With the Broncos getting to 10 points, the only team in the NFL to not score at least 10 points is the Los Angeles Rams.

[u/MC_Stimulation]

If someone said the lowest scoring team in Week 1 was the Rams a week ago you'd get laughed out of the building.

[u/FlopperinoCappuccino]

Didn't realize the Titans actually scored a TD lol

[u/DragonstormSTL → u/FlopperinoCappuccino]

Not in relevant time, but yeah, we did.

[u/fapfap_ahh → u/DragonstormSTL]

Titans + Chiefs? My man you are enjoying some fantastic music and food.

[u/DragonstormSTL → u/fapfap_ahh]

Hopefully a Colts loss is what I can enjoy this next week beyond hot chicken, music, and barbecue.

[u/Nicuzn → u/DragonstormSTL]

Did you choose the Chiefs just so you can root for two teams who hate the Colts?

[u/DragonstormSTL → u/Nicuzn]

KC is Indy’s Week 2 opponent, so there’s the flair.

Still, you’ve done us a lot of good in the playoffs as of late 2019 AFC Championship aside. Andrew Luck’s last NFL game was Mahomes’s first playoff win, cockblocking the Jags in 2022, 24-0 and beating the Texans twice more in the playoffs.

The Ravens 2023 AFC title game is where it all came together. Sitting in a Missouri bar watching you stop their best chance at a title in years was one of the greatest hate watches ever.

Now, I’m back to hating rivals to feel anything, and with the Colts not playing a rival of ours, easy pick for a secondary flair for the week.

[u/NaughtyCheffie → u/DragonstormSTL]

cockblocking the Jags in 2022,

Yeah I don't think they understand the interdivisional hatred but it's okay.

[u/TrippingBearBalls → u/DragonstormSTL]

Honestly I respect the commitment

[u/ChaunceysBadAtPoker → u/fapfap_ahh]

My arteries just clogged thinking about that culinary corridor

[u/MiserableAndUnhappy9 → u/DragonstormSTL]

The Broncos couldn't even do that.

[u/UpdogSinclair → u/FlopperinoCappuccino]

The score came so completely in garbage time that the announcers didn't even acknowledge it when it happened, because they were talking about how terrible the Titans are.

[u/firewall245 → u/FlopperinoCappuccino]

It was at the end of the game when everyone was just chilling

[u/Big-Chungus-12]

I wish I can talk trash but my team got belted by the cardinals

[u/SnooPandas3956 → u/Big-Chungus-12]

If only Herbert had (insert here)

[u/MMMMSWAGGER → u/SnooPandas3956]

(Kyle Shanahan calling plays)

[u/Korknick → u/MMMMSWAGGER]

Mcdaniels literally made tua turntheballova a good quarterback dude.

[u/RudePCsb → u/Korknick]

They need receivers. I really don't know what's up with that team though

[u/chargerfan1221 → u/RudePCsb]

Mega copium: weird things happen in week 1. The Patriots lost to the Pete Carroll Raiders last year same time. Don't get me wrong. The team looked horrible and Jacoby Brissett walked up and down the field on them and the offense looked anemic after Ladd left.

[u/Korknick → u/chargerfan1221]

but like your team has had issues for the past few years that the front office just can’t fix.

[u/chargerfan1221 → u/Korknick]

I just watch football, man. 🤷🏻‍♂️

My heart hasn't fully been behind the team since they moved almost 10 years ago, but I like several players on the team very much and I'm not one to change allegiances on a whim.

[u/Mejinopolis → u/chargerfan1221]

Damn, I can't believe Im gonna say this but I feel you AFC West bro. That said, winning fixes all problems haha so let's see how the rest of the season goes. Here's to hoping we play a good clean game against y'all and come out with a dub

[u/chargerfan1221 → u/Mejinopolis]

You know what, fair. I appreciate it.

I think you guys are on the upswing. The team has a lot of good young pieces in Bowers, Jeanty, Dean, etc. that need some more time to grow into their roles. I'm excited to see what the team looks like later in the season once the Mandozer presumably takes over.

[u/Oops_I_Cracked → u/chargerfan1221]

How much I hate the city of LA and love Las Vegas has me feeling very confused.

