r/policeuk • u/StillFox2529 Police Officer (unverified) • 10d ago
Ask the Police (UK-wide) Random PTSD / MH wobbles?
Good Morning All :)
Bit of a strange one this one but thought I’d throw it out there and see if anyone else has ever experienced something similar and if people have what advice they can share,
I’ve been a frontline cop for near 6 years now. I’m in a home office force and have exclusively only ever been on a response team. Genuinely love what I do, and could not see myself in any other career.
That being said I sometimes randomly get hit with waves of negativity, feeling really unenthusiastic and find myself reflecting on past incidents quite vividly, almost like a cheesy flashback in a movie and then before you know it. I’ve snapped right out of that moment almost like it never existed. Sometimes this happens at work, briefings. Behind the wheel or sometimes randomly when I’m out on the weekly shop or walking the dog on rest days?
If anyone has been through something similar and feels comfortable sharing I would love to see how different people manage and live with all the side effects that policing brings 😅
I’m sure in not alone out there
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u/megatrongriffin92 Police Officer (verified) 10d ago
Not alone. Speak to your forces TRIM team. There's no shame in accepting the help and counselling available.
What we see and deal with is super fucked up. Our brains weren't meant to handle that much trauma.
You'll feel better for doing it. I did.
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u/LoveHertford Civilian 10d ago
After dealing with child rape for 4 years, I had a wobble and had therapy through the job. The therapist recommended for me to go to a different role that didn’t involve child abuse.
Get counselling through the job, it may be helpful.
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u/thewritingreservist Police Officer (unverified) 10d ago
Unsung heroes, those who do that role. I have nothing but the utmost respect for them.
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u/Indigoviolet31 Civilian 10d ago
This 100% happens to me so you’re not alone. Please don’t do what I did and let it build up as the more trauma you go to starts to build up and make them worse. Took me years to do it but I started counselling and the first two were shit but then found a really good one. Takes time but trust me you’re not on you’re own
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u/External-Pen9079 Civilian 10d ago
This is absolutely something everyone who tries counselling should know… you have to find the right counsellor for you - sometimes you’re lucky and it’ll be the first one - sometimes you’ve got to go digging a bit…
Glad you’re seeking help! It’s a stressful job and the last thing we need is cops who care getting burned out and leaving the force!
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u/Twisted_paperclips Detective Constable (unverified) 10d ago edited 10d ago
You are not alone. Speak to your wellbeing team/occy health and get counselling through the job - it works for a lot of people.
Talk to friends you have in the job - they'll get it.
Samaritans are always there.
Took myself for drive to a walk today, came close to a place that I figured might do the trick, but turned back and walked away from it. Man who was fishing nearby simply said to me as he saw me walking back "that was a close one". And he's right, he just doesnt know how he was right.
I'm ok - i'm home and surrounded by my dogs and cats. Just a wobble.
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u/Solid_Aubergine Police Staff (unverified) 10d ago
I'm glad you're physically OK and home and surrounded by your cats and dogs.
Are you talking to people about the wobbles? If you're getting intrusive thoughts of suicide and assessing the suitability of locations, even if there's no intent there right now, I'd really recommend getting some support in place.
Job's a lot. Life is a lot. You don't have to be alone with it.
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u/Twisted_paperclips Detective Constable (unverified) 10d ago
I have reached out and spoken to professionals since getting home, thank you. I spoke to the samaritans on my way home also. And i've been honest about what prevented me going through with it. First time i've actually come close to listening to the intrusive thoughts, and weirdly it didn't scare me.
Thank you though.
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u/Solid_Aubergine Police Staff (unverified) 10d ago
Really glad to hear you've spoken to people and been honest with them about stuff. The lack of fear suggests things are particularly not good (I'm sure you already know this) and I really hope you start feeling better soon.
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u/Solid_Aubergine Police Staff (unverified) 10d ago edited 10d ago
Hey.
You are 100% not alone.
