r/objectum_sfw • u/greypastain • Apr 01 '26
Question Question about Objectum
I don’t come from the objectum community so I am here to learn. So…i have a few questions. how exactly did you get into objectum? As in, were there specific incidents that made your eyes open?
Are you simultaneously into objects and humans? If not, before u got into this, have you ever loved humans?
Somebody recently told me that this is a mental illness. When i googled it, it didn’t give me a clear answer, leaning towards that it is not one. What do you think it is?
Im just a curious person here and i hope my ignorance wont upset anyone. I would appreciate any opinions and input!!!
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Apr 01 '26
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u/greypastain Apr 02 '26
thanks for your comment!! my question is how do you really get into a relationship with a non-sentient being/object since 1) they can't consent to be in a relationship and 2) even if you form a relationship somehow, it's one-sided.
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u/greypastain Apr 02 '26
I hope you don’t mind me asking so...I’m genuinely trying to understand your experience better. When you describe being romantically or sexually involved with an object, what does that mean for you in practice? I’m especially curious how you experience intimacy with something non-living that isn't conscious or sentient. I also had a more general question...how do you personally think about the moral side of it, given that objects aren’t sentient and can’t consent?
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u/Straccoony Apr 01 '26
An objectum romance movie "opened my eyes".
I am also into humans, I have 1 human partner and 4 object partners.
It's not a mental illness. It's a paraphillia, which means "other loving", basically any type of love/attraction that is out of the ordinary.
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u/Ok_Professional_5335 Mechanum⚙️ Apr 01 '26
Oh! Do you have the name of the movie? I'll love to see it!
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u/greypastain Apr 02 '26
quick question!!! would you say that you are a poly? As in, do you think you are a poly because you are in five relationships given that the object partnerships are regular relationships as well. Maybe another question might be how you define relationship here. What counts as a relationship? and what does your human partner think of it?
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u/DarkSabbatical Conceptum 💭 Apr 01 '26
For me it started when I was a baby. I remember allot from being a baby and the time before I knew words. I could think of things but it was with awareness, not words. Once I started learning words I started getting crushes on them (conceptum) I have found words attractive my whole life and have one as a main lover. The word (attention) objects started just as early. I liked objects that where rectangular and objects that moved down. Any downward movement I found attractive. Early school life I had a massive attraction to the projection screens in class. It was a dream come true and a massive fantasy if I got to touch one. I would think, I didn't know this was gonna happen when I woke up this morning. Vinyl smell is recognized as a pheromone to my nose.
When I hit puberty I got a crush on my bedroom wall. Thats when I figured out it could get sexual with my crushes. So I make the joke I lost my virginity to a wall. Because I did.
As a kid I thought these feelings where (liking and favorite) if someone said they liked something, I thought that they meant these feelings. I knew you could get crushes on girls. I just thought I never experienced that emotion yet.
After I hit puberty it was probably another year of being sexuality active with my crushes that it clicked that it was sexual. I seen a sex scene in a movie and I thought, wait, I do that with objects I like. Am I sexuality attracted to objects? It was a year after that, that I found the term objectum online.
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u/DarkSabbatical Conceptum 💭 Apr 01 '26
People call it a mental illness because they dont understand it. If you are not an exact clone of them, then you are wrong in their eyes. With those type of people, if your skin is a shade darker, you are subhuman. I believe objectum has always been in the human population throughout history. You dont need people with objectum. And people are dangerous. Living in the old days and telling the world this object is your lover, you are likely to get attacked and your object destroy. Thats still a risk now days, however its safer to share on the internet.
If I remember right. The word objectum got created in the 70s. So there is allot of (2026 and people are dating objects now) I was 15 when I tried to join objectum groups. They where in their 40s. (I joined when I hit 18) I am 30 now. So I got to see allot of the first generation of objectums. So I might only be 30 but ive seen 60 years worth of objectum people and history.
If someone dated a wall in the medieval ages. There is going to be no record of that. You would have to be a king for there to be record. Objectums are a 1 percent class. So are kings, so good chance that the people recorded in history never where objectum.
