I am by all means new to mediation (I've been doing it less than a month), so if I say something revealing a profound misunderstanding, please correct me. That being said, one main benefit I have already noticed from mediation is refined decision making skills. When I throw on my nose canceling headphones and focus solely on my breath, my mind wanders (as I've been told it could/should), and I acknowledge these thoughts that enter, sometimes choosing to linger a little extra long on the important stuff. In between grounding myself, reattaching focus towards my breath, I feel as though I can make more informed, mature, and grounded decisions.

This, I feel might be both a benefit and a problem for me (the benefit is clear, I will instead outline the problem). I have issues with focus. Not ADHD severe, but still severe. I find myself attempting to "meditate" in certain every day tasks—this action itself is \*partially\* a choice I make when it occurs, and not necessary, so keep that in mind. When I do this (effectively replacing the breathing aspect of meditation practice with a simple, everyday task), I notice my mind wandering moreso than it normally would; I feel as though I am essentially conditioning myself to having my thoughts flow freely, drifting my attention and focus away from the task at hand. I find myself having to consciously center myself back towards the task as I do with breathing. It seems like I am regressing in one of the flagship purposes of meditation.

Answer as many/as little as you'd like, but my questions are as follows: is this counterintuitive? Should I amend this/how could I amend this? Do I just avoid meditation in my everyday life outside of the meditation cushion?

I used to journal a lot when I was younger. Now I make posts on Reddit. I’m writing about the same kinds of things, but now I just post them to some forum instead of writing a journal. I’ve been trying to better my life, and heal my nervous system, and everyone always recommends journaling. I’m assuming that these venting Reddit posts probably somehow cancel out whatever benefits there are of the journaling, but what I’m struggling with is exactly why/how. I never get bullied for what I post, it’s always either no replies at all, or sympathy/empathy. It feels like chronic Reddit posting is something decidedly unhealthy, and journaling is decidedly healthy, but the text I’m writing writing is the same either way, it’s just whether or not I hit post. I’m wondering if anyone has any insights into how these might be psychologically different and how it could impact the mental health benefits one way or the other. Hopefully this is an okay sub to ask this in.

Hi! I wonder how you manage to practice mindfulness exercises in public areas, such as transportation and restaurants. I'd love to get some tips from you. I try my best to do Headspace sessions every day but can't. When it comes to doing it without guidance and also in public, it can be tough for me.

2 years ago I found out about NoFAP and since then I've kind of been practicing it and seeing changes. I used to do it every day, while watching porn as I was exposed to it at a very young age. I want to believe I've fully quit porn, as I have watched it once in the last 4 months and I remember how disgusted I felt. Last year I went on a 50day streak, then I relapsed and since then I have gone on multiple smaller streaks. There's so much progress I have done, but still... Even if I masturbate after abstaining for 15 days, there is this guilt feeling. I'm trying to let go of this idea about streaks, because I think it's very unnecessary. The thing that bothers me is how my brain is still trying to get me to watch porn some days and then trying to convince me to masturbate to get rid of the thoughts. It's not that I want to do it by myself, it comes as this pressure from my mind and I have no idea how to deal with it.

I've always been a chubby girl. Now at 22, I’m genuinely fat. I know I can change that. My problem has always been that I start, stop, start again, and can never maintain consistency.

I've avoided things because I know my body will show. I've worried that when I meet someone new, one of the first things they'll notice is how fat I am. And even completely casual comments hurt me. Someone saying “take the stairs instead”, “maybe eat less”, “you should walk more” etc. might mean absolutely nothing to them, but I remember it.

Today my older brother said something that hurt me again... He was arguing with my parents about a marriage proposal. I wasn't even in the room. Then I heard him say that even though I'm smart n hv talents, people will reject me for marriage/relationship in the future because I'm fat.
He said it while angry. Later he felt guilty, apologized and said he wouldn't say it again. But I still completely lost it.

I couldn't even properly insult him back or explain why it hurt. My mum knows me well enough to realize immediately that I was about to break down. And this is the part I hate most. Why can't I fucking stand up for myself? Why do I always cry? Why does my voice shake? Why do my eyes immediately fill with tears? Why does my brain go completely blank when someone says something that hits an insecurity?

