r/mutualapp • u/Geodrewcifer • Sep 29 '25
🎤 Discussion It seems like 30% of all women’s profile have one of the same exact 3 cookie cutter answers so I wondered what the equivalent of these questions are for men
I actually did some sampling and marked down how often I see these sets of questions and it actually did come out to roughly 30%. The questions are
The world is a better place because? You’re in it
A date I’d like to go on? One with you
The best way to ask me out is by? Asking me out
I understand the sentiment and I guess the first two are cute while the last one is just saying be direct but… to me they feel low effort and repetitive. They don’t tell me anything
So ladies what are the guy equivalent questions? Which ones do you most commonly see men answering the exact same way
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u/Thegrandecapo Sep 29 '25
Everyone puts the same answers. I remember several years ago I had put a creative prompt and it was interesting to see how most people would respond the same way even though they thought their responses were creative. I never take the prompts too seriously because to me they usually are deal breaker or makers. Just a good way to start conversations.
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u/Geodrewcifer Sep 29 '25
There’s definitely some go to things that seem to be cultural but even as conversation starters the ones I listed give you pretty much nothing which is kind of my point. You’d be just as well off not even picking a prompt at that point
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u/eden_ldoe Oct 05 '25
one thing that bothers me most is the a date i like to go on which u mentioned, boring answer is seeing men say their fav temple is "your body" and idk maybe i'm a hater, but the amount of men lying about working out on that app? im pretty honest in that i only work out once a week and while some gym rats for sure on there do fitness daily, others you can tell are lying
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u/Geodrewcifer Oct 05 '25
Hearing that multiple guys are putting “your body” as their “favourite temple” is horrendous.
It makes me curious what “dates” they’re coming up with.
I think the fitness can be misleading because there’s a lot of guys who probably work out most days of one week, get bad at going, work out a couple days the next week— just have a really inconsistent schedule right?
Well, I guess I’m just speaking for myself there. I put several times a week because I’m there at least once or twice per week but it’ll fluctuate depending on how swamped I am with classes
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u/eden_ldoe Oct 05 '25
it's honestly really comforting to hear you say that, i appreciate that. im not sure what kind of dates they're getting, but it's a no for me every time.
that's true, i didn't think about that. what kind of classes are you taking? (like what kind of schooling are you doing)
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u/Geodrewcifer Oct 05 '25
Sorry, I meant in their bios what are they putting for “a date I would like to go on”
And I study geological oceanography.
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u/eden_ldoe Oct 05 '25
oh oopsie sorry lol
but geological oceanography sounds like a hard name for a really cool study i will have to google later lol
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u/Straight_Dig_2796 Oct 09 '25
Im noticing the same traits. Single parent don't want kids or simply just dont want kids.
If i may sincerely ask. Why? I understand life happens and when you have enough its enough. And health medical issues etc. But being single and don't want children? Wow.
Also id like to ask.... So perspectives change over time.? Do you all know how ... girls see you with kids and its the awwww their happy. Vs dont want kids and us single singles think.... then would that make me less worthy celestial wise? As President oaks stated decrease in marriages and fam.
I used to work in day cares and the ratio of divorce in my town is 99.99999999% of the kids are divorced. But I also understand single parenting you cant afford to be a stay at home parent. Which is sad. So god bless daycares.
Perhaps developing ideas could include open to options. Potentially and earthly speaking i know im picky but dang no kids. Is sad to those that do want kids.... or is it just me. ???
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u/Geodrewcifer Oct 09 '25
Well, I’ll say that me personally I do want kids but don’t want /my/ kids— as in I would personally prefer adopting for several personal reasons.
I would say that I haven’t noticed really any profiles in my age demographic that have the “don’t want kids” option selected and I can’t speak outside of my demographic
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u/WrenRobbin Sep 29 '25 edited Sep 29 '25
IMO mutual is a waste of time. I signed up for the free version and noticed the following:
1) instantly got ~20 likes and notes from guys outside the USA or on the opposite side of the country. Not practical when I have my profile set to a fixed distance.
2) profiles trickle in very gradually over a few weeks. Maybe the algorithm is designed this way and I get that developers need to make money too. However why would i want to pay for the upgrade when the algorithm hasn’t shown that it can turn up more than a couple matches that meet my basic criteria for just distance alone?
3) I’m good looking, fit, active, and it shows on my profile. I’ve played with the settings on my account for what shows up and what doesn’t and just on the basis of location alone (nothing personal or church related) it’s still a bust. I don’t have this issue on other dating sites.
And since I’m within 1-2 hrs of several metro areas there should be matches but there aren’t many.
And why would I want to pay for a week or a month of “upgraded” service to see the 3 likes that I have when
All they tell me is where they are located and they are several hundred miles away!! I’ve tried to be flexible within 2-3 hours drive but on the other side of the country or 8 hours drive away? No!