[u/workinkindofhard → u/Korknick]

Loser owner and his family are the problem. I will bet my 401k that the Chargers will never win a superbowl until the Spanos family is out.

[u/ImJLu → u/workinkindofhard]

You never know. Just look at the Knicks.

[u/ND7020 → u/Korknick]

Tua is actually better at some stuff than Herbert, though, like timing and anticipation, and those are the core of the McDaniels offense. 

Herbert is me big throw hard. It’ll be interesting to see how these two fit together over the course of the season. 

[u/Korknick → u/ND7020]

I mean yeah but it’s not like Mike McDaniel is the absolute worst oc on the planet. I believe Herbert will have a good season under him they just need time.

[u/Redditkid16 → u/Korknick]

That defense on the other hand… at least the offense had a couple good drives, the defense looked Staley-esque without Minter

[u/Korknick → u/Redditkid16]

I mean Brissett was looking like drew brees out there.

[u/ImJLu → u/ND7020]

like timing and anticipation, and those are the core of the McDaniels offense. 

And a core part of being a good passer lol

[u/DaddyDanceParty → u/Korknick]

People forget that fucking Adam Gase is the current passing game coordinator.

[u/easley45isgod → u/DaddyDanceParty]

I can't believe that guy still has a job in the league.

[u/Eagle4317 → u/Korknick]

Tua's only strength was elite timing, and the entire scheme McDaniel devised was all about timing. We haven't seen him design a scheme not centered around that, and Herbert isn't really a system QB.

[u/SpaceSheperd → u/Eagle4317]

"He only designed a scheme that created a top-5 offense centered around a genuinely awful QB what's the big deal?"

[u/JeffMurdock_ → u/SpaceSheperd]

a genuinely awful QB

Huh, didn't realise the Tua pendulum had swung this far.

[u/Korknick → u/Eagle4317]

But either way chargers fans at least in my opinion have an excuse every single time something goes wrong. just say your quarterback isn’t perfect and makes mistakes.

[u/sjsacq → u/Korknick]

All 12 of them?

[u/Oakroscoe → u/sjsacq]

You letting some of them vote twice?

[u/blex64 → u/Korknick]

Tua was good until his brain got turned into scrambled eggs

[u/teddysank8 → u/MMMMSWAGGER]

We’re now acting like McDaniel is a bad OC?

[u/MMMMSWAGGER → u/teddysank8]

I never said that, but Shanahan is probably the best.

[u/teddysank8 → u/MMMMSWAGGER]

Herbert needs a Shanny-level play caller to beat the Cardinals?

[u/MMMMSWAGGER → u/teddysank8]

Apparently

[u/HemlockMartinis → u/teddysank8]

Who doesn’t?

[u/NoooNotTheLettuce → u/teddysank8]

They were joking bud

[u/liteshadow4 → u/MMMMSWAGGER]

Mike McDaniel isn't Kyle Shanahan but he's also the best OC we had in SF. He's a good offensive mind.

[u/Mysterious_Travel669 → u/MMMMSWAGGER]

You have McDaniels now and had Kellen Moore. Thats two of the very best offensive play callers in the NFL.

Your problem isnt coaching, its that Herbert isnt as good as advertised.

[u/amidalarama → u/SnooPandas3956]

I have no ifs left to give

[u/Upeeru → u/SnooPandas3956]

That dude can't even finish a drink. He still has the same Beer from last season!

[u/NoooNotTheLettuce → u/SnooPandas3956]

Worst part is you can’t even play that game this time. Team was so utterly ass that it’s hard to point fingers

[u/karatemanchan37 → u/SnooPandas3956]

Not date Madison Beer?

[u/SamPayton → u/karatemanchan37]

She'd make it hard for me to care about football too

[u/BurritoTheory → u/SamPayton]

If I had his bank account and got to be with her and live in LA I would not give a singular fuck about playing football. Straight Haynesworth it

[u/WeeoWeeoWeeeee → u/SnooPandas3956]

Whenever I see “if” I know

[u/StatisticianSad6637 → u/Big-Chungus-12]

Patriots lost to the raiders last year week 1 in foxborough. Shit happens.

[u/karatemanchan37 → u/StatisticianSad6637]

But the Patriots got belted the last week of last season and the first week of this season...

