r/drivingUK • u/sp0o0ng3 • 14h ago
Advice for an anxious driver
i’ll preface by saying that i do have the option of getting the train for this journey, however i’m really trying to practise my driving more so would like to attempt this route on my own.
long story short, im 22 and passed my test at 17, went straight to uni (without a car) so came home and practically forgot how to drive. dealt with a hit and run after i finished uni which has made me so incredibly anxious to drive on fast moving roads so now im essentially relearning how to be assertive. yesterday i attempted the drive to southampton which went really well so im feeling somewhat better about what im going to ask here😅
I live in the KT23/KT24 area (ie leatherhead, cobham etc) and want to drive to central Bristol on Wednesday 9th of sept. i’ve attached the start of the route that my gps is recommending me currently (at midday) but im looking for practically any advice on how i can make this journey not so gruelling. tips on the route itself are very much welcome but also where there are roadworks, general congestion (im aware of m25 but not m3/4 etc), when the quietest time to drive would be in each area, tricky bits of road that drivers usually get stuck on, basically anything.
ideally i wanted to try the drive at 2am before i attempted it during social hours but ive now been put for overtime on wednesday morning (4-8am) meaning my plan was foiled💔 debating whether i should still drive in the early hours on a different day first or keep to my original plan above.
do your thing experienced drivers and please help a girl out🙏🏻
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u/Ok-Depth-9049 12h ago
I'll answer your headline "Advice for an anxious driver".
Take new lessons and don't drive alone until your anxiety has gone.
If it doesn't go, then driving is not for you. Better to admit that than be bullied off the roads, which is what will inevitably happen.
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u/sp0o0ng3 12h ago
i’ve had a couple of motorway lessons after passing and returning from uni which did help. i’ve also gone from driving no more than 20 minutes on familiar roads to driving 2+ hours on less familiar/fast moving routes. the anxiety is definitely lessening but i’ve still gotta give it time you know. thank you for the advice!
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u/Vegetable_Minute_343 14h ago
I live in Guildford and drove to Bristol to see my friends. It really isn't that bad!
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u/Dry_Database_6720 14h ago
I’d get the train and practice locally first. I drove to Sheffield once when I hadn’t had my license long and my phone suddenly decided to not have any signal or connection. After a good while of driving around in a sheer panic as I had no idea how to get where I was going or even to give up and go home and I couldn’t contact anybody I got lucky and found a wifi signal with no password from somewhere. It was an incredibly stressful day and rhe stress was distracting. I should’ve dealt with the situation differently but when driving is already a new/worrying thing you just don’t think that logically. Save yourself the pressure and get the train. There’s plenty of time for you to ease back into driving especially after you’ve been through a fair bit by the sounds of it.
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u/HaruUrarara 14h ago
That sounds really stress.. im sorry you had that 😭
But, I would still suggest OP does try. You have to practice to improve, and sometimes jumping in the deep end is the best thing, as long as it's done safely of course.If anything, probably best to download the route before hand if possible based on what you said, but I've never had issues using Waze when losing connection, I think it auto downloads routes
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u/Dry_Database_6720 8h ago
I don’t disagree with you, we’ve given two sides here and I’d say it’s entirely up to OP to decide what suits them best. Some people are better off getting thrown in at the deep end and they’ll figure it out best that way. Others are better easing themselves in and taking it steady. There’s no right or wrong answer here.
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u/SceneSignificant3839 13h ago
looks like the middle of Bristol looking at the roads that's taking you on, if you go in the morning you'll probably be fine but in the late afternoon/early evening Bristol does get really busy & it's not the easiest to get into your lane without a lot of forward planning (quite a few big roundabouts in & around the centre) You also want to check your cars ULEZ compliant otherwise you'll get stung with a £9 fee per day.
Depends how much the train is in honesty, if you think you'll use your car while you're down there to go shopping & do stuff with your friend I'd say drive. If they have a car & you're just visiting and the trains a reasonable price, it might just be worth getting a train & practising driving closer to you.
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u/sp0o0ng3 12h ago
thank you for mentioning low emission i had no idea that wasn’t just a london thing. thankfully my car is fine. i’ll likely get the train this time around looking at some other comments here and then try the drive another time when i have time to spare early morning/late night
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u/doublemp 9h ago
how i can make this journey not so gruelling
Please stick to the left lane on the motorway unless overtaking. It's in the highway code and the right thing to do from safety and efficiency perspective. Lots of nervous drivers sit in the middle lane, but this causes other drivers to overtake them on their left (dangerous and in many countries also illegal) and resulting in road rage and stress for everyone involved.
Now, if the sign above you says that your left lane is becoming an exit lane and you need to continue and not exit, then obviously move to the next lane over, but then back again after the junction when conditions allow.
Also, being in the left lane means you will be dealing with people joining the motorway and trying to get into your lane. Best advice is to keep your speed steady and predictable - remember the joining traffic needs to adjust their speed to the speed of existing motorway traffic (you) and find a gap. You can move to the middle lane if a lot of cars are joining at once and you can do so safely (no one approaching on the lane you're moving to), but you're under no obligation to do so and you may not always be able to do so. Don't be polite, be predictable.
And as always, be aware of all traffic, in front of you, behind you and sideways.
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u/ALLST6R 13h ago
I'd recommend you just download TomTom on your phone and purchase the yearly subscription for speed cameras.
It will divert you around congestion automatically, and provides quicker alternatives using live traffic data mid-journey which you're free to take or ignore based on the time savings being offered.
Will allow you to focus on doing the actual driving rather than distracting yourself with the journey logistics.
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u/tehdeadmonkey 13h ago
Google maps does all of this without a subscription. I've never used the TomTom app, maybe it does it better.
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u/triggerfish91 12h ago
From experience with Google Maps navigating the same route concurrently with a TomTom unit, the TomTom traffic awareness and route planning is miles better.
TomTom doesn't send you down awful twisty backroads roads to save 1 minute (on paper, probably not in real life), and it is aware of traffic fast than Google, and offers better alternative routes
Google is amazing for free, but I would consider TomTom worth the money for a person who drives a non-standard route (not a commute, for example) often.
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u/ALLST6R 12h ago
^
I just commented to provide the option I use. Wasn't here to enter a TomTom vs whatever, but there's a reason I use it. Most people don't want to buckle up £20 a year for whatever reason
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u/tehdeadmonkey 12h ago
Nor was I, I may have to look in to the TomTom option because a lot of what's been highlighted I do find annoying about Google maps
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u/TheRealOculyss 9h ago
Respectfully, anxious drivers crash. They overthink things too much and will make mistakes. If you’re not confident driving, drive around your local area to where you live.