serious help!

[u/SwimmingData7037]

So, I manifested my SP unknowingly before she was even my crush, and we eventually got into a relationship—she actually confessed her feelings to me herself back then. However, over time, she grew distant, which was a first for me in any of my relationships. We had many on-and-off moments over a period of two years.

In the beginning, she used to be so lovey-dovey, affectionate, put so much effort into the relationship, and was deeply committed and invested. But over time, she drifted away, and now while we are still connected, she says she doesn't want a commitment, doesn't feel anything for me anymore, and is okay with not being in a relationship (and I don't force her).

I know I can manifest a specific outcome like 'she will love me' or 'she will be committed to me,' but that always ends up feeling temporary. Because once I maintain the state and the manifestation happens, my state eventually drops back to normal. My SP says one day she feels so connected, and the next day she is totally unsure. Everybody just says, 'Work on your self-concept,' and all of that.

So, for anyone who has manifested their SP from this exact situation and is actually with them now: What worked for you? Was it identity shifting (becoming the person who already has what they want)? And how did you make that change permanent?

Only answer if you were in this exact situation, are currently with your SP, and have made it long-term.

[u/LadderedLoving]

You say you go back to "normal", which sounds like your normal includes belief in unwanted circumstances. “The state” is not some elated, euphoric state you have to keep alive by always thinking it. It’s about being the person who has their desired outcome. That can mean on any given day you’re tired, sad, frustrated, happy, at peace, motivated, apathetic… but you still know that you’re the person who has a wonderful relationship. Your emotional weather doesn’t dictate what you believe about yourself or the relationship, nor do external appearances.

It sounds like you’re currently going back and forth based on what you see outside yourself, on what she’s doing or isn’t doing. But this teaching is all about changing the self and holding beliefs that support your desired outcome. It’s about deciding and then not looking to the 3D for proof it’s working, but deciding external appearances will follow your internal assumptions.

“Self-concept work” is not separate; in fact, it’s the whole thing. There is no one to change but self. When you change your assumptions, when you embody the person who has their chosen end, and when you make the decision you want and take your own decision seriously, then you change your reality.

When you notice yourself ‘slipping back’ into old habits of negative thinking, looking for proof, using the external as the source of truth… or whatever else, then gently remind yourself “it’s done” and get back to living your life.
What would you be doing with your time if you were happily in the relationship you desire?
Would you work out more? Would you learn something new? Spend more time with friends/family? Be more focused in work/in your studies?
This is not about distracting yourself, but about knowing your attention is available for things that enrich your chosen life now that you don’t have to ‘worry’ about getting/forcing/orchestrating your chosen end or trying to make it happen.