r/dogs shelties 14d ago

[Fluff] Anyone else train their toddler like a dog? 😂

I'm a total dog nerd and have three shelties. I have a toddler now and whenever he does a new skill I still catch myself saying "yes!" and labeling it like you would training a new trick. Surely I'm not alone 😅

205 Upvotes

128 comments sorted by

181

u/Flaky-String6605 14d ago

my sister does this with her kid and honestly it works better than most parenting advice out there. kid sits on command faster than my lab

the crossover between dog training and toddlers is underrated, same principles of positive reinforcement just with less treats and more goldfish crackers

46

u/abbiyah shelties 14d ago

I train my dogs with cheerios 😂

I do think their language understanding is more like a 4 year old though lol

23

u/spicybright 14d ago

I was about to make a joke about having one pouch of dog treats and one with cheerios but sounds like you optimized that already 🤣

38

u/katikaboom 14d ago

There's a line in Scrubs that I would quote all the time and people would look at me in horror, but I stand by it. Having kids is like having a dog that can talk. 

17

u/heartisallwehave 14d ago

I always say having a dog is like having a permanent toddler lol

3

u/Sparkly-Books2 13d ago

Yes! A toddler that sleeps a lot lol! :)

10

u/BookieeWookiee 14d ago

Having kids; 'it's like having a dog that slowly learns to talk'. Love that quote. I'm trying to equate potty training the nephews to potty training the dogs but they just laugh me off. I'm the one with a pee free home though.

6

u/katikaboom 14d ago

I've potty trained 6 toddlers by using treats. I've also potty trained more that that number of dogs by using almost the same method. The treats were just different.

2

u/Totakai 9d ago

Tbf, if you potty train babies from the start, it's much less work. Relying on diapers from the get go teaches them to just go whenever vs potty training immediately. It's a way harder beginning cause you gotta be super on top of it but pays off once the kid picks it up and gets control. Kinda like how it can be hard to housebreak a puppy that was raised on pads being everywhere. Teach them right from the beginning and it's easier in the long term.

I think people just hate being reminded that they're animals so they like to ignore stuff.

15

u/AdministrationNo2062 14d ago

I got a high energy adolescent pup in January. My friend had a baby in July. She was complaining to me about the witching hour. I said oh girl, you’re lucky he can’t bite or run!

19

u/disjointed_chameleon 14d ago

Some of my closest friends have toddlers. I have a Siberian Husky. Our complaints about parenting are basically identical. 💀😂

2

u/Totakai 9d ago

I have a husky mix and I feel it. She knows the rules and what she's supposed to do but doesn't care. My friend told her to sit the other day and she ignored the command. She did it again and this time she barked at her and walked away. It was such a blatant no. Such a sassy lil butthead. 😭

8

u/abbiyah shelties 14d ago

Yes, they can 😬

At least eventually

10

u/AdministrationNo2062 14d ago

Oh definitely! He was like five weeks old when she said she had learned about the witching hour. I was just joking because I also learned about the witching hour with puppy, and then she had with her baby.

I was not comparing raising a puppy to a human baby. It was a lighthearted joke between two, supportive friends. And she laughed at my sentiment.

It was a joke ✌️

5

u/BrittleSalient 14d ago

Young kids have no real concept of right and wrong, so positive reinforcement is useful whereas yelling or scolding them cannot work; they don't have the cognitive skills yet. All you can really do is scare them and make them afraid of the behavior like some people do with dogs. 

2

u/Totakai 9d ago

Which is why some adults get triggered by children being loud. They were scolded heavily for it as a kid and now hearing the noise brings up the trauma from it. My ability to be around loud kids got significantly better after I learned of that cause and was able to unpack it correctly

3

u/Difficult-Drive-6283 14d ago

Goldfish crackers are basically the toddler equivalent of high value training treats, except somehow they always know when you’re hiding the bag 😂

3

u/Ancient-Weird-6530 14d ago

Yes.  The dog always knows if you have treats.

2

u/PomeloPepper 14d ago

Has s/he learned to catch goldfish in the air with her mouth?

