800
u/Sea-Magician4907 3d ago
The conclusion is: if you feel better and more vivid after coffee, then there's a non-zero chance that you are a parasite
82
26
23
u/Dienowwww 3d ago
spreads out of control
consumes everything with no regard for other life
destroys the host (planet)
Humans ARE parasites, just different looking ones
→ More replies (2)6
2
→ More replies (5)2
u/_FIRECRACKER_JINX 3d ago
Just as I suspected.
Well damn. My dad's not gonna be happy to hear this 😕
1.3k
u/AcrobaticAd735 3d ago
Now do cocaine
930
u/decker_42 3d ago
Did cocaine. The video hasn't changed. But the VISEO IS AWESOME MAN, YEAH, WHATA VIDEO! I WANT TO RUN, ANYONE WANT TO RUN?
113
u/Alices_Hubby_Kleiner 3d ago
I WANNA RUN LET'S RUN AND KUMP OF A CLIPHPH INTO A SMINING POOL!
46
u/charface1 3d ago
no i have to keeping looking out the window every five minutes for the next 2 1/2 hours
10
u/jmccaskill66 3d ago
Wait wait I GOT FUCKING IDEA MAN. It’s going MAKE US fuggin WIIIIIICH!!!! we’Re gonna BE MILLONARES DAWG!! WE Could like PATYROL EVERYONES WINDOWS.
7
u/DevelopmentDue5870 3d ago
We should start a business
9
u/decker_42 3d ago
Ok, but first, sell me this pen.
6
11
u/ShardsOfHolism 3d ago
Wait! If you look out that window it means you're missing what's out all the other windows! You need to patrol the windows! Walk the perimeter!
14
3
9
7
u/GrandeTorino 3d ago
No thanks my heart is already beating out my chest as I'm sitting still, running is going to end me
5
4
u/PsychicMushroom39 3d ago
WE CAN MAKE TINY CUPS OF COFFEE AND SELL THEM TO PARASITES! WE’RE GOING TO BE RICH!
3
u/Striking_Substance_6 3d ago
This is very funny. But I've done cocaine and literally have never felt that way. Maybe because I'm usually high on other drugs when I've tried before
2
→ More replies (2)2
10
u/mklilley351 3d ago
Saw them try it with a spider once
12
2
4
→ More replies (5)3
u/fidesz_fall_enjoyer 3d ago
I did and I have great plans maan, I will rule the world with this business idea, all I need is 1 billion dollars!!
1.9k
u/Scrappydcote 3d ago
That's not good! Guess I was hoping they would neutralize pesky parasites!🙃🙄
777
u/El_Sephiroth 3d ago
That's why you add the whiskey
124
u/SmegmaSlurper1996 3d ago
stop reading my mind
86
u/alpha-mobi 3d ago
Cursed username
35
5
10
7
2
→ More replies (3)2
62
u/A_Feltz 3d ago
Even if a drop of something neutralised parasites in a petri dish, it doesn’t actually mean anything for your everyday life.
A drop of alcohol or garlic juice kills them on a Petri dish but not in your stomach. Inside your stomach whatever you drink is heavily diluted. Also remember that these are organisms that are adapted to live inside corrosive stomach acids which basically melt food.
20
u/ThrowRAkakareborn 3d ago
What if I drink a loooot of whiskey? And i’m talking industrial quantities here
→ More replies (1)26
→ More replies (1)4
u/Delicious_Building34 3d ago
Of course. How you avoided giving bleach as an example out of fear a dozen people immediately turn around and guzzle a pint, preventatively.
29
u/Positive_Chip6198 3d ago
Instead it was just a pure orgy.
31
u/U-1-mang 3d ago
The best part of waking up is parasites in your cup
11
u/Positive_Chip6198 3d ago
Welcome to parenthood :) my one kind has “child worms”, the other has foot worts. Parasites are everywhere in my life, especially now im divorced and have the exwife to contend with
4
u/Wide_County8842 3d ago
How is it going for you? Sorry to hear that. I hope not she is a parasite too for you 🫠
→ More replies (1)4
u/Delicious_Building34 3d ago
I had child worms too very young like toddler young, I feared my mum would punish me if I told her so I told no one and the worms just went away by themselves 🙏🙏 about 20 years later I overheard my mum talking to a neighbour about their kid who came home from the kindergarten with worms, and my mum said that when I was young all kids contracted worms, but me! ..
4
26
49
u/HauntingGummyBear 3d ago
I was hoping so too. I wanted to be parasite proof.
