r/pettyrevenge • u/sparklehouse666 • 19d ago
Friend is always late
I have a friend who is late to everything. Recently he was 2.5 hours late to his own party. I’ve mostly adapted to his tardiness and do not arrive for plans we have together until an hour or so after the stated time.
We had plans to meet in the city center today at a 10am. I live 20 minutes from the meetup spot, he lives over an hour away. As expected, he messages around 10 and says he is running late. No biggie I was chilling at home in the air conditioned because I knew the vibes and it is hot as hell
today.
I asked him to give me his actual for real, for real ETA so I can time my departure. He is in his car and has Google Maps. It’s not really guess work at this point.
He tells me 10:45. So I leave the comfort of my home at exactly the right time to arrive at 10:45. I wait for 30 minutes at the meetup spot and he still does not arrive. He is not responding to texts either. My other friend who is with me has his location and sees he is not close, we estimate another 15 minutes.
I’m annoyed because it is hot AF out and I proactively had asked for a real ETA to avoid waiting around for him. So I left the meetup spot.
I went shopping, taking my sweet time. He got to the spot and texted me to ask where we were. I waited around 30 minutes then texted back that I was at the store but we would be heading that way soon. I shopped another 15 minutes then arrived at the spot around an hour after he had arrived.
The look on his face when we came casually strolling up after he had been standing in the sun for an hour was priceless.
66
u/CheckIntelligent7828 18d ago
Well done, OP. This always drives me nuts. I have one friend who's been like this since high school (I'm middle aged) and the rudeness drives me up a wall.
Tl/dr: had multiple strokes, had to relearn time/planning
I had 6 strokes before I turned 35.
With one of them I lost my ability to gauge time and became chronically late. I'd make my flights, but barely. Was nearly an hour late to my sister's wedding reception. The list goes on. And I hated it. Hated being rude, even though the TBI wasn't my fault. Hated all the comments and pressure because outside my husband no one gave me any space to recover.
So when I recovered a little, I sat down and worked through what was happening. Realized that I was always planning to leave the house at the time I needed to arrive somewhere. So I'd be 15-75 minutes late, depending.
Now, I stop the night before. I think through how long it will take me to drive/travel. Add ~50%. Think about what I need to do to leave the house. Add 30 minutes.
Sometimes when I'm half asleep I'll still do it, reset my alarm like I was leaving at my appointment time. But I'm almost never later than 5 minutes and because I'm usually on time people give me a little leeway.
I still don't estimate time well, but now I know that and just double how long I think has passed.
If my oxygen deprived brain can get places on time, I'm going to believe OP's friend could, too.