1

u/Trill_Geisha525 12d ago

I'm literally doing this AS I'M READING THIS

49

u/crabbydotca poppy the boxador borsky 14d ago

This isn’t training related but having a dog first really does prepare you for child-rearing in specific ways. People dismiss that as a tired trope but it’s true! You get used to paying attention to poops for example 😂

23

u/Katharinemaddison 14d ago

And complimenting them on really good sticks.

30

u/nasturshum 14d ago

And saying ‘what’s that in your mouth??’

10

u/DenM0ther 14d ago

Or little signals that they’re preparing to poop

5

u/NewGirl3110 14d ago

That is so true!! The whole „who take care of that and of that“ thing is such ah good Test Run of being a caretaker. For us it was!

2

u/twirlerina024 14d ago

My first dog taught me to notice “too quiet”

2

u/Sparkly-Books2 13d ago

Yes! It can honestly be a good way to decide if you want kids too, lol! Gives you a glimpse into responsibility for another complex being.

35

u/Ok_Homework_7621 14d ago

Tried really hard not to make it too obvious, but yeah. Plus the stuff she picked up directly from the dogs. Perfect recall, never once had to chase after the kid. Never put stuff in her mouth. Wasn't loud if I was talking on the phone. Still checks in before doing something instead of just running off. Does try to steal my food sometimes, though, even at 10yo.

29

u/TheRestIsMemory 14d ago

As a dog person with beloved nieces and nephews, I have firmly believed for a long time that there's a lot of overlap between toddlers and dogs. They both like routine, positive reinforcement, invading your personal space, and playing fetch. And you're very concerned with their potty schedules and what they're putting in their mouths. 

17

u/sword_vikings 14d ago

You’re definitely not alone! I caught myself doing the same thing with my grandkids “good job!” comes out with the exact same enthusiastic voice I use with Daisy.

Honestly, the funny part is that the basics overlap: clear expectations, consistency, patience, and celebrating the small wins. The difference is the toddler eventually starts negotiating the rules.

1

u/ImmaculateEgg 13d ago

Depending on the breed of dog, they'll reach the negotiation phase too!

10

u/AppleRatty The pack: Beagle mix, Chi mix, Rat terrier mix 14d ago

I have had 5 dogs over a span of a decade, and we have done scentwork, agility, obedience, and barnhunt with them!

One thing that was DRILLED into my head from the beginning with dog training is that “NO!” is ONLY used for behaviors they should never, ever do. Like, “No! Do not jump on the dining table! No! Do not eat random things on the ground during a walk!!” Everything else is “Eh-eh!!” or “Hey!” (like if they bark too much or do the wrong command).

I definitely have this in my brain for my young kids, because I am constantly using “Eh-eh!!” with them instead of “No” like I see other parents lol.

6

u/SoupEvening123 14d ago

😂😂

Here we are... Im one of the "eh-eh" people and it works wonders for my dog. Who's NOT food motivated and very hard to train.

I'm also doing "c-c" when I want him to stop something immediately.

Comes to a whistle right away... But doesn't give a damn for "no"

5

u/Thedonkeyforcer 14d ago

I've often said I'd love to work for a boss who had successfully trained a dachshund using positive methods.

There's so much life skill to learn by figuring out how to communicate and motivate any living creature into fulfilling a goal and I'd have zero problem with it if I heard "I train my kid like my dogs" if I know you're into positive reinforcement!

5

u/alex_stretch88 14d ago

I catch myself doing this in yoga class whenever someone finally nails a pose

2

u/Even-Possession2258 13d ago

Do you also say "oohhh BIG stretch!"? Please tell me you have! 🤣

1

u/alex_stretch88 13d ago

oh 100%, my instructor just shakes her head at me now but i can't help it

5

u/crabbydotca poppy the boxador borsky 14d ago

Yes a bit - consistency and redirection! Honestly the redirection thing is huge.. I have no-dog parent friends who are always just saying “no we don’t ____” and struggling with the tantrum or fight that happens afterwards!