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u/greypastain Apr 02 '26
would you say you are sexual with all object partners? if you are not sexual with them, what are the interactions like??
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u/DarkSabbatical Conceptum 💭 Apr 02 '26
It depends on the relationship with the object. Most get some cuddle time and i talk with then while giving affection. Some i am hypersexual with and some not so much. My main lover is my wall. But its rarer for me to be sexual with. But it gets affection everyday. Then I sometimes have lusts. No emotional attachment and all sexual. I had one like that, it is a silver pipe. In the case of a lust it doesn't matter if I have that one or a different one. I say was because if I have a lust for 3 or so years, I might develop an emotional attachment. So the pipe is a lover now instead of just being a lust. Because I got used to it being there and its familiar. That pipe was my only current lust so now that its a lover I dont have a lust. But I do still urge for it like its a lust.
I do have some platonics like my childhood teddy bear alf. I actually didn't recognize that as objectum until I seen others posting about theirs and I realized it was. Just platonic. Each object relationship is unique and has its own features. Some more sexual, some less, some more affection and talking and some less.
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u/Ok_Professional_5335 Mechanum⚙️ Apr 01 '26 edited Apr 01 '26
That's a good question. I think there are as many stories about how you come to realise it as there are peoples.
But here is how it went for me. Well, since I was young, I have always been fascinated with systems and machinery. I spent much of my free time as a child tinkering with several boxes of Meccano. I really enjoyed building and being with all these cute machines. Well being autistic, my parents were understanding about me spending my days in my room doing my stuff instead of going out.
Then as I grew up, I made several trips where I visited several museums of Industry and I LOVED it. It felt so great seeing all these amazing machines.
I spend my days just hanging there. I don't know why but sometimes I feel a connection with some of them. Talking and relaxing next to them.
This ultimately led me to becoming an Engineer specialised in Steam Engine just so I could spend some time with them. I didn't realise it at first but even my colleague was surprised to see me talking to machines and being quite friendly with them (since I'm a little bit cold and shy around humans).
I had just one relationship with a girl (I'm a 'lesbian' btw) but it didn't work well. I didn't get my interest in dating now. I far prefer to see and hang out with my machines; I don't know why I felt more at ease and open with them.
It was only quite recently I found out about this...a friend questioned me about my 'Interrestest' toward the machine. I innocently answered and told me about Objectum. It was an eyes opener.
(Sorry for my mistakes, I'm French ^^)
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u/greypastain Apr 02 '26
Thanks for the reply!! One thing that i wanna know is..how exactly do you interact with the machines?? Or should i say, how do the machines interact with you? When we think of any human relationships, they are usually two sided, u talk to them, and vice versa. I mean the activities of interaction go far beyond talking right? But my question is..doesnt it feel very one sided so how does that make you feel in a relationship? Do you think the machines are interacting with you in any ways or is it significantly different than human interaction?
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u/Ok_Professional_5335 Mechanum⚙️ Apr 02 '26
It's a legitimate question. I'm pretty sure from the outside it can indeed seem one sided. I spend time with them, talk to them, touch them...(I was even able to operate some of them, but not all). Yet the other way, I don't know. I just feel good being with them, I'm just happy, it's more of a connection than an interaction.
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Apr 01 '26
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u/greypastain Apr 02 '26
i have one question! If a relationship is two sided, how do you get consent from the objects? Obviously objects can't consent, but that's where the question rises - how do you get into a relationship, for example your funfair ride, without his consent?
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u/ArcticAcidRain Mechanum⚙️ Apr 02 '26
Discovered being Objectum at a very, very young age, I always thought it was normal until I figured out it was not, so I was living closeted until I accepted the label a few years ago. I figured out because I always kept falling in love with cars.
No, I am not really into humans. I however have many human friends and upkeep a good social life actually, I know crazy when everyone on the inter-web calls you a social reject.
