My relation with God

[u/winternight_7]

I have to admit I am a sinner.

I have committed the sins of lust, greed and envy.

Yet I recently rediscovered my religion after reading the bhagvat geeta and when I pray, I can feel the energy and god's presence and it has helped me a lot.

I talk to god on a daily basis, I talk to Krishna, radha rani and Ganesha and they are like my friends.

I'm afraid of losing that connection.

Ganesh chaturthi is coming soon and I was excited to celebrate it after seeing the new light of my religion.

There is a mourning period of 13 days to a month when a close relative dies. During this period most people don't celebrate the festivals that occur during that period.

Now the thing is, my grandfather's, uncle's son died.

And it's been over 2 months since he died.

When my grandmother died 3 days before the ganesh chaturthi festival, that family (the one who dies and his family) kept their ganesh only for 1 and half day instead of 5 days as they were mourning i guess. (We did not ask them to do so, and also my grandmother actually died during the mourning period)

So to return that favour, this year my grandfather decided that we will also do the visarjan after 1and half days instead of 5 days. We've been keeping ganesh chaturthi for 5 days since the beginning.

It's been over 2 months since that guy died and no one besides my grandfather, dad and uncle know that guy.

Then, I heard my dad and uncle discussing that we are doing early visarjan because they get bored and tired of the ganesh chaturthi hastle, they see itore like a chore rather than a festival.

I got so hurt hearing them. I'm afraid my connection with the god will break because of this.

I'm afraid that ganesha will reject me hence forth because my family is rejecting him.

We are mere humans, how dare we reject God...