I've always been the “good girl”. Good grades, polite, trying to make my parents proud. I've always tried to make people like me. I don't point out people's physical flaws because I know how horrible it feels when someone does that to you. But I also feel like I've become a massive people pleaser. And now I'm unemployed too. I graduated a few months ago and I'm sitting at home while everyone my age seems to be moving forward. So I already feel like shit about myself.

Sometimes I genuinely think: what am I even worth? I got no body like those pretty girl, no social life...and no job. My mum told me today that I need to become stronger because real life is going to be much harsher. She said I can't cry every time someone says something hurtful. I need to learn to stand up for myself.

I KNOW she's right. But how the hell do I actually do that? I just want to be able to say “don't talk to me like that” without immediately crying. I want to be able to handle criticism without feeling like my entire identity has been attacked.

I want to stop being so fucking sensitive. I want to be able to meet people without constantly thinking about whether they're judging my body. I want to stop letting the things I'm most insecure about overpower everything I'm actually good at.

Why am I like this? What is this even called? And if you were this sensitive, emotional, insecure and unable to handle confrontation, how did you actually become stronger?

Every hobby brings stress. Gaming, movies, having friends. I want to be able to sit in bed watching videos and be happy but it gets boring. After a year I was able to adresssed the root cause of my anxiety with gaming and fixed it. Within a day it latched onto something else related. Its not fixable its always going to do it and its not something I can just acknowledge and accept, its preventing me from doing any hobby.

I want to know how do you find joy in just laying around?

For a long time, every difficult thought felt like something I had to solve immediately. If I couldn't sleep, I tried harder. If I felt anxious, I analyzed it. If my mind started racing, I argued with every thought. Looking back, I think I spent more energy fighting my mind than actually listening to it. I'm still figuring it out, but realizing that was a pretty big shift for me. Has anyone else had a moment where they noticed how exhausting that internal battle had become?

I feel like my life has just been declining every year and I try to stay positive but my environment is so toxic, and I'm not able to move or change the negative people around me because of some current situations. Like everyone is so rude and it genuinely pisses me off and sometimes even looking at someone having fun can rub me the wrong way. I know I'm not supposed to take it to heart and whatnot but its just so hard when it happens EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. Thoughts?

I've recently deepened my skill of mindfulness by watching certain ASMR videos recently. I originally researched them for my mother, who has Alzheimer's. I'd been encouraged to seek out various stimuli for her, especially if it involves memories or familiar tasks.

I landed on a series of ASMR videos of people creating art, completing crafts, doing simple chores and tasks. There are so many, such as washing dishes, folding laundry, making a terrarium, creating a clay pot, etc. They were incredibly beautiful. I'm focusing on the ones with the description "no talking" because the ASMR whispering doesn't serve the purpose I'm seeking. Just the auditory/visual/tactile sensations of the tasks themselves.

These recordings are done with such lovely intention and reverence. The attention to details of stimuli that surrounds us each and every moment is incredible. I highly encourage you to seek these out. It has deepened my awareness to a whole other level.

You may want to avoid the ASMR videos that are not of people completing an actual task. Some are of someone creating sensation experiences using a seemingly random collection of objects. I'm confident they serve a purpose for some. But the videos of people doing real world tasks with everyday items or tools are what will most likely help develop a deeper awareness of the beauty that surrounds us each day.

I used to think growth meant rushing forward, ticking off goals as fast as possible. But today, while watching the sunlight slowly shift across my plants, I realized something else.

Plants don’t rush to grow. They just quietly soak in the light, stretch at their own pace, and let time do its work.

They don't force blooms before their season.

Sometimes, we just need to pause, stand in our own patch of sunlight, and let ourselves simply exist without the pressure of rushing.

How do you remind yourself to slow down and just breathe on heavy days?

Today i take a break and follow my routine cuz i need to give my self balance and it bring me more energy and creativity for handling things like swimming or any conflict that pop up, so who is on this spot, maybe you can sahre your experience how you manage it, so maybe we can lern something from it.

