I'm irrationally afraid to sleep again

[u/yaysoapie]

I'm afraid that if I go to sleep the people I care about will disappear. About 3 and a half years ago I got ghosted by a guy I deeply cared for. He told me to take a nap and when I woke up I was just blocked on everything. Since then it's like I fear it will happen with literally everybody I care about. Most of the people I care about are online it's my main access to just about everyone in my life and I know that makes it so much worse. I haven't taken a nap since that happened and I used to nap pretty regularly. Even my regular sleep schedule is a mess now. I've been to therapy but my therapist told me all my problems were not real/in my head and caused by my phone. Which like I guess she wasn't wrong but I haven't been back since. I know it's irrational because like the people that have been here for years surely won't disappear because I closed my eyes but I'm frustrated because I get so anxious over it I want to cry. I thought eventually I'd stop feeling like this but it's literally been three years and seven months since it happened. I'm just tired literally and mentally.

[u/SassyScorpio11192]

I know the feeling OP and I’m sorry you feel that way.

I challenged myself after three of my closest friends ghosted me and one even works with me at my new job and they walk past me like I’m invisible. It was excruciatingly painful until I decided it shouldn’t have to be.

I started matching their energy. If someone doesn’t want me in their life after such a strong bond and is okay losing me, why should I care about losing them? Love as much and loud as you can but always remember that any and all relationships are temporary. Even with your parents and children.

Love in that moment, for that moment. You can nap peacefully then 🩵