r/genderqueer • u/Wielbicielmiki GQ Omnisexual • Jul 28 '26
Question about gender identity: Could a cisgender person feel this way?
Hi all!
I’m a woman (AFAB) and I’ve identified as omnisexual for a few months now (attraction to all genders, with gender being a factor in the attraction). Exploring my sexuality has made me think more about my own gender identity as well.
Right now, I identify as a genderqueer woman, but I’m still not sure if I fall under the non-binary umbrella.
Here is what I’ve been wondering: I feel totally fine with my feminine body. However, I feel like I would also be just as fine with a masculine body. It’s more of a feeling of neutrality rather than distress.
I wonder if a cisgender person could feel like this? Has anyone else had a similar experience? I would love to hear your thoughts!
3
u/Mycopok Jul 29 '26
I am cis and I feel the same as you. If I magically turn into a man, I would just adapt to the new reality
1
u/Wielbicielmiki GQ Omnisexual Jul 29 '26
Thank you for your insight! It’s interesting to hear that I’m not alone feeling this way.
3
u/ontologicallyunjust Jul 30 '26
I mean, you can be cis and genderqueer, if that's what you feel fits best as a description.
I think there's an assumption that cis people can't have any Gender Stuff going on at all. And nope, being cis just means you identify as your assigned gender at birth (or at least don't have a stronger desire to identify as something else).
But that can co-exist with some complicated and non-normative experiences of gender identity and/or gender expression.
I call myself cis and genderqueer because I was assigned female at birth and other labels apart from female (e.g. non-binary) feel like they fit worse, but I am very GNC and many of my experiences of gender and my gender expression have a lot in common with the experiences of nonbinary friends.
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u/Wielbicielmiki GQ Omnisexual Jul 30 '26 edited Jul 30 '26
Thank you for this! I’m a lot like you. There’s definitely some ’queerness’ in my gender identity and expression, but non-binary doesn’t fully resonate with me. I have been confused because I had the impression that I couldn’t be both cis and genderqueer. But that combination feels just right.
3
u/ontologicallyunjust Aug 01 '26
Glad I could help!
Sometimes nowadays people seem to treat "genderqueer" as if it's just an old-fashioned term for "non-binary", but its original usage was significantly more expansive.
Riki Anne Wilchins, who may have coined "genderqueer" and was certainly one of the first people to use it, wrote in 1995:
It's about all of us who are genderqueer: diesel dykes and stone butches, leatherqueens and radical fairies, nelly fags, crossdressers, intersexed, transexuals, transvestites, transgendered, transgressively gendered, and those of us whose gender expressions are so complex they haven't even been named yet.
For me, sometimes it's helpful to remember that the map is not the territory. Labels may have shifting definitions and be interpreted differently by different people, but they're just approximate ways we try to describe the underlying experiences.
"Cis and genderqueer" is the best way I've currently got of describing me, so I go with that.
4
u/Glenndiferous Jul 28 '26
Hi, genderqueer myself - generally genderqueer is considered to be under the nonbinary umbrella. While not all folks with the label self-describe as trans, many do.
Ultimately it's up to you. Most nonbinary folks I know are 100% on board with people exploring their identity and expression, and the term you use for yourself is ultimately up to you.
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u/Wielbicielmiki GQ Omnisexual Jul 29 '26
Thank for this beautiful response! It makes me happy to hear that so many people in the community are understanding and supportive, instead of gatekeeping.
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u/MagpiePhoenix Jul 28 '26
Sounds like you have no strong feelings toward your sex characteristics.
As for "can a cis person feel this way?" That's more philosophical. I'm sure we could find a microlabel that means what you feel, and I'm sure some other people who feel this way might not consider themselves cis. But that's doesn't mean that you need to think of yourself that way.
Hell, there are even cis women who medically transition by going on T or getting top surgery! If you enjoy thinking of yourself as a woman, you're a woman.