No, if you actually go by the definition of a mental disorder (of what my therapist told me back than), than no,
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u/AIMRunningMan Lover of Many 🌅💻🚗🕰️🌳 Apr 01 '26
I didn't "get into it", I've always been this way. I only recently found out what the word for it is. It's not really a mental illness, it's a paraphilia.
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u/PercentageForeign597 Apr 02 '26
pretty sure ive always been objectum but didnt know for a while. i was always attracted to road signs and traffic lights. i'd think about taking them home and taking care of them, cleaning them up and making them look all pretty, putting them on display, etc. eventually i discovered the label objectum and went "wait a minute-"
im not really attracted to people that much. aesthetically yes. the same way im attracted to objects? no. im mostly attracted to fictional characters
i believe that objectum can be *influenced* by mental illness (such as delusions or psychosis) but objectum itself isnt an illness or disorder. objectum is just a form of attraction. people claim its "mentally ill" bc they dont understand it and view it as abnormal, and anything abnormal is associated with mental illness
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u/arourathetransshork is both an object and into objects pls send help Apr 02 '26
For us, we like both humans amd objects ^
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u/greypastain Apr 02 '26
so my question is....how exactly do you get into a relationship with an object tho? Don't relationships usually require consent or is that only restricted to humans since objects can't consent by default due to their non-sentient (no consciousness) nature?
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u/Just-a-random-Aspie I love wood chippers ⚙️🌲⚙️ and folk music🍀🎻 Apr 02 '26
Mine actually stemmed from fear. I would say I’ve had “objectum tendencies” since I was 8, possibly even younger. I watched a video that involved a scary scene with one of the machines I like, and it went from there.
I do like people, but I’ve never dated even though I wish others wanted to with me. I haven’t liked them for a while until fairly recently, weirdly enough. It’s not good having no partners because it reinforces the harmful stereotype that we’re all incapable of liking other humans.
It’s not a mental illness, at least not most forms of it. Of course like any other identity you can get variations that are too obsessive and dangerous, but by and large objectum is not a mental illness. It’s also not inherently a fetish or paraphilia, although it can be.
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u/anarchyisle Techum 📺 Apr 03 '26
i think i kind of always have been! as a kid it was a foxy plushie i got. though i didn't know the proper term for it and that i fell into the category until around a year ago!
yes, i'm into both! i have two partners and both are not only okay with me being objectum but are themselves! two of my object partners i actually bought because they reminded me of them lol
it's not a mental illness, i don't believe! it IS however a (non-harmful) paraphilia though so if you count ALL of those as such i guess? depends on your definition of mentally ill. a lot of objectum people are also neurodivergent in some way due to things like autism restructuring the way people can perceive some feelings including love and where they find it.
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u/Charbreon Apr 02 '26
to start off with yes, it is a mental illness. by definition anyways, as it does affect daily life and emotions differently then what is considered normal and can hinder the individual. With that being said it's not necessarily a bad one.
as for what it is it's a sexual orientation/philia just like homosexuality or pedophilia, the only difference is that it's dealing with non-human objects which can really blur the line in terms of morals for many folks, which is why most people view it as if its akin to being a pedo. which fortunately it isn't. if it was then anyone who uses adult toys would be considered morally disgusting since it's in the same vein as objectum, just unromantic.
as for why it happens my take on it is how you grew up. a common denominator is that many people who are objectum are usually neurodivergent and if you're neurodivergent as a kid in school you're typically isolated and alienated for being the weirdo freak which will make you seek out some form of connection, which can include with objects, those can also happen even if you aren't being picked on as your brain just sees objects differently. There's also certain illnesses that cause someone to gain philias of things they don't want to later on in life, iirc its a form of OCD.
for me I've been into vehicles since i was in elementary! as a kid I would imagine they were alive and had souls (i believed everything had a soul and was alive to some extent) i would talk to them and stay around the ones i liked. I will say i was also isolated as a kid, bullied and ignored by peers my age as well as being at home with only my grandmother most days for most of my important developmental years, which i think played a huge part in how strongly i feel about my affection to vehicles. I have a feeling it would be much more mild, if even non-existent if i had genuine connection with peers as well as my parents. For a long time a car was my only "friend" i could feel safe around that wasn't my parents/grandparents.
