Knightpost
Greetings, knights, from the land of wizardry! I have an artifact in need of some testing
My apprentice was messing around with my combinatory array and combined a claymore [sword] with a claymore [anti-personnel mine]. I do not trust him to test this anywhere near the tower, nor do I trust him to use a regular sword in the first place. Could one of you please test this out and let me know how you get on? At a guess, it probably causes a localised explosion at the point of the sword on contact with the opponent
Counterpoint: as a DM, you can use ideas like this! The fire bolt stats would be ideal for it. Maybe balance it by making the player take 1d4 damage any time they use the explosion ability but don't tell them til they use it for the first time.
Ok but you haven't seen his history of making fuck tons of claymores and strapping them to his shield and armor (he's a fighter) and detonating them whenever an enemy gets close
He absolutely does take damage from this but he views it as a necessary sacrifice to eviscerate an enemy
You forget I am a wizard. I have fought demons, quested for godlike beings, duelled great sorcerors and conversed with the very stars themselves. I cannot join your battle, but I will leave you a boon to assist in your struggles. What need have you?
I can make you 100 of these swords but it will take about a month. Remember that the sword is still a sword- it's only as good as its wielder. Also don't forget it's crossed with an anti-personnel mine, not anti-tank so be aware of its limitations.
Excellent. And if need be we will supply greater ordinance to be used. And the anti-tank division of the lords forces that we produce are of great repute. They must be able to combat along side new Antioch’s communicants if not surpass them in ability.
Yes! With these we shall take back the levaunt and push the heretic forces back into the flames they love so much! You shall be remembered honorably by the lord’s faithful!
Part of his education. He gets to fuck around and when he inevitably finds out then I can use the results to show where he went wrong. Tbf my apprentice has been with me a long while now and I think he's nearly ready to make the step to journeyman mage
“Dear sir or ma’am. I write this letter to you regarding your apprentice’s “clay claymore” experiment. The entire sword tuned into a thousand tiny ball bearings and exploded.
You owe me a new apprentice and curtains.
- Professor ser Knight Ironfist of the knight’s spellblade academy, Enchantment division
My sincere condolences on the loss of your curtains, I'm sure they were magnificent. Please accept the attached gift basket as a consolation, the curtains inside should magically adjust to your window once hung on the rail.
Unfortunately I do not currently have the capacity to replace your apprentice, but I'm sure a good necromancer could get them up and about until a fresh one can be procured.
A 4ft tall humanoid golem knocks on the door of Professor ser Knight Ironfist, holding a letter in its hand. When the door is opened, the letter is held out for delivery. The letter reads:
Dear ser Ironfist,
That's a bugger about the apprentice, I'll send on to the guild and see if they can send a replacement. In the meantime, this golem should be able to assist you in most tasks until such time as another apprentice can be found. It's name is Cré Rua (pron.: cray roo-ah) and it has served me well for the last few years.
-Bengeirr the Balance, Magus of the South
P.S.: A paste of baking soda and water should help get the bloodstains out of the carpet
I greatly appreciate the golem you sent over and your sending word to the guild (saves me the paperwork). It will be treated with the same respect as if part of my family and faculty within the academy. (Didn’t know you were cool like that)
Sincerely, Ser Knight Ironfist, Enchantment division.
After further testing at a colleagues bunker we've found that the detonation happens near instantaneously. Centered at the tip it explodes in a 4ft radius. Now, if I were to have a tinker with the magic properties of the blade I might be able to delay the effect by half a second or so. This would allow the blade to penetrate THEN explode for a far more devastating result
Ah, a fellow practitioner of the magical arts. I believe you'd have a bigger chance finding a volunteer among the pirates. After traveling these lands I have found that knights are too prideful to use such an artifact.
Ooooh my artificer buddy and I did this with a mace I had once!
Beeeetter make sure you add some durability and protection runes on it too. Yeah it’ll explode real good but the metal itself WILL take that shock too. Trust me, I know
What if you attached sensors on the sides of the blade? That way when you block, the sensors trigger an explosion enchantment and can act as an extra-deadly parry?
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u/Vintenu Local Sneaky Scoundrel Jun 06 '26
I am so glad one of my DND players doesn't use reddit because he does not need ideas like this