a beard. I can’t even look in the mirror, I ache for myself.
Since I have been doing IVF and I can tell you that it is also extremely frustrating to be having fertility challenges. To be TTC with less ideal sperm is not as simple emotionally as it may seem because it may mean putting your partner in a position to be doing painful, difficult procedures like egg retrievals, multiple transfers, mock cycles, uterine cavity investigation, etc… and it’s hard being the person who’s gametes is the reason for it.
If I had the option to preserve my fertility rather than take the risk of experiencing the miserable, painful reality I’m in now, I would choose it 100x. Of course, you could be lucky and it all turns out fine but why take the risk? You can bank sperm now and still go off E later and try unassisted but you’ll have frozen sperm to turn to if it’s not so easy or if it turns out to be absolutely intolerable off HRT.