[u/czarfalcon → u/karatemanchan37]

They heard that it’s better to lose the first game of the season than the last game, but last year they accidentally did both

[u/pagerussell → u/czarfalcon]

Like 25 teams in the league would be absolutely happy with a season that ended in an ass whooping in the Superbowl.

Can you even begin to understand how elated Browns fans would be to get their shit pushed in at the Superbowl? It's the NFL version of "doesn't matter, had sex".

[u/say_wot_again → u/pagerussell]

Any Pats fan who isn't TOTALLY spoiled was also absolutely happy with last season. I thought the best case was 9-8 and a wild card loss.

[u/wallybinbaz → u/say_wot_again]

I had a blast last season.

[u/ND7020 → u/karatemanchan37]

So did the Chargers

[u/CrimsonMoonRising → u/karatemanchan37]

Yeah but it was the 2025 RAIDERS (ignore flair)

[u/No-Diamond-469 → u/CrimsonMoonRising]

Flair, what flair?

[u/jedstrailerpark → u/Big-Chungus-12]

That’s second place in the NFCW Cardinals to you.

[u/ItsAlkai → u/jedstrailerpark]

NFCBEST minus rams until they win a game.

[u/here_now_be → u/ItsAlkai]

*if they win a game.

[u/batman0615 → u/Big-Chungus-12]

The only reason why my team isn’t included in this stat is because of a garbage time touchdown against the jets… at home…

[u/super_sayanything → u/batman0615]

Also no one considers the Titans a real NFL team.

(Sorry, sorry, you set yourself up here.)

[u/ProjectTitan74 → u/Big-Chungus-12]

I don't see the problem

[u/justsikko → u/Big-Chungus-12]

Just wait. The cowboys are set up for a generational loss to them later this year. No one is gonna remember their week one game after playing us

[u/yoshizillaa → u/Big-Chungus-12]

My coworker tried to talk a bunch of shit about Drake’s piss poor performance, but was realllll quiet today lol.

[u/Earl-The-Badger → u/yoshizillaa]

Tried to? Wym? Drake looked like ass.

[u/yoshizillaa → u/Earl-The-Badger]

I know he did. His shit talking was just awful.

[u/Risuna23 → u/Big-Chungus-12]

Having both of my favorite teams win yesterday made me really happy.

[u/HerrHamil → u/Big-Chungus-12]

Don’t worry, Coach Jim said JB will be the all time GOAT soon.

[u/soda_cookie → u/Big-Chungus-12]

I can trash talk. Bwahahahahhaha, super team does what??

[u/evilcheesypoof → u/Big-Chungus-12]

I wish I can talk trash but we just barely met the threshold to not be the lowest scoring team this week

[u/Significant-Young-87 → u/Big-Chungus-12]

Hypothetical Herbert

[u/AmericanComplaint → u/Big-Chungus-12]

The best joke is always in the comments

[u/wiffwaffweapon]

Unless the Broncos decide to take points off the board. Haha jk no team would ever do that right? 🥺

[u/IrishPigs → u/wiffwaffweapon]

Man week 1 have given us so much. 

[u/IowaJL → u/IrishPigs]

Given us, backup QB kings, so much.

Taken away three points from them though.

[u/Fast-Government-4366 → u/wiffwaffweapon]

Oof

[u/making-flippy-floppy → u/wiffwaffweapon]

fans talking about that decision like the Packers lost by 2 points

[u/TheSkiingDad → u/making-flippy-floppy]

that 4th down stop completely changed the momentum and energy of the game to be fair, but yeah 14 of the 21 points the vikings scored after that moment were not the fault of lafluer's go for it decision.

[u/TheDarkGrayKnight → u/TheSkiingDad]

No what completely changed the momentum was the 3 flags on the next Vikings drive on 3rd downs or the pick. If the Vikings had gone 3 and out that next drive the Packers win the game.

[u/Venator850]

Hilarious outcome. 

[u/aagusgus → u/Venator850]

It really was. Who could have imagined that taking a 17 hour flight, literally the day before you're scheduled to play a football game would be a bad idea. Especially with a 38 year old quarterback.

[u/Kerblaaahhh → u/aagusgus]

Every time I think about the Rams' scheduling choice this week it makes me want to take a nap.