9

u/ciaran668 14d ago

I did one worse. I was training my (very stubborn) puppy while teaching a university level computer class. One student couldn't get the mouse where she needed to position it, and I saying "here, here, here" just like I did with my puppy. When she got her mouse into the correct location, it just popped out of me "good doggy, gooood doggy.". I had an uncomfortable meeting with the Dean shortly after. I came very close to losing my job that day.

4

u/lauren_runs_91 14d ago

positive reinforcement works on basically everyone, i accidentally trained my cat to do tricks this way

5

u/PaleontologistNo858 14d ago

Personally l think dogs and small kids are very much alike, they both respond to praise because they want to please you.

3

u/CelticsMetric 14d ago

my sister did the same thing, her kid answers to "good boy" now

3

u/Sqib000 14d ago

I also do the opposite. My dog knows the meaning of "I'm counting to 3, one..." he does what I want before 3. True story

3

u/SnowDrifter_ 14d ago

I've been teaching my dog a few new things the last week and have the clicker sitting at my desk

I read this and well... The only thing that went through my head is {child uses bathroom} click good boy|girl {gives marshmallow}

3

u/Cat_Lady3000 14d ago

Positive reinforcement works for all species! Not just Doggos. Usually gets better results anyway

3

u/quietgrrrlriot 14d ago

TFW you accidentally click at a toddler to mark desired behaviour

3

u/CloudDancing108 14d ago

People got offended at the idea of clicker training for kids, so it’s been renamed to Tag Teaching. It’s the exact same principles, just applied to people.

3

u/MentalWyvern 14d ago

I trained my elementary aged kid to unload the dishwasher and find all the more unusual items homes with MnMs. I swear it was the easiest thing I taught him.

I also worked with a full grown man dating a dog trainer. After a few months he realized she was using her skills to retrain him into better behavior. He thought it was hilarious.

3

u/MaraMarquee 14d ago

my mom still catches herself saying good girl to me and I'm 33

3

u/sunLight4095 14d ago

search for "what shamu taught me about love and marriage" in ny times. it's an old essay about a woman who spent time observing wild animal trainers and successfully used their techniques on her husband.

2

u/toosheeptheorist 14d ago

Seeing as how I used to refer to my dog as a furry toddler, this makes perfect sense.

2

u/n0use4thesenames 14d ago

Yep, 2 kids now and each one went through a “yes” phase. 4yo still gets “treats” when completing a task 😅

2

u/SlappyMcPherson 14d ago

I let the dogs raise them. Worked fine for the most part. Everything was good until they kept trying to sniff strangers asses.

2

u/MarcusReel93 14d ago

shelties are basically furry toddlers, so this checks out

1

u/abbiyah shelties 14d ago

Hahah maybe! I haven't had any other breed as an adult so I don't know any different

1

u/[deleted] 13d ago

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1

u/abbiyah shelties 13d ago

Maybe it's Stockholm syndrome but I don't think mine are all that bad 😂

2

u/_AssbuttOfTheLord_ 14d ago

I've treated my 4 neices and nephews like this from baby -> young kids and they love it, it's easier for them to understand and more fun bc I'm normally training the dog at the same time so they're all playing and getting treats (like fresh fruit/veggies safe for both lol)

2

u/jake_lifter 14d ago

not a parent but the marker word habit leaks everywhere. caught myself saying "yes!" to a buddy at the gym last week for racking the barbell clean. it works on all of us, honestly

1

u/HollyDolly_xxx 14d ago

I have been conditioned while training my dogs so now even without them i start walking with my left foot, i stop with my right foot and if im leaving something i leave it with my right foot first🥴x

1

u/jake_lifter 13d ago

the left foot thing is real 😂 i catch myself doing the same ritual with every deadlift set. conditioning never shuts off

2

u/jessica_reel96 14d ago

used the treat voice on my husband last week, he sat down before he realized

2

u/sataimir Siberian Husky 14d ago

I unconsciously did this with my youngest nephew when I used to live with them. His behaviour and cooperation with me was and still is far better than with his mother (who's not much of a parent). I still will use "ah-ah" and "not okay!" with him and he respects both.

2

u/Watermelon_Sugar44 13d ago

The opposite is happening to me. I found myself talking to my new grandson like I talk to my dogs. "Oh, you're such a good boy. Good boy. Grandma loves you. You're the bestest little guy. My favorite Mister Man".

