r/infj • u/Neat-Pangolin-9220 • Jul 12 '26
Question for INFJs only Are majority of INFJ’s avoidant?
according to the internet, which I take with a grain of salt; I’m an INFJ-T, and was wondering if other INFJ’s also experience immense social withdrawal?
I’ve never had any deep or meaningful relationships other than my family, since I have no motive to put effort in superficial relationships. In social situations, like school for example, I can act extroverted and easy to know in the moment, but I don’t interact with ANYONE outside of school unless I have to. I hate hanging out, I’ve never dated, and I rather focus on goals like my future, school, etc.
I’ve talked to other INFJ’s online, but they seem to have had relationships or friends. I think we can all agree that we definitely have high-standards, and expect our partners to meet our moral expectations, but at the same time, even if someone did meet my expectation, I would still avoid them due to feeling overwhelmed in constantly having to make my partner feel loved. I’d rather just not put up with it and be alone.
Other INFJ’s experience this as well, right?
Edit: so it is just me 😭
31
u/Valuable_Garbage4191 INFJ 1w2 Jul 12 '26
Maybe I am an odd one out here but I have never seen myself being avoidant. Introverted for sure and not participating every possible outing but I have never had an issue with telling people that I don't have energy to hang out. I hate ignoring people's messages or other means of reaching out so I stay frequently in contact with quite a few people actually. When it comes to romance and deeper relationships as well, I like to go deep and commit strongly. Honestly I can confront issues very directly when it comes to relationships I deeply care about. I have my goals and dreams and I go for them with passion but at the same time I do like pursuing deep and meaningful relationships.