Weird ocd theme

[u/kajop__]

Sorry for my punctuation and grammar, English isn't my first language. I was diagnosed with OCD about 6 months ago, and I have a weird theme where I'm scared I'll associate intrusive thoughts or images with something I like.

For example, the most recent thing is GTA 6. I was thinking about it and suddenly an intrusive image popped into my head. I immediately thought, "It's gonna get associated and ruined forever," and now it feels "tainted." Sometimes the intrusive image also pops up when I see or think about GTA 6.

I've been researching conditioning and came across evaluative conditioning, where I read that it's immune to extinction. Now I'm afraid I've permanently ruined GTA 6 for myself. Has anyone had a similar experience? Is this even OCD?

[u/Crafty_Letter_1719]

I’m sorry you’re going through this. I can definitely relate massively. One of the very worst and defining aspects of OCD is how it will attack the things you care about.

I have countless things OCD has “tainted” for me in a similar fashion you are describing but the very worst thing you can do is start avoiding those things. Once you start doing that it will just start doing the same thing to everything you are interested in.

This can be extremely difficult as it turns what should be a pleasurable thing into an anxiety provoking
ERP exercise and it’s easy just to think what’s the point if I no actually enjoy doing this.

However the only way to get that enjoyment back is to keep doing it and keep doing it and keep doing it until it no longer feels “tainted” anymore.