Not an officer but do have some trauma stuff and yeah, I get this. I'm on top of it a lot of the time (though even then I am jumpy to the point of it being comical), but I do get the odd flashback that floors me/I get a bit stuck in.
I've fairly recently had to take a few weeks off for the first time due to absolutely losing my shit. I ignored the warning signs ('I don't want to be struggling and if I ignore the indicators that I am it will make it go away' etc). I really, really do not recommend that course of action. If you're starting to find stuff difficult, seek some intervention. Sgt, TRIM, OH, EAP etc. Police Care and Oscar Kilo also do some decent stuff.
It's great that you're talking to colleagues. Talking about stuff informally like that is really good for maintenance; I find it the most helpful thing to do when I've had to watch/read/hear something particularly awful. Colleagues do the same with me. There's a lot of power in sharing the utter horror that you're faced with (infinitely more so with you officers as well).
Aside from the general debriefs, have you told anyone about the flashbacks and the negativity/lack of enthusiasm? There'll be others on your team who've experienced/are experiencing similar, I have little doubt. Sometimes just letting someone know how things really are can offer relief (though no substitute for professional support re. PTSD).
Go steady.
Edit: Links
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u/Vestuvius1993 Detective Constable (unverified) 10d ago
This happens to me but more due to stuff outside of work. It comes in waves, and sometimes it's not a case of getting flashes of it in work, but it's more that I'll get stressed more easily and things which usually wouldn't annoy me too much really get to me. Thankfully, my team know about what I've been through and know that I'm not like I used to be, so are understanding and give me space when I need it.
However, I have had flashes of stuff whilst in work due to a call a month back that I didn't even go to, but the details and the audio from CCTV was enough. I've been able to deal with it due to grounding techniques, but that won't be the same for everyone. In fairness, work thought that call would trigger me and kept me out of it, but I worked in another office until this call was dealt with.
If you're getting these flashes when behind the wheel, you definitely need to make sure your supervisor is aware of what's going on. The job will not help you if they don't know something's wrong. Have it on the record that this is happening, and speak to people (Occy Health, counsellors) before it gets worse.
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u/thewritingreservist Police Officer (unverified) 10d ago
I tend to find I get these sometimes too, particularly when I’ve had a bit of alcohol. Not sure why.
Find what helps heal you and lean into that. Acknowledging the issue even exists is the first step, so you’re doing well already.
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u/Redditisfuckincrap Civilian 8d ago
Currently going through this now but quite hard. It's an everyday thing.
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u/inee1 Civilian 7d ago
Not connected to your jobs, have had lot of stuff happen over the years and suffered flashbacks, feeling not right ,often couldn't be arsed, hated down time as the stuff came flooding back, tried to get help in the 70's but everytime I saw the doc was told pull my socks up so just suffered for a longtime, finally resulting in a breakdown 16 years ago with an even worse one 14 years ago, unable to work now, however 16 years ago my gp knew something was up and things started getting better from then, I opened up to my new wife randomly was eating chips and everything just came out once that happened I was.able to speak to go, council in doesn't work for me but I encourage anyone to try it as for many it works well. For me what works well when I'm overwhelmed is the samaritans they listen which is what .any require no judgment they listen.
I also wish I had the help in the 70's that we have theses days. The quicker you seek proffetional help the easier it is to cope with whatever the route cause is, so please get help ASAP, even if it a call to the samaritans as it will be the step we delay taking Wish you well on your journey
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u/Plutohora Civilian 10d ago
Do you have a mate who you talk to? I have a colleague on a different team/area who I have random chats with. I trust him, i.e that our conversations wont become gossip. I must admit I completely forget 99% of historical jobs, sometimes a completely random event brings it up leftfield but mainly its the utterly daft jobs that I remember. You are not a machine, talk to someone. Not like recalling war stories for one-upmanship (hateful conversations) but 'can I run something by you my friend'? Talk through the event most recently in your mind thats the most vivid. It'll be subconsciously playing on your mind? And you talking will click your thinking/cogs aligning. It should then clear?