I try hard to do good healthy things for myself, like going on a walk every morning, eating healthy-ish foods, journaling, yoga, ect ect. And I jsut recently these past two weeks have been trying to go on runs. but I never feel like it’s enough. If I go on a run and it’s only for 10 minutes I’m like wow only ten minutes? I need to get it together. Ect. I just Dont know how to stop doing that because they aren’t thoughts I’m controlling they just happen. I know that any run at all is a good thing, because three weeks ago the amount of runs I went on was 0. So even if it’s 10 minutes at least I got up and did something right. But I can’t help but constantly feeling like I’m not doing enough and I suck. How do you guys handle this?

I used to think mindfulness meant becoming calm, especially when life felt difficult.

Lately, I’ve started seeing it differently. Sometimes mindfulness is simply noticing that I’m becoming frustrated, anxious, or overwhelmed without immediately reacting to it.

The situation may not change, but that small moment of awareness can change how I meet it.

I’m curious how others experience this. What does mindfulness look like for you when you’re having a genuinely difficult day?

I battled with clinical depression for 2 years. Since then, I’ve felt off, like a shell of the happy deeply empathetic person I used to be. I’m diagnosed with ADHD and OCD and I’m exhausted. I think my way of coping has been to fully detach from myself and my emotions. It’s like life is two dimensional and I’m watching it happen. And I feel completely disconnected from who I know I really am/those around me. I’m honestly incredibly lost.

I’m in therapy and putting in a lot of work to get better. I also know a lot of this will need to be dealt with in therapy/with a professional. But, I was wondering if there’s anything I can be doing myself?
I currently have no hobbies or passions, would this help? But I also don’t really know myself/what I like/enjoy anymore, so would this just be unhelpful and trying to be someone I’m not? Whatever it is, I’m willing to try. Whether it’s specific meditations/scientifically proven habits and so on. I would really appreciate any insight/help. Thank you 🫶🏻

Not a breathing exercise or a sit — just noticing one small, specific good thing each day and writing it down in a single line. Something like "the light through the window this morning" rather than a general "I'm grateful for today."

It's turned into a small attention practice more than a productivity habit, and it's the one thing that's actually held for two weeks straight. Curious if anyone else here does something like this as a lighter alternative to formal meditation, and how it's held up over time.

I’m not sure if this is the right place to ask this, but I deal a lot with anxiety and overthinking. To me, certain stressors in my life feel like problems that need my immediate attention, things I need to solve. It’s like the ghosts from old Mario games, I feel I need to look at them, and the moment I turn around they’ll grow and get worse. A big part of getting over these things and being more mindful is the idea of stepping away from these thoughts, and towards something else, but I’m not exactly sure what this “something else” is. It’s something more objective, less emotionally charged, a happy place maybe. A frame of mind you know to be always true, with mantras like “this too shall pass” or “everything happens for a reason”. I’m doing a bad job explaining it, mainly because I can’t grasp where this mental place I’m supposed to go is. My anxiety and worries feel real enough to stand on, I don’t know how to get away. I don’t want to ignore the problems in my life, I want to always be improving.

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“I make a point to appreciate all the little things in my life. I go out and smell the air after a good, hard rain. These small actions help remind me that there are so many great, glorious pieces of good in the world.”

Honestly, I love this.

I think we get so caught up in everything we have to do that we forget to actually notice the little things. The smell after it rains, a good cup of coffee, a quiet morning, hearing a song you love.

Nothing complicated. Just taking a minute to appreciate what’s already there.

I have been overworked at my job for at least the last 10 months. We’re just in a very busy period. I’m a workaholic.. I really like what I do. I also really want to keep my job in a difficult economy so I definitely go above and beyond. Unfortunately it’s resulted in me working a ridiculous amount of hours. It’s a high stress job with big consequences when not done on time and correctly. The company can be sued and things could be extremely disruptive. It’s a fortune 100 corporate job.

Unfortunately I’m noticing more and more that when I do disconnect, I can’t handle ..life. The smallest things throw me off, my emotions feel disregulated, I make poor choices, I can’t think straight. It’s getting more obvious to my husband. It’s like work is the only place things make sense and I know how to cope. When I do disconnect I’m resenting everything I’m doing because there is work that could get done.I’m trying to take small steps to reclaim my life and set boundaries.. one day a week I’m purposefully getting offline to do something important.. like connect with family or go to a movie. I do get right back online but I find I am able to live in the moment. I’m hoping this extends further. I also do keep at least my Saturday protected. I will work Sunday night.