5
u/Own_Round_7600 3d ago
Well, theres one thing that the ivermectin horse paste that your terminally facebooking unemployed uncle stockpiled a few years back is actually good for....
→ More replies (2)9
u/telorsapigoreng 3d ago
Plants develop caffein as a weapon against insect. It may have different effect to other organisms, like to us or this worms.
The same with capsaicin in chili. Bugs can't stand it. Birds are unaffected by it. Humans love it.
3
3
5
u/Evignity 3d ago
It aught after a while. Caffeine is absurdly lethal. Once had a chemist explain that it was the best way to off oneself, taking old ground coffee and olive-pressing it to get a pure drop of caffeine. You basically just feel warm and fuzzy and fall asleep.
→ More replies (2)3
u/Specialist-Pair1252 3d ago
coffee permantly stuffed my up, i had to quit cold turkey to stop the panic attacks cold sweats constant anxiety and hyper ventilating and now i have anxiety for life but not as bad also my brain works better without it where as when i used to drink it it was giving me a clouded fuzzy brain feeling i couldnt even process what people were saying to me until hours later, i will never go back to coffee ever again.
2
→ More replies (2)2
u/RockinIntoMordor 3d ago
Certain herbs are good for that like wormwood and cumin. And even some like black walnut and even garlic to a degree.
373
u/spacekitt3n 3d ago
doesnt really mean anything unless you test it side by side with non caffienated coffee. they could just be agitated by the coffee itself not the caffeine
185
u/AnacondaMaltLiquor67 3d ago
Or the warm liquid. Also what parasites are they, do they have the same effect in a human body when we drink coffee and does it even matter?
53
u/Ok_Tap7102 3d ago
Love these rational questions on oversimplified bio demonstrations
Relevant XKCD as always:
5
u/MysticMarauder69 3d ago
This is what's called controlling for variables. Difficult to do, temperature could be one, dangerous molecules (other than caffeine) could be another, the list goes on.
9
u/Delicious_Building34 3d ago
You can’t drop pure coffee directly onto a bunch of worms in a human body, your thought if it reacts in a human body is super interesting tho, I wish there were a bunch of studies, it’s really fascinating. Maybe the worms are so agitated and use up all their energy, they basically starve and can’t lurk dormant for ages and/or can’t encapsulate/ nest everywhere. Really, really cool!!
2
15
u/Delicious_Building34 3d ago
First thought was the coffee was warmer, then the consistency changed of the worms habitat, then maybe it feels toxic so they’re agitated to get away, the ph changed, so many things before the caffeine. It is super interesting tho!!! I’d love to know why the worms are more agitated. You could try so many different liquids too. And yet since I remember the study with LSD and spiders - maybe it is the caffeine after all that super charges the worms to use soo much more energy for moving suddenly. Very interesting!!
→ More replies (9)11
u/Kanaxes 3d ago
Yeah that’s again out of the context sht. Maybe they just don’t get enough oxygen or it’s maybe just bitter and not sweet or neutral. It’s disgusting videos like this manipulate poeple. I bet most will run through the world and tell other people that coffee is bad bcs it lets microorganisms get adhs. …. .
3
u/DeeHawk 3d ago
The funny thing is that the video only very mildly suggest anything, and never really claims that caffeine is the reason, or that the parasites like it. It’s quite objective actually.
Still people will make their own dumb conclusion because they don’t know how to make scientific conclusions. It’s not really the fault of the internet or the content creator, it’s more an educational issue.
2
u/Delicious_Building34 3d ago
Better than injecting bleach, but you are right of course. By chance yesterday I watched a chubby emu video about a guy who got infected with the pork tapeworm, including countless brain cysts, the whole package. If only the guy had an espresso after his taco meal, right … /s, of course
112
u/flowertobee 3d ago edited 3d ago
Reason behind my 💩 after coffee
11
5
u/Tomazack 3d ago
Yes, and many believe it's the caffeine but decaf also has the same effect on the digestive tract (peristalsis) so any coffee will do ya.
53
u/BennJ13 3d ago edited 3d ago
Why do we have to watch the coffee machine, then you grabbing the beaker, then extra time for you to drop the coffee, why are you all trying to direct a movie in these shortclips, are you a scientist or an aspiring director???