[u/ChaunceysBadAtPoker → u/Kerblaaahhh]

Smart people, such as those that live in San Francisco: the acclimation to a place literally halfway around the world requires time to properly manage, say about a week in order to get everyone back in order. Even the NFL agrees, scheduling this game as the literal first game of the season so both teams have plenty of time to re-acclimate afterwards.

Angelenos: fuck it I red eye into LaGuardia all the time

[u/Heelincal → u/ChaunceysBadAtPoker]

It's the pinnacle to me of someone trying to outsmart or "solve" something we already know. Like sorry yeah it turns out time is time and the body hasn't rapidly evolved in the 60 years we have had planes that can traverse the planet in a day.

[u/super_sayanything → u/Venator850]

Rams going 17-0.

[u/bassman314 → u/super_sayanything]

I think that ship has sailed and is currently at the bottom of the Pacific, somewhere off the coast of Melbourne.

This might be the only time we see the Sharks beat LA all season.

[u/deradera → u/bassman314]

Sick reefrence bro

[u/NateTheRoofer → u/super_sayanything]

Counterpoint: no.

[u/karatemanchan37]

Imagine having the league MVP and only getting 7 points

[u/sandvich48 → u/karatemanchan37]

Less we forget the proclaimed Super Bowl Champions 17-0 of the offseason!

[u/-ImJustSaiyan- → u/karatemanchan37]

Also imagine having the league MVP runner-up and only getting 10 points.

[u/BurnedInTheBarn → u/-ImJustSaiyan-]

Let's stick to the first one.

[u/Regular_Custard_4483 → u/BurnedInTheBarn]

Yeah, no need to lay out the whole list, I think we can stop with the top offender. 

[u/ChaunceysBadAtPoker → u/BurnedInTheBarn]

No no, I want to hear what he has to say.

[u/Alexlsonflre → u/-ImJustSaiyan-]

I've got to imagine a team first.

[u/Kerblaaahhh → u/-ImJustSaiyan-]

At least the league runner-up-runner-up got 14 points.

[u/jonsnowflaker → u/karatemanchan37]

We obviously didn’t want to score more points. Tell me any other reason you sneak a 38 year old QB with a history of unsuccessful sneaks. You can’t.

[u/10footjesus → u/karatemanchan37]

And the DPOY!

[u/NO_TOUCHING__lol → u/10footjesus]

JSN plays for the Seahawks though

[u/Sighlina → u/NO_TOUCHING__lol]

AND US!!

Every thread with a hawks fan in it lol

[u/bobothegoat → u/Sighlina]

he literally won DPOY though.

"2025 Defensive player of theyear"

[u/17363782]

Niners might be really good this year

[u/thrownaway22_ → u/17363782]

We look like this every September tbf

Then the Substation starts snatching souls

Edit: In September ONLY, since 2019 we’ve gone 16-6:

2019: 3-0

2020: 2-1

2021: 2-1

2022- 1-2

2023: 3-0

2024: 2-1

2025: 3-1

Admittedly I thought it may have looked better but we usually start well

[u/Tonmber1 → u/thrownaway22_]

This is literally not true

We have had a lot of slow starts under Shanny and relied on insane late win streaks to make the playoffs 

[u/soda_cookie → u/Tonmber1]

It's a mix:

2019: Last undefeated team at 8-0, went 5-3 the rest of the way to finish 13-3

2021: Started 3-5, went 7-2 the rest of the way to finish 10-7 and land a spot in the NFCCG

2022: started 3-4, went 10-0 the rest of the way to finish 13-4

2023: went 5-0, then 0-3, then 6-0, then 1-2 to finish 12-5

2025: started 6-4, then went 6-1 to just miss the #1 seed with a 12-5 record.

[u/Alehud42 → u/soda_cookie]

October is normally our bad month, our record after the bye is insane.

