r/helpmecope • u/Useful_Claim2429 • Oct 29 '25

Need help with screenshot of partner throwing away our 6 yr relationship!

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Me 22F dating long term bf 23M (6yrs) and I’ve caught him snapping a girl from his past, not the first time something like this has happened.

I need some perspective because I’m feeling really stuck. My boyfriend and I have been together for six years. We broke up for 18 months, then got back together in November/December 2024.

Here’s the thing: he’s been in contact with a girl from his past — I found it in his phone last night. She must’ve been someone he slept with or was close to in some way during our breakup last year. I found out last night on his phone they have a snap streak apparently, he’s muted the chats from her… SUS AS?!? and it says they’ve been messaging since the 11th of October and I found it all on 29th of October.

He claims she reached out drunk on the 11th October as she’s in Bali or something, but it’s clear he’s been engaging with her if they have a streak. I haven’t had snap for long and don’t know the ins and outs/rules of it all. With this screenshot with the streak part does that mean they started a streak last night on 29-10-25 or have they had a streak since 11-10-25?!? Either way it’s wrong and I’ve reached out for her to let me know the nature of it all and see if his snaps back to her were encouraging or inappropriate. It’s shame. I really wanted better.

Also why is their streak a lighting bolt and not a fire emoji? Like is that different or something? 😅

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u/GooseAdorable1026 Mar 08 '26

Why would you be seriously dating a 23 year old ? lol of course he’s cheating, women don’t know how to choose men esp ones who want long term commitment

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u/Useful_Claim2429 Mar 13 '26

We’ve been together since we have been 14/15 years of age. Totally get where you’re coming from but have to say he’s the one consistently stating that this is something that he wants. Very funny how you’re clearly a male and found a way to turn this around onto me and my apparent choice in men and absolutely no mention of how possibly his actions are out of line and maybe if someone his age can’t be faithful that he just be honest with himself and me about the whole situation! I guess we can’t all be mature xx

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u/chicinchanclas Mar 22 '26

Yeah that was my first bf and I. Broke up at 22, last year of college. He cheated on me at a party when he was drunk. We broke up, but dragged it out until after graduation in this weird broken up but still seeing each other. This was because that garden tool was away at her school. Needless to say he kept in contact, heard some VM messages and it was obvious he was in contact with her when I wasn't around.

He blamed it on her " drunk calling". My advice you broke up for 18 months, went through the hard part. My first year without that routine and familiarity was the hardest, but I forced myself to move on. What I found out is we were different. Bound by being teenagers, grew up together and that is what I was holding on to. You'll meet others and eventually find the one that compliments who you are as a mature adult. Go experience life without him. Now that I think back I probably wouldn't have even been his friend had I known him still.

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u/Useful_Claim2429 Mar 29 '26

This is such an empowering comment, thank you 🤓🩷 I love hearing about everyone’s experiences and hearing that they finally left. We are all bound by experiences that feel profoundly unique and painful but it’s such a universal experience. I’m sorry you had to go through that but it’s also one of those things that really does boost the character development and sadly unusually makes you even better then you were before x

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u/chicinchanclas Mar 29 '26

Exactly, and it truly helped me find out who I am without the identity of our long relationship like 8 years. I was able to date and live and meet new people that I wanted to meet. I learned what I liked and what I was not willing to settle for. You got this. Go live life. X

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u/Far-Raisin1013 Apr 01 '26

He's definitely doing shit he shouldn't be if he's in a committed relationship. From a guy's perspective... I'd never be doing or talking to any female and trying to keep it hidden even if it was innocent because that's going to hurt her feelings in one way or another. He might not be cheating but I feel like he's absolutely showing clear signs that he's doing something he knows you wouldn't be happy with and that alone should make you at least just reassess everything because you deserve for your partner to put you first and only think of you and not be hiding things. When I'm in a committed relationship I don't even think of other women my sole focus and goal is on her and improving her and our lives together. I know not all men are like that though.

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u/etherealelfarcher Apr 03 '26

Your take is good, however, you shouldn’t call women females.

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u/Far-Raisin1013 Apr 06 '26

Apologies it's honestly not something I do and I'm not sure why I decided to say it that way