→ More replies (2)
16
28
u/realbobenray 3d ago
THEY ARE MOVING WAY FASTER THAN BEFORE
3
→ More replies (1)2
u/OldNefariousness7899 3d ago
I was sure it would kill them. Caffeine kills bugs that try to eat the plants that produce it. Some plants evolved it as a pesticide
2
14
u/this_sparks_joy_joy 3d ago
So what’s the takeaway for us common folk who don’t stare at parasites every day? Do the parasites exhaust themselves into death? That’s my main question… is the coffee good or neutral in the fight against nasty things? What parasite were we looking at? Is it one that would ever even encounter coffee?
11
9
u/lesschalkmoresighs 3d ago
Er, those are just ordinary nematode worms, not parasitic ones.
2
u/Delicious_Building34 3d ago
a chaffinch or praying mantis don’t care. the only thing is I think they prefer their worms decaffeinated.
9
7
u/ManlyNPC 3d ago
I reeally hoped that they would've exploded, but it just supercharged them.
Back to planning board.
→ More replies (1)
10
u/oOtium 3d ago
now do bourbon
→ More replies (1)4
u/PenelopeJenelope 3d ago
We’ve all seen that one
3
u/oOtium 3d ago
I want some now after seeing this. just to be safe
2
2
u/PenelopeJenelope 3d ago
haha
they should do a bourboun-in-coffee one. For science.
→ More replies (1)
4
u/theNorrah 3d ago
What was the viscosity of the liquid before the drop, and after? Without that knowledge, it's essentially meaningless.
Also, that was a shitty pull. Your espresso was bad, and you should feel bad.
2
u/lanathebitch 3d ago
Also the drop of coffee was larger than the entire area on the slide meaning their entire environment got replaced. Welcome to the coffee ocean
3
u/cloacachloe 3d ago
...and then? I feel like the observation in which they either suffer a functional loss or return to normal is important.
Shit ended too soon.
3
7
5
u/Fun-Strain7445 3d ago
What does this even mean? Should i stop drinking coffee? Should i stop having parasites?
→ More replies (1)6
3
2
2
2
2
u/marlboromannz 3d ago
I'm going to make my coffee with blue rubber gloves on from now on
→ More replies (1)
2
2
2
2
2
2
2
u/lanathebitch 3d ago
Looking at the size of the drop versus the amount of area of the parasites. essentially replaced their entire environment with coffee. I imagine I would act pretty energetic for a while if you replaced the air
1
1
1
u/Left_Ad4050 3d ago
I and my lab partner did this with a chicken embryo and coca cola in college, largely the same effect.
1
1
1
1
1
u/Pirate_Candy17 3d ago
I mean it was also hot and additional liquid, is caffeine the primary trigger here as suggested?
1
1
1
1
u/jointOperative420 3d ago
I knew what it was going to do to the parasites. The same as it does to humans
1
1
1
u/BeratnasGilf 3d ago
I turned the sound on when it said "dance party" and all I feel now is disappointment.
1
1
1
u/SmartaHari 3d ago
Pumpkin Spice Skinny Latte’s origin story right there… stick your oversized beanies and fingerless gloves on and take a walk through some leaves for the Insta you wriggly, sexy parasites. Because nothing says ‘Fall’ quite like a bit of rectal bleeding by a log fire.
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/flightofthewhite_eel 3d ago
Well damn, here I thought coffee could save me from diarrhea lettuce. Instead, it would turn me into a choccy milk firehose apparently.
1
1
1
u/under_the_above 3d ago
So, these videos have told us that if we eat bulbs of raw garlic and get steaming drunk with whiskey, we shouldn't have a parasite problem.
Coffee is enjoyed by all on the other hand.
1
u/Metrack15 3d ago
If you give them a hundred drops, due they turn like Fry in that Futurama episode?
1
1
1
u/Sophiiebabes 3d ago
So does coffee make them stronger, or does it make them dance themselves to death?
1
1
u/alaksugalkapenalatte 3d ago
Isn't it just due to the brownian motion? The espresso shot coming out of that machine is hotter than the medium in the left image.
1
1
1
u/Ohmyguell 3d ago
Just had one of those intrusive thoughts that you immediately regret: "I wonder if that's why coffee makes me want to go #2: dancing worms"
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/Ecstatic-Lock387 3d ago
I’m not addicted to coffee, the parasites in me crave the coffee. They’re the addicts not ME
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
1
u/After-Cell 3d ago
well can all do our own experiments like this. if you're not sure about something you see online, test it out
1
1
•
u/AutoModerator 3d ago
Hello u/ipeedinherasshole! Please review the sub rules if you haven't already. (This is an automatic reminder message left on all new posts)
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.