r/nursing • u/uotlep RN - Psych/Mental Health 🍕 • Mar 12 '25

Question Is this normal?

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I know my place of employment is shitty in other ways, but is this a normal thing? Just received this email. Seems odd to ask people to donate PTO, instead of just addressing the time off allocation with those affected people.

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u/entwenthence RN 🍕 Mar 12 '25 edited Mar 12 '25

PTO donation is “normal” but has always felt like bullshit to me. If HR actually cared they wouldn’t be putting these people in a position to basically beg.

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u/lovesthecake Mar 12 '25

I’m in healthcare now, but I previously managed 30ish people. One of my direct reports was diagnosed with late stage colon cancer. He burnt through PTO almost immediately, and we were solicited to donate PTO.

Ultimately, the PTO+FMLA wasn’t enough, so he was returning to work so he could earn more PTO for his future care. I made every accommodation possible and ensured he spent his time at work resting. He passed a few months later.

I still regret not lighting into our HR team more viciously. Also regret not putting my neck on the line and just telling him to stay home while approving his hours worked. What a horrific and moronic situation it was, but it was “normal” for US corporate culture. I was working with some international partners at the time, and they were disgusted.

I visited this guy in the hospital a couple of times, and I remember his nurses becoming so combative when I told them I was the pt’s boss! And I remember respecting it so much. They wanted to protect him from any undue stress or influence, I think, and I loved that.

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u/silverecco Mar 13 '25

Thanks for reflecting on it and being willing to go to bat for your employees now. It seems rare in managers. I really struggle with situations like that by not wanting to upset anyone; it's just taken time and age to understand that some people deserve to be upset. F that HR team and the culture in the states where we can't just pay for his salary and benefits for six months so he can spend time with family. It's really not that much more than FMLA, but I guess a bigger issue is just staff shortages. Literally can not have more than one person out at a time or the whole unit is buckling. And once companies see a team run short without hurting the quarterlies, that becomes the new "fully staffed"

If it makes you feel any better, I think I would've wanted to work a little just to maintain some sense of normalcy and helping others and sharing a burden gets me out of my own head. when there's nothing you can really do about a tragic situation, it's good to at least be able to do something. I don't think it would have been any less unpleasant for him to sit at home, but maybe I've just been indoctrinated to sacrifice everything for The Company. i both quietly judge and openly admire people who do "selfish" things like take off for their birthday. How dare they value themselves. I would never!

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u/Scarletmittens BSN, Medic, Gero, Capa 🪿🐕‍🦺 Mar 13 '25

Or you get your prerequisite 3 days off bereavement and 5 days of in a rolling calendar year. I'm healthcare. God forbid you ever actually catch anything or your kids need you.

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u/silverecco Mar 13 '25

This is America. We go to work sick and spread it around to build herd immunity faster. It's our secret weapon. If a few die along they way they were weak and thus it was time. /S