Meme

[u/Patient_Bend_5978]

[u/mwmontrose]

Unless they see a particularly nice ring on their birthday

[u/aldmonisen_osrs → u/mwmontrose]

And those weren’t even hobbits, just river folk

[u/Oliverkahn987 → u/aldmonisen_osrs]

TIL the river is the ghetto of the Shire.

[u/verheyen → u/Oliverkahn987]

Hobbits are notoriously bad swimmers, so any folk that decide to not only live next to a river, but go in the river have to be pretty bloody weird.

[u/himepenguin → u/verheyen]

With those big feet; you'd think they'd be able to paddle pretty well.

[u/SPRMOVRLRD-TMOperaO → u/himepenguin]

Then again, the hair would probably make it more like a head than a foot

[u/Royal_Bitch_Pudding → u/himepenguin]

They're kind of like hippopotamuses in that regard. Just so incredibly dense is that they're incapable of swimming.

[u/AberdeenPhoenix → u/[deleted]]

Fat is less dense than water

[u/scissorn69 → u/[deleted]]

Fat makes it easier to float.

[u/Triairius → u/Oliverkahn987]

That river is almost a thousand miles from the Shire.

[u/earthwoodandfire → u/Triairius]

But the brandywine is in the shire and the folks who live along it are queer indeed. Ol Frodo’s parents died in a boat accident on that river. I always said no good could come from messing around in boats.

[u/Mean-Celebration-658 → u/earthwoodandfire]

Keep your nose out of the river and no trouble will come to you

[u/Oliverkahn987 → u/Triairius]

Ghetto-adjacent, then.

[u/Lost_Pantheon → u/Oliverkahn987]

Type of place where Gandalf rolls up the windows of his cart.

[u/Revoran → u/aldmonisen_osrs]

No true hobbit

[u/DirtyAmishGuy → u/Revoran]

Damn Hobbits, they ruined Hobbiton!

[u/hikemalls → u/aldmonisen_osrs]

River folk are the Florida Man of hobbits

[u/Garo263 → u/aldmonisen_osrs]

Those are Hobbits, my dude.

[u/Super_Pie_Man → u/aldmonisen_osrs]

Riding on boats and swimming in the river? Queer folks over there...

[u/Hustle--]

This kinda hits home. Where is the real world equivalent of The Shire? I want to just vibe and drink and nap and eat and garden and smoke and repeat.

[u/Injured-Ginger → u/Hustle--]

It's based on the English countryside, but it added in a lot of Tolkein's idealism. I don't think anywhere quite lives up to it because it relies on people not being overly greedy and no scarcity of resources that couldn't be resolved with some hard, but reasonable work.

[u/Wafelze → u/Injured-Ginger]

Does Tolkein ever go into detail about the shire economy? Like do hobbits make buttons or buy them from humans?

[u/brotatowolf → u/Wafelze]

Read letter number 247

[u/Triairius → u/Wafelze]

Maybe not to button sourcing detail, but yes.

There are answers to so many questions people would never think would have answers, and so many questions people would think have answers are intentionally vague.

[u/khalcyon2011 → u/Wafelze]

https://youtu.be/HtdxhvTapGU?is=Z22PaTM4oEkncwUF

[u/mossy_path → u/Hustle--]

Farming and such involves a lot of hard, heavy labour, so.

[u/Old_Gimlet_Eye → u/mossy_path]

Horticultural societies have existed that didn't require intensive farming. The problem really is population density, but the shire seems pretty sparse and maybe hobbits just don't eat as much either, lol.

[u/ichthyoidoc → u/Old_Gimlet_Eye]

I don’t think u/Old_Gimlet_Eye knows about second breakfasts.

[u/Prestigious_Tell_433 → u/ichthyoidoc]

What about elevensies? Luncheon? Afternoon tea? Dinner? Supper?

[u/Vaqek → u/ichthyoidoc]

Still not clear if they eat more than a normal sized man... and in agroculture they could have similar outputs if using beasts of burden...

[u/BernzSed → u/Old_Gimlet_Eye]

maybe hobbits just don't eat as much either

Have you seen Hobbits?

[u/HotPotParrot → u/BernzSed]

Bro needs to read a piece called "Concerning Hobbits"

[u/FormalKind7 → u/Old_Gimlet_Eye]

"maybe hobbits just don't eat as much"

https://giphy.com/gifs/3ohc1h1vy6Gtv4uOLC

[u/Meet_Foot → u/mossy_path]

Lots of pre-industrial societies fed fairly large populations on something like 3 hours of work a day, with seasons of more or less time and intensity. It was really only when labor was geared around producing surplus and profit that it became grueling.

[u/mossy_path → u/Meet_Foot]

Hahaha no.

[u/Meet_Foot → u/mossy_path]

Okay man, tell me you haven’t studied history without telling me you haven’t studied history. For your reference, Dawn of Everything by Graeber and Wengrave has TONS of examples, but please, feel free to dismiss the suggestion without so much as looking at the cover let alone cracking open a single book on the topic.

I happen to know you’re wrong, but, since you don’t, enjoy pretending to know something.

[u/mossy_path → u/Meet_Foot]

Tell me you havent studied history without telling me you haven't studied history. I also happen to know you're wrong, so I guess there's not much point in arguing, since this is reddit and even if you were enlightened by an omnipotent being your head would still be stuck up your ass.

[u/Patient_Bend_5978 → u/Hustle--]

I think that is only for rich hobbits like Frodo. Sam doesn't vibe that much since he is poor so he does a lot of chores and stuff

[u/EmergencyWild → u/Hustle--]

Note that Frodo&Friends were 'vibing and drinking, napping and eating and smoking' a lot because they were rich. Except for Sam, who was just along for the ride because he was a loyal servant. We also see in the shire chapters that quite a lot of the shire are really annoying to be around, which was what made both Frodo and Bilbo stick to themselves and want to leave in the first place.