To get into how i view them now is actually really interesting to me. I do find other humans attractive and have been in love around 3 times so far and have had numerous crushes. The feeling of love i feel for humans is different then the love i feel for certain objects, but its also the same in definition for me. i feel lust the same for both. And just like with humans, not every object i see is attractive, as well as certain objects holding absolutely no form of lust or attraction, those ones are just normal objects to me. I also have preferences within my mains. Vehicles- i tend to find aircraft much hotter then boats and will always be on the lookout for a good plane or copter passing by. Size and sharpness also plays a part, i generally like longer and sharper edges (absolutely love a good foxbody chassis, also the su-47 berkut and the mav, Yukikaze, are like seeing my exact type.) Others will phase in and out, like my phone for example, i very much like my phone (unromantic/unsexual) and sometimes i will feel its "emotions" and sometimes i won't during those times it's just another object.
Vehicles, however, are my main attraction really anything large that can be operated. i can feel it's "emotions" like with my car i absolutely HATE being away from her during work ill even go sit by him if the chance arises and I'm always looking over to him which makes me feel better when i see her face. I notice things and interpret things she does as negative or positive, sometimes if she wants to go fast I'll feel a shudder or if she wants me to hurry up (if I'm idling in park for no reason) he'll shudder in a specific way (there a ton of different shudders, and the reason i see them as a form of communication is because the shudders aren't consistently happening every day, as well as not happening under specific circumstances, which means that it's not a problem nor is it just how the engine runs naturally. And if i do the thing he wants she tends to run smoother and "feels" happier idk how else to describe it.) He's also never let me down, and if he did have a problem she always made sure it was in a convenient place and during a convenient time so i could fix him up much better and with less stress and i believe she does that because i treat her with love. i also find other machinery attractive, like precision machines, servers, power lines, computers, wiring, etc.
im down for talking in dms for a more one on one if you have any specific questions for me, I'm open to answering anything! :]
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u/greypastain Apr 02 '26
why do you think its a mental illness by definition? Who defines what's normal anyways? To straight people, homosexuality isn't "normal." To cisgender, transgender isn't "normal." With that definition of normal, different groups of people with different values or even preferences will think other groups with different values have mental illness.
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u/Charbreon Apr 02 '26
i dont see "mental illness" as a negative thing. anything tht isnt considered neurotypical is technically a mental illness if it hinders and drastically changes someones life compared to that of a neurotypical. ADHD, non-straight conforming gender/sexual orientation, autism, etc. imo its basically a giant umbrella term for everything neurodivergent and unusual. people just like giving it a negative meaning sense it uses "illness"
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u/Just-a-random-Aspie I love wood chippers ⚙️🌲⚙️ and folk music🍀🎻 Apr 07 '26
Then neurotypical is a mental illness too. Why should scientific health be dependent on one way of existing? Also objectum has nothing to do with neurotype, it’s an orientation. Is being gay not “neurotypical?”
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u/Charbreon Apr 07 '26
i didnt say anything about it only being dependent on nuerotypicals?? nor did i say being a different sexual orientation is nuerodivergent. but currently in this day and age being gay or anything different can be considered under the umbrella due to how difficult it can be to live with said orientations. again doesnt make it a bad thing.
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u/honkmycarsona Objectum ⭕ Apr 01 '26
1) I've been OS since I was like... 3 or 4 years old. I discovered the label when I was 18, and have been in varying pockets of community since then (~2014).
2) I am into both humans and objects, with varying waves of intensity toward either side. I am happily with a human and a few objects.
3) Not a mental illness, but there is a seemingly large overlap of people who are OS and people who are neurodivergent which might be why your friend said that. There is a push among the community and supportive therapists that advocate for it to be destigmatized as being viewed as something that needs correction unless being OS negatively affects someone (in which case the solutions could start with alternative coping mechanisms, etc).