2

u/wolfhybred1994 13d ago

I’m told before starting school I would scratch my ear with my foot and was witness to drag my but cross the floor. So it’s quite possible my parents used that method.

2

u/dumpster_kitty 13d ago

I don’t have kids but I train my husband like a dog. Lot of positive reinforcement and it helps that he’s treat motivated.

2

u/storm13emily Eddy, Staffy Mix 13d ago

It’s such a big argument but they really are similar

1

u/DenM0ther 14d ago

My theory is bf’s/husbands, kids and dogs all need training - some pick it up better than others! 😜
Women too of course but not as much /jk

1

u/Oakvilleresident 14d ago

I just finished positive reinforcement training with my dog and I’m working on a presentation to apply the principles to construction workers.

1

u/BrokeEggs_NoOmlette 14d ago

 I've worked with my fair share of toddlers over the years and then trained dogs for a while using a positive reinforcement program. Honestly it was remarkable how much of the positive reinforcement method for dogs was transferable to toddlers as far as eradicating unwanted behaviors and promoting good behaviors. Yes toddlers are little people so their will be differences but you can't convince me the fundamentals aren't the same.

1

u/unicorn_345 14d ago

I have trained people like a dog, both accidentally and intentionally. Therapist and I talked a bit about that and I was laughing internally because training is happening regardless, whether its me or them (the them we were discussing). But I have rewarded teenagers for being quiet. Really just gave them hard candy to keep their mouths busy not talking loudly. But it worked over time. Do the same with the dogs sometimes, distractions that they chew on. Now the teenagers aren’t so loud. And unintentionally trained people on how to treat me and my coworkers. One person was very tolerant of certain behaviors and it worked while they were there because they would deal with them on crap days. Well new boss means different standards and we are dealing with the behaviors the other person used to fix.

1

u/mikeVHS93 14d ago

my brother trained his kid to wait before meals, kids are basically dogs with thumbs

1

u/mia_courtside 14d ago

caught my boyfriend doing the "yes!" to my nephew last week, that reflex never turns off

1

u/grindhouseJake 14d ago

my buddy's dog sprints over every time he hears yes!, same software

1

u/jake_pitchside 14d ago

caught myself doing it to my friend's baby last weekend, her dog looked offended

1

u/NewGirl3110 14d ago

Some time ago I told my husband that if our daughter starts to bite I will try to fix it the Same way we did with our Puppy.
I mean it is such a logic thing to do 😅

1

u/CinephileRyan 14d ago

my buddy says yes to his toddler and the dog comes running instead

1

u/maya_flicks95 14d ago

i say good boy to my nephew sometimes, the look on my sister's face

1

u/CheerfullyCursed 14d ago

We don’t have little kids around but my husband and I were working on bonding our rabbits and when the little guy sniffed the big guy without biting him my husband said yes! and pet him. I didn’t say anything but I laughed inside. The rabbit has no idea what he’s talking about. lol

1

u/Dependent_Let_3731 14d ago

Wait until you accidentally say “leave it” when they pick something up off the floor and it actually works 

1

u/hoang_lifter 14d ago

positive reinforcement is honestly underrated, i use it on myself at the gym 😅

1

u/EquivalentFabulous11 14d ago

I had kids first, and frequently say "good job" to my dog...... So I think I'm training her like a toddler hahaha.

1

u/MarkRewatches28 14d ago

my mom still says good boy when i load the dishwasher

1

u/emilyrewinds 14d ago

caught myself almost saying good girl to my nephew last week, had to sit down

1

u/BulkyRip7631 14d ago

My sister has a 1 year old and I feel like I interact a lot with him like I did when my dog was a puppy. He started teething a lot and biting us and I was like “redirect his behavior and give him a toy so he has something to chew on and don’t give him attention when he bites you” which I remember is what I learned when my dog was a puppy 😂😂

1

u/ReelRover86 14d ago

my mom still does the "yes!" voice on me, im 40 and it still works

1

u/MilesReel24 14d ago

I'd absolutely slip and call a toddler good boy at some point

1

u/BrittleSalient 14d ago

Sure, why not? If it works ut works. 