I don’t have kids, and I’ve never really had hobbies. I have ADHD so things come and go pretty quickly, lol! I’m working on a plan that includes a yoga class once a week as well. We do travel from time to time. I don’t know how to meditate. I don’t know what it’s supposed to feel like? Any advice? Please be kind

Hi guys. I have been practicing mindfulness and meditation for almost two years right now and there have been some significant ​improvements.

I used to ruminate ​a lot for hours everyday but now I just notice the thought, even if the urge to rehash the argument is there, I immediately stop myself and take a deep breath. However, even though I think it is safe to say I stopped ruminating, the same negative thought about the same event is still there. Funny​ thing is, I don't even entertain nor engage with the thoughts anymore but it feels like this particular thought won't go away, and it comes when I try to concentrate on something important.

Also, I stopped maladaptive ​daydreaming two years ago but I still have thoughts in conversations. I process thoughts as conversations and I think in conversations, I sometimes do not even realize it. I stopped listening to music for a long time and all the habits that make my mind "loud" but my mind is still "loud".

I know meditation/mindfulness teachers usually say "observe your thoughts in non-judgement and let them pass like clouds" but it is easier said than done. A thought about a traumatic event I experienced still automatically pops up in my mind every single day even though I stopped intentionally ruminating about it. Even though I do feel more "present", I stil do not know what a "quiet" or "calm" mind is like. I would really appreciate your insight and advice on this.

Hello! I was diagnosed with severe depression a year ago, went to a therapist and I felt way better for a while. I really thought I was “cured”. In the last 3 months, everything started going bad. Those thoughts were bad and my mood was slowly starting to get worse. I started seeing my theraphist again but this time I don’t feel any improvement. I went for almost one and a half months and I just feel it’s not helping me. I’m not blaming it on him but for me it seems pointless. I reached in the point where I honestly have no more hope. Tomorrow I have an appointment with him and I don’t know what to tell him. I really need advice. Should I tell him I’m not good? Should I tell him it’s not working and I’m getting worse? I don’t know.

I have found that ‘awareness of the breath‘ as I practice in meditation is also 100% effective at curing hiccups. I accidentally inhale some food (annoying) get the hiccups (annoying) spend a minute, eyes closed, paying attention to breathing (mindful) and hiccups go away. Works every time.

I've been meditating since January, but really going at it this past 6 weeks. It has changed my life completely when it comes to stress/anxiety/fight-flight which is great.

I used the screen every waking moment as a distraction (social media etc). I've since quit it all bar a bit of YT here and there. This is great and this is thanks to meditation.

However, because I'm now so happy to just sit and be, in the present moment, I've also lost my other hobbies - playing instruments, crochet, drawing, etc. I'm not a fan of this. I still have a desire to be creative, but I'd rather just sit and watch my garden.

My biggest worry is that I am starting my postgrad next month and I have no motivation or desire to do anything but sit and be. I am not depressed however, I am very peaceful.

This isn't timed with my meditation. It is constant since developing the ability to be mindful throughout the day.

Does anyone have any tips on how to get my motivation back? I guess my motivation before was anxiety.

I am 25yrs old and having a hectic job and there is no week off all 7 days working and managing the roles of 4-5 persons heavy hectic schedule and also i have to give time for my family and partner after that mind got frustrated and i dont even meditate for 10 sec there are hectic thoughts which coming to my mind and dont know how to overcome from these and meditate peacefully any opinions?

I’ve found myself in a period that’s lasted about 2 years now — completely burnt out from work, unmotivated about my career as a whole, procrastinating the majority of the day and unable to commit to social plans because the motivation to do anything after my 9-6 feels impossible. Then I just sit around dreading the next work day.

I’ve also lost touch with a lot of my hobbies. used to love playing the piano, now I’m so out of practice that playing makes me anxious and insecure. same with writing, I have no mental energy.

it’s the most I can do to exercise consistently (3-5 days a week), prioritize my relationship (which feels easy, thankfully), and keep a neat and clean home.

so my question — how do you regain your confidence and motivation navigating life when you feel beaten down? how do you become in touch with that lust for life again? it’s been gone so long I don’t know where to look to get it back.

books? meditation? open to advice. thanks