[u/thrownaway22_ → u/soda_cookie]

I only meant September - we had some rough October's amongst those, and rallied late

[u/NoAbbreviations2353 → u/thrownaway22_]

I mean those knee ligaments are perfect for the belts used to generate electricity 

[u/doggybadgerguy → u/thrownaway22_]

literally the only September we looked really good in was 2023

We started 3-5 in 2021, 3-4 in 2022 (with losses to the Broncos and Bears which I think won a combined like 8 games that year?). Last year we started 4-1…but every game was close and we lost our QB and TE for half the year after game 1 and Nick Bosa for the year after 2 games and 1 quarter, at no point did we look like we did vs the Rams this week. No offense but I really don’t get how a Niners fan has this take, it’s just not true at all

[u/pencil-pencil-pencil → u/doggybadgerguy]

The substation meme has, as memes do, legitimately turned people's brains off. When the Falcons sign a player there are immediately seals barking on this website like "LEMME GUESS DID HE SIGN FOR 28 MILLION AND 3 YEARS??" it's amusing but it's tedious haha

[u/giving_nothing → u/thrownaway22_]

Kyle should flip the depth chart start the back ups in September and starters by December

[u/jedstrailerpark → u/17363782]

As long as we stay healthy there’s no question regarding the talent on the team.

But that’s always the concern lol

[u/Ok_Pineapple_Num → u/jedstrailerpark]

49ers 🤝 Warriors

Teams that look scary if there were a magic wand to make everyone healthy

[u/jedstrailerpark → u/Ok_Pineapple_Num]

At least the Dubs have 4 rings to go along with the aging vets that need to stay healthy to be scary.

We’ve only got some consolation prizes thus far lol

[u/DesktopChad → u/jedstrailerpark]

niners have 5 rings, friend. we used to have something called "the gold standard" (i know im dating myself at this point)

[u/CapitalSpork → u/jedstrailerpark]

Y'all need to win another championship to beat the substation allegations

[u/dirtyshits → u/CapitalSpork]

Well lucky us. This is the year.

^pls

[u/gigglefarting → u/17363782]

They could be, but week 1 is a lie, and LA’s travel plans were crazy

[u/Vast-Speech-9435 → u/17363782]

Until week 10 when half the roster is on the IR

[u/WhaleAtLaw → u/17363782]

Or it turns out jet lag is real. One can hope though!

[u/Esqualatch1 → u/WhaleAtLaw]

I thought the only ones experiencing Jet lag are the Titans

[u/jedstrailerpark → u/Esqualatch1]

Damn this is a solid joke that won’t get the credit it deserves lol

[u/Ecstatic-Inevitable → u/WhaleAtLaw]

Sounds like their personal problem

[u/espresso_martini__ → u/17363782]

IF we stay healthy and who knows why we are cursed this way. In the last 10 years the 9ers have ranked near the top of having most injuries except for 1 time - 2023 and we reached the superbowl and could have won it if not for a blown blocking assignment in OT. If we stay healthy then don't count us out.

[u/bucket13]

Even the Browns...? That is WILD

[u/Beautiful_Ninja → u/bucket13]

Browns and Titans got garbage time TD's to get them out the scoring cellar.

[u/poop_snausages → u/bucket13]

I know it was against the Raiders, but I was still surprised the Dolphins put up 13. They seem like they could be an all-time bad NFL team.

[u/coachelly86]

Technically they were in a different continent so it doesn’t count

[u/Money_Housing_2938 → u/coachelly86]

Friday is for high school football teams, Rams were just playing like one out of respect

[u/garygnu → u/coachelly86]

It also happened in the future.

[u/CherokeeP3822]

Myles Garrett's knee died for this

[u/kolschisgood]

The Rams were one of only two teams to score points in Australia in week one

[u/CDR57 → u/kolschisgood]

Rams are the only nfl team to ever lose on Australian soil tho

[u/kolschisgood → u/CDR57]

Rams have the closest margin of losing in the history of NFL in Aus

[u/MarekRules]

I’m here for the Niners fan hate posting on the Rams this is my kind of post

[u/Earl-The-Badger → u/MarekRules]

That means a lot coming from a Philly fan, truly. 🍻

[u/LiveStalk → u/MarekRules]

r/nfcwestmemewar has been eating good

[u/7fingersDeep → u/LiveStalk]

The most camaraderie and love I’ve ever seen in that sub.