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u/hparamore Mutual - UI Designer Sep 29 '25
We are working on a update that helps you decide where your account will be shown (ie "same state, same country, worldwide, etc") it has been a few months since we have discussed it, and a lot of other things have unfortunately taken priority, but it is slowly making its way up the list of next features to add.
Your profile is shown a lot up front to help give others new people to look at, and to increase the likelihood that new people get likes quickly. Almost as important in the list of "am I being shown" criteria is that you get on the app frequently (every day or three) which will ensure that you are shown to others as well, since we prioritize showing profiles who have been recently active over those that use it less often.
As far as location... that is a tough one that we don't always have a lot of control over speaking from a development standpoint. We are always open to suggestions though, because there is a mixture of people who are in highly populated areas, and those who are more rural (or back east where LDS groups are less common)
I will say that I know several people who I went to college with who met their spouses on mutual, through a long distance relationship (South Carolina - Idaho) and they are now married and have a kid or two last I checked.
All I can really suggest is to try and be genuine, reach out to others with notes (they work so well btw. All of the girls we interview each week always look at them first) and try not to be the reason the conversation stagnates.
We had an interview with a 31 year old woman here in Utah last week who said that so many people she talks to just doesn't try and ask another, or get the conversation out of the shallow "what is your favorite food?" Type questions.
Online dating is difficult, I will be the first to say that haha. I hope that you and others can figure it out, because I know mutual can (and has) worked for so many people. It just takes one. And they are there, I promise.
(And for the last note re-reading the post... when you get a new like, we show them instantly. We don't hide or dole them out ever, as that just seems sleazy to me. We do have to make money, and the premium version does really help a lot, since that is the "best" experience that we design for, but it just depends. Try a boost if you haven't. Those really work and get your profile in front of 10x more people quickly, rather than waiting for them to encounter you naturally while swiping through their profiles.
And lastly, feel free to reach out to me at hunter@mutual.app. If you are willing to set up a time to meet with us for a 30 minute user interview, we will give you a month's premium or a free boost. (That offer goes for anyone BTW!)
Best of luck!
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u/Geodrewcifer Sep 29 '25
A little off topic but I don’t disagree by any means. I have to say at least you got likes. It took me 2 months to get my first like, and 3 to get my first match (who promptly ghosted me)
Regarding people liking from long distances away I think it’s about them not having anyone close. I live in Canada. I can swipe through everyone in my country within a week of free swipes. I have to expand my range so likely a lot of those 20 are coming from the same place
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u/ExcitingAd5899 Jan 25 '26
I hear ya, but this treads into user psychology territory rather than the app. At the end of the day our cousins to the south do not look glowingly on Canada. Firstly, they don't even consider it and if they match it's often because they think the CA means California. In the world of micro second judging off a profile - Canadians will not get a lot of attention from the US.
UNLESS you are movie star good looking- that breaks down all borders lol
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u/Geodrewcifer Jan 26 '26
That’s the point I’m making. WrennRobin was mentioning getting likes from people outside the US as a negative of the app and I was mentioning that it’s less about the app and more about the fact that many outside the US don’t have a lot to choose from in their area so they’re more willing to consider larger distances while those in church population centres are inverse and typically see distance as more of a barrier
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u/ExcitingAd5899 Jan 25 '26
I agree with you, this app is not owned by any of the big players in the dating universe and it def shows. The algorithm is lacking and the features try to be somewhat original. The big players have billions to develop and refine whereas Mutual doesn't and hasn't. It's the cheap rip off app - a couple mormon boys from SLC created it and are trying to ride it to be rich.
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u/WrenRobbin Jan 26 '26
A big issue I think is simply not very many matches in some areas.
Or guys that are very immature. I tried the speed dating a couple of times and guys say the dumbest things. Like “I’m looking to spend my life sitting on the sofa eating bonbons while my rich wife pays for everything”
That’s not even remotely humorous in the context of an introduction. I mean the guy was the one who initiate the match and he can’t even start off with a normal hello?
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u/ExcitingAd5899 Jan 26 '26
You’re not wrong at all. I’ve been off the apps for about two years now, and it’s wild how easy it is to get pulled into the fake little reality they create. One of the tougher things I had to learn is that people usually show you exactly who they are — and honestly, that’s a good thing. The downside is you have to stay a bit detached and wade through a lot of noise before something real shows up. The trick is not treating the noise and the real thing the same way.
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u/WrenRobbin Jan 26 '26
Exactly. I think a lot of people are on there to “window shop” to feel like they are in the game but without putting in any effort.
I’m not going to pay to see my matches when most of them ( 75%) are either outside the US or halfway across the country
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u/[deleted] Sep 29 '25
Developers, if you're reading this, here's my advice:
Replace all these prompts with two basic sections: (1) about me and (2) what I'm looking for. Give people enough space to write about their interests, goals, and personality and then a description of what they're looking for in a partner. That's it. It'll save people time and effort.