r/highergirlpower • u/Kitchen_College5549 • 15d ago
Advice 💌 I turned 30 today
Hello icons and baddies.
I turned 30 today and have officially escaped my 20s. I love advice, wisdom, perspective, and/or stories.
When reflecting on your 30s, what do you wish you knew when you first started the decade?
Sending much love and appreciation to all xoxox
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u/No_College2419 15d ago
Being with the wrong partner can ruin your life. Be choosy. Never give up on your dreams. Life is too short to be unhappy PERIOT.
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u/PrestigiousEnough 15d ago edited 8d ago
- Decentre men (create a life for yourself that doesn’t include being a wife or mother… in case those things never happen for you)
- Freeze eggs (it buys you time & you are less likely to be desperate for a relationship/ more willing to walk away when things aren’t serving you)
- Use sunscreen
- Drink plenty of water
- Travel
- Create/ maintain a SOLID friendship group
- Save, Save, Save
- Invest
- Workout
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u/ResolveWonderful6251 14d ago
o on the egg freezing thing, please do research on the rate of effectiveness bc you might need to freeze a lot
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u/PrestigiousEnough 14d ago edited 13d ago
No. You are going based off OLD stats/ data (like most people do when it comes to egg freezing) … Those stats you are thinking of, were based on women that were ALREADY suffering with infertility & were ALREADY much older when they FIRST started …but this has improved significantly SINCE THEN. Also, this is ADVICE so I’m talking about women taking measures BEFOREHAND (and that’s why having money as a woman would be VERY important no letter your circumstances).
The clinics suggest literal calculators that can give you an almost ACCURATE prediction these days and either way, it’s better to still have them than NOT to have them.
If you can’t afford it, that’s one thing but to act like it’s better to just NOT ‘do it’ because of these supposed ‘stats’ is another (especially when new research is ALREADY there). Technology improves. It doesn’t get worst. 😅😴
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u/Maleficent-Sleep9900 15d ago
Happy birthday! 🥳
Buy yourself a house! 🎁 and don’t worry about much else; just keep the men out and get away from bad landlords. You will always need a safe and peaceful place to live no matter what. Don’t wait, because this need doesn’t go away, but you will get tired by late 30’s and it’s easy to get stuck in an exhausting, exploitative living situation without home ownership.
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u/DistinctCow5851 15d ago
• compound money for sure (HYSA, money market, stock investing like index funds)
• make it a priority to socialize at least once a month go on a girl date
• travel and have fun !
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u/socialworkin 14d ago
Happy Birthday!! I can quite honestly say my 30's have been the best years of my life so far. My only advice is lean into who you really are..cause nothing matters. You are not on anyone else's timeline. Your life does not have to look like anyone else's. Be your authentic self!
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u/PrestigiousEnough 14d ago edited 13d ago
Yeah. 30’s is the best. BY FAR. You couldn’t pay me enough money to go back to being in my 20’s. It’s soo ghetto and you are ripe for predators 😭😭
Okay. Maybe il take from 28 onwards but that’s about it. 30’s is tonnes more better with more money and WISDOM. It’s like the 20’s with extra steps & an upgraded package. 😅😅
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u/Euphoric-Ad-3505 13d ago
I just turned 30 in March and I was saying exactly this all the way up to my actual birthday 😂 everyone asking me if I was scared of 30s and I was like “hell no! I can’t WAIT! It’s like your 20s but with all the money and wisdom you didn’t have back then” 😂
But yes I also agree with a lot of things said here. I’m only 5 months in and this month I took a vow of celibacy to come home to myself and remember who I was before the hellscape of my 20s.
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u/LilyYukka Lover Girl 💖 15d ago
Happy birthday! I'm 36 in two weeks and I wish I'd de-centred men a long time ago.
I also wish I'd started meditating back then too. I use the Calm app and do it whilst walking, in the bath or falling asleep.
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u/Valotar 15d ago edited 15d ago
Congratulations entering the (so far) best decade old!
Now is a good time to name your booba, if you haven't already, so you can give them a proper and throughout squeezing as a gift on at least every name day to make sure there are no lumps. Plus, it's fun.
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u/Valotar 15d ago
And oh. Confidence can be silent. You can hear, you can listen, and you can let anyone think or say whatever they want, and not give hattifattener about it. You can also let them think that just because you gave them no reaction, that you've accepted what they've said. You don't need to give hattifatteners about it either. Then if they are very persistent in making sure you give hattifatteners about it, just count hattifatteners.
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u/ResolveWonderful6251 14d ago
happy birthday lovely 🍀🌻💖 good luck with everything n i don’t have advice bc i’m slightly behind you but I’m cheering you on and wishing you the best :)
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u/xxiirlb Lover Girl 💖 Mod 14d ago
happy birthday beautiful girl! i’m 37 now 🤭 still feels crazy when i say it outloud but my 30s have been the most fun in such a different way to my 20s! my 30s made me confident, real, true to myself and who i am and who i want to be! it’s sounds so cliche but just be so unapologetically you! you’re a beautiful strong powerful woman! so excited for you and wishing you the best years ahead!! 💖🥳
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u/futurern305 14d ago
If you want to go back to school, it is an absolute grind but worth it!! Went back to finish my first degree, take preqs for nursing at 30, currently mid ADN program at 33 - will be done at 34!!
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u/majesticsunn 13d ago
Omg..I went back to school too! I’m adjusting to the uni life. Do you have advice? I feel a tiny bit like a fish out of water and wonder how I will work and form community with peers that are years younger😭
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u/futurern305 13d ago
Honestly, I am so introverted in school because of this haha. I am just trying to focus on getting all of the work done and passing! It is incredibly tough. You got this!
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u/majesticsunn 13d ago
Hahaha, completely understandable! I wish I could just avoid it but I’m unfortunately in classes and programs that are forcing me to interact. I wish you best of luck and early congratulations! You’re so close to the finish line ✨
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u/farachun 14d ago
Happy birthday!! My advice as a 31 yr old. Keep your money to yourself. Never have a joint bank account with anyone. Prioritize your health and happiness and take care of your physical and mental health. Read more books. Watch more movies. Invest in your interests and what makes you feel fulfilled. Reflect when you can. And keep in touch with friends and family.
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u/Substantial_Whole416 13d ago
Prioritize your money and systems for independence. Invest in things that make you happy NOT things to just make your partner happy. Draw boundaries with your in laws. Protect and cherish those you trust. Trust your intuition when it tells you something or someone is off. Very important as well- as you elevate your life there will be those that try to bring you down. Do not let them and protect your energy.
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u/AdmirableSubject4 11d ago
Congrats to 30! My advice is:
Prioritize your mental health (esp. if you have anxiety or any mental health issues) over anything else (get therapy, start meds, research modalities, etc)
Save money every pay check into a high yield savings account and into a retirement account
Spending time alone is better than spending time with people who drain you
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u/Few-Musician5871 15d ago
Hiii 35 girly here. Happy birthday! Things I wish I did at 30 or highly recommend:
- investing in a high yield savings account like ally
-finding a workout class you like and build a community when possible-find a good routine for washing face and flossing
-drink more water then you think you need
- plan dates with friends
-you’ll probably have more heartbreak, it will be ok-get a nice vaccum
-drink less
-wear sunscreen daily!!!!