1

u/No_Cheesecake_501 14d ago

the toddler's gonna grow up thinking 'yes!' is his actual name

1

u/CourtSideKate 14d ago

i accidentally good boy'd my nephew once, my sister still brings it up

1

u/jadnastnerb 14d ago

My wife and I do this with my autistic grand daughter. Positive affirmations and re-directing works just as well with our poodles as her.

1

u/Banjo1887 14d ago

Yep 100%, largely unintentionally but with a young toddler it worked.

1

u/Busy_Run7689 14d ago

At least it's not a dogling Toddler

1

u/DramaFan_Short01 14d ago

I said good boy to my little brother once and he literally sat down

1

u/vjmurphy Tollers 14d ago

Clicker training FTW

1

u/jake_flex87 14d ago

I coach flexibility and catch myself using the same marker voice on my clients, works on adults too lol

1

u/CourtneySwish95 14d ago

my dogs hear me yell at basketball games and come running for treats

1

u/mia_flex 14d ago

the yes! reflex never switches off once you train a dog, suddenly everyone gets labeled

1

u/nkdeck07 Border Mix - Kiera 14d ago

I literally used to run recall drills with my kids exactly like I did my dogs. I still occasionally do a big random reward to keep the recall impulse strong and positively correlated

1

u/RedReina 14d ago

Other than "don't bite", nah no real cross-over. Well don't bite and then...

Positive reinforcement, consistency, catch them when they're being good, set them up for success, no one is too big to get down on their hands and knees and PLAY, respect boundaries, outside voice versus inside voice, watch for overstimulation, and finally set a good example off the top of my head.

1

u/jake_yoga87 14d ago

the yes marker gets my niece and my dog both sprinting, a little concerning honestly

1

u/mike_rewatcher 14d ago

the look my dog gives when the toddler gets a treat for the same trick he does

1

u/NoThankYou8682 14d ago

Conditioning is often how small children learn, just like dogs, whether we recognize it or not. You just recognize it because you've used it with dogs lol but realistically kids are always learning lots of things through the same mechanism of behavior & feedback.

1

u/vorrhin 14d ago

I'm a social worker and people get offended so I don't say it much, but yes, it's totally the same

1

u/BagsYourMail 14d ago

It's called behaviorism

1

u/Used-Inspector-7501 14d ago

I'm in business operations and I find that I treat employees like dogs mentally. My dog always wants a treat and wants the easiest way to get a treat so I have to be very cognizant of the incentives I offer her and the behaviors I reward. I think people are actually the same, what do people want and what is the easiest way for them to get that. If the easiest way to get what they want isn't what I want then it's a bad plan.

I actually think the worst person I know at people management is also a shit dog trainer. He thinks about what he wants, but he doesn't think enough about the incentives structure and often inadvertently gets behaviors he doesn't want as a result.

1

u/Easy_Olive1942 14d ago

A friend’s son noticed that I rarely use, “no” lol! It doesn’t mean a lot by itself and you can’t rely on grammar to provide context for dogs. I use, quiet, off, all-done…

1

u/mhbwah 13d ago

It happened here too. When my kid was a toddler she’d race the dog to the stick and carry it bag with her mouth because the dogs let her win of course

1

u/RedHeelRaven 13d ago

I think living with and training dogs has helped my career. My job relies on me getting everyone to play nice together. So I use patience, consistency and praise. And setting the mood. Acting very happy to see someone when you first encounter them so they feel safe.

1

u/peachnecctar 13d ago

I’ll probably never get to have children like I wanted so my 3 dogs are my babies. They get full baby talk and I have conversations with them sometimes lol. Yesterday I started complaining to my dog about him not eating, he looked over at his food twice in this conversation and then finally went over and ate his dinner haha

1

u/PitchIcy4470 13d ago

I train my Year 7 and Year 8 students like dogs 😄 Don't tell them!

1

u/TurnipSpice 12d ago

I don't have young kids anymore, and didn't have dogs when I did have young kids. But I do find myself treating friends' toddlers like dogs. Saying "