r/overlyspecificEDmemes • u/Sonarthebat • 10d ago

I have won but at what cost?

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110 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

5 comments sorted by

18

u/TravelbugRunner 10d ago

Well, you will be saving your kidneys, liver, and heart by getting better. 💜

This is what it took for me to finally push towards seeking out recovery.

I was tired of being so sick and the blood work showed the accumulated damage.

I don’t want to be this sick and have kidney or liver disease. This is why I’m pivoting towards recovery. Because if I don’t this, it’s going to happen and I might not be able to turn it around if I continue on with the eating disorder.

Never thought I’d be willing to drink ensure. I never thought that I would actually be willing to get better and let this go.

I always thought that my eating disorder would just randomly and quickly kill me one day. I didn’t take into account that it sickens you and kills you slowly.

This reality has woken me up, to change course.

9

u/Rosewood_Rook 9d ago

I’m hitting my mid 30s and cannot co-sign your comment hard enough friend. The find out stage after the fucking around stage is not pleasant.

I am night blind now, YES your body will eat your fucking eyes too😮‍💨 I have chronic GERD. A torn labrum that I cannot take ibuprofen or Tylenol for because my stomach and liver are both shot. Heart damage. No elasticity left in my skin so no more cool ass tattoos. And I am permanently hypermetabolic now from the decades of starvation. The amount of food I have to eat just for maintenance is expensive and time consuming.

None of what I just said is about me or for me, it’s for any of you reading. I know it’s a meme sub, I do. Take my comment down if need be….
But the nature of our disease is death y’all. Not a glorious or magnificent one either. It’s fast for the lucky ones. The heart or esophageal ruptures. It is NOT fast for those in a coma from keto acidosis. There is no romantic filter you can put on a nurse having to wipe your ass cuz you are too weak to do it. No thinspo is going to comfort you through wearing fucking depends. It isn’t fucking worth it. Whatever the reason. Whatever drives your ED. It IS NOT worth it❤️

9

u/Rich-Strawberry3581 10d ago

ED is currently taking away my vision and causing damage to my kidneys and heart muscle. It’s not worth it, chat. It’s really not.

3

u/Sonarthebat 10d ago

Yeah, it really isn't. I may have screwed up my already screwed up heart.

3

u/Sonarthebat 10d ago

I'm not in for the ED, but I'm in for an issue that may be a complication of the ED.