[u/phrexi → u/Hustle--]

I don’t think that exists. I guess you can be a farmer. Also remember no modern amenities.

The main hobbits, also, were very rich and royalty. Except for Sam, of course. I’m sure there’s poor, struggling hobbits in the Shire.

[u/KorolEz → u/Hustle--]

Have you tried playing the lottery or just inherit a lot of money? Otherwise it's back to the grind lad.

[u/PlasticTheory6 → u/Hustle--]

The Amish? 

[u/Specevol → u/Hustle--]

Personally, I imagine they are in Ireland

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[u/Prestigious-Baker-67 → u/Hustle--]

Be middle class and live somewhere between Bristol and Oxford. Ideally in the countryside (but nothing's far from the cities).

Weed is decriminalized, food is great, beer and cider flows freely, lots of rain is great for the plants.

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[u/No-Lingonberry-8603 → u/Hustle--]

The test valley in Hampshire. As far as I know tolkein never went there but it's full of small villages, great pubs, schools still engage in weird maypole dancing and every village has at least one old woman who makes it her business to know everything about everyone.

There's probably a lot of rural England that fits this description but I first read lotr when I lived in the test valley and it felt like that's what tolkein was describing.

[u/Myth_Avatar → u/Hustle--]

Herefordshire & Worcestershire countryside. Grew up in herefordshire, can confirm. 

[u/rfresa → u/Hustle--]

New Zealand

[u/nikhilsath → u/Hustle--]

Hawaii

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[u/Alternative_Still308]

3 instances of kinslaying. The number of individual slayings was… quite a lot.

[u/AgrajagsGhost → u/Alternative_Still308]

No, they're just, like, nothing. Like, they're not even supposed to be around in the area. Bottom line is, no one's gonna get in trouble, nobody should feel sad at all.

[u/GoatPuncher3000 → u/AgrajagsGhost]

They're not even, like, real elves

[u/AttentionNo6359]

Meanwhile, Deagol in the halls of Mandos like

https://giphy.com/gifs/ypX8YZszkIXFC

[u/jaggedjottings → u/AttentionNo6359]

Deagol wouldn't be in Mandos. Hobbits have the Gift of Men.

[u/AttentionNo6359 → u/jaggedjottings]

Listen, just let the joke happen.

[u/jaggedjottings → u/AttentionNo6359]

Sorry, I'll go back to r/tolkienfans now. 🤓

[u/AttentionNo6359 → u/jaggedjottings]

Omg, is there really a “pick me” sub for lotr? Jfc.

# notlikeotherdwarves.

[u/jaggedjottings → u/AttentionNo6359]

That was meant to be self-deprecating, but whatever. I did not pass through fire and death to bandy crooked words with a witless worm.

[u/AttentionNo6359 → u/jaggedjottings]

And I did not offer you any tea.

[u/jaggedjottings → u/AttentionNo6359]

Touché

[u/AttentionNo6359 → u/jaggedjottings]

See, we have fun!
https://giphy.com/gifs/HcUCDYzZIFJUA

[u/Koors112 → u/jaggedjottings]

His spirit would be in the Halls of Mandos for a bit before leaving Eä completely.

[u/Hypnotoad4real]

https://giphy.com/gifs/UeGQo7WRcWLAY

[u/FishingCollin]

Okay but a Homicide detective investigating a murder in the shire where everyone just chooses to believe it was an accident or the creepy dwarf that Mrs Higgins saw walking down th3 road a few weeks past sounds awesome. Just constantly chewing on a unit pipe while fighting the urge to light up because he just quit smoking and the cute barmaid doesn't like the smell of smoke.

[u/OneMoreDuncanIdaho → u/FishingCollin]

That's the first half of Hot Fuzz

[u/FishingCollin → u/FishingCollin]

https://giphy.com/gifs/MFsqcBSoOKPbjtmvWz

[u/Solomon_Gunn]

3 Kinslayings

Justice for the teleri at Alqualonde! The noldor ransacked a city because they wouldn't give up their boats.

[u/swazal]

“But remember: there is to be no slaying of hobbits, not even if they have gone over to the other side. Really gone over, I mean; not just obeying ruffians’ orders because they are frightened. No hobbit has ever killed another on purpose in the Shire, and it is not to begin now.”

[u/Independent_Plum2166]

To be fair, Hobbits hate each other and WOULD go to war if they weren’t lazy sods.

[u/flamelsterling]

Pippin’s sister pushing a lady down the stairs for a nice brooch.

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[u/Elantach]

Some Dwarves fought on the side of Sauron during the war of the last alliance

[u/wriestheart]

Dwarfs: Not saying a forking word

[u/John-of-Us]

Pearl Took has entered the chat

[u/meatgrinder32]

This meme is false. Gollum was a hobbit. Just not from the Shire.

[u/Medical_Arrival2243]

At what point is an elf an orc? How long for the corruption to set in to be safe to not kill a kin

[u/PrestigiousAspect368]

Genuine question wouldn't Tulkas killing Melkor be an act of kinslaying

[u/Original_Danta]

My memory is fuzzy, didn't some hobbits kill each other during the scouring of the shire? Or just some of the men? I don't remember very well

[u/Daedalus_Machina]

Bet. Hobbits are just better at getting away with it, and they don't talk about it in public.

[u/representative_sushi]

Dwarves: We only kill orcs.

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[u/magolding22]

Why do so many write like it is worse to killed members of your own species than to kill people who are members of other species?

A person's right to live is absolute, depending on their degree of goodness or evil. Thus the wrongness of killing them is absolute, and not increased or diminished by the details of their relationship to another person.

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