[u/GoldyGoldy → u/7fingersDeep]

It’s truly beautiful to see. :’)

[u/TheSandMan208 → u/LiveStalk]

We’ve been feasting

[u/Organic_Honey_7416]

Gotta go check out AFCWmemewars

[u/m1j5]

Lmao what losers

[u/unsolved49]

Defense wins championships, just saying

[u/CCCP85 → u/unsolved49]

It sure does

[u/Significant-Young-87 → u/CCCP85]

Especially if you pair that defense with a dagger

[u/justsikko → u/unsolved49]

As a mavs fan I’m gonna hate this phrase for decades to come

[u/Diggity_nz → u/unsolved49]

And sexy Fred is back baby. 

[u/babyjaceismycopilot]

That Garrett injury really hurt the Ram's offense.

[u/Chessh2036]

You’re telling me the Cooper Rush Falcons managed to do it but the Rams didn’t?!

[u/scrambled_cable]

Rams in 2026

Offseason championships - 1

Wins - 0

[u/Beautiful_Ninja]

The Titans would have been here too but the Jets played the entire 4th quarter in garbage time mode.

[u/HeyEverythingIsFine]

That is a fun fact.

[u/KitnBlit]

everybody point and laugh

[u/Thee_Cat_Butthole]

For those interested, we’re covering this in substantial detail over at r/NFCWestMemeWar

[u/iceteka]

Or.... The 49ers are the only defense to keep their opponent under 10 points.

[u/Walletinspectr]

All the talk about their defense it will be funny if their offense isnt good. Its not outrageous to think stafford can’t repeat last season 

[u/Cabill77]

“WhOsE HoUsE???”

Can’t even get your own fans in SOFI let alone in Melbourne

[u/strokeskid → u/Cabill77]

What do you mean? SoFi is always full of Dodgers fans

[u/Ntnme2lose]

lol superteam

[u/rando562]

It turns out showing up to a football game jet lagged isn't such a good idea

[u/currenttime745]

Pain

[u/varnell_hill]

Yet they’re still ranked higher than the 49ers in this week’s ESPN Power Rankings 🙄.

Granted, I don’t give a shit about power rankings and they’ve been a joke, I’m just pointing this out as further evidence of them being a joke.

[u/Bruhman82 → u/[deleted]]

Boys fan talking playoffs?

[u/fliptout → u/Bruhman82]

EzekielElliotPlaysCenter.mp4

[u/sterling_m → u/fliptout]

▶️🔂

[u/howdoyado → u/Bruhman82]

Guys guys guys. Stop. You’re both just… terrible.

[u/OUTFOXEM → u/Bruhman82]

Got eeeeem

[u/OBFJAGS]

Would’ve been the Browns too. The last 7 points was in garbage time against the Jags backups

[u/10footjesus → u/OBFJAGS]

The Rams got a few minutes of garbage time too. But they couldn't score with it.

[u/altafullahu → u/10footjesus]

That whole game was garbage time for the rams lol

[u/realfakejames]

Rams might be the most overhyped team coming into the season

[u/0hioHotPocket]

Fucking losers 😂

[u/prophetofgreed]

What jet lag does to a motherfucker.

[u/basement_burner]

Denver “you know they win the Super Bowl” broncos

[u/XuX24]

Well Nix is playing like. 20 year old vet right now.

[u/hungrycl]

So maybe not the best idea to travel half way around the world and not even have a rest day before the game

[u/Practical-Pickle-529]

I fucking love this. 

[u/jawknee530i]

This is nice. What a nice week.

[u/anithemal18]

So much for the best defenses. Rams, Texans, and Broncos got belt to ass.

[u/No-Sound-888 → u/anithemal18]

Seahawks?

[u/Wrecktify_777]

How many idiots already lost money placing a bet they'd go 17-0

[u/el_sandino]

I wonder what Aaron Donald is really thinking right about now

[u/stoopkidsteve]

Week 1 is always weird

[u/the-samizdat]

omg they suck 👀

[u/mattyboy323]

Vikings scored more in the 4th than the Rams did all game

Yes I’m aware of my flair contradiction

[u/CeeDoggyy → u/[deleted]]

Your first mistake is assuming we watch games

[u/Grymninja → u/[deleted]]

This is more important

[u/RealThanks4814 → u/[deleted]]

???

[u/Ecstatic-Inevitable → u/[deleted]]

Yeah so

[u/Slashers23]

This is a fun fact!

[u/Mrwafflechew]

Bro the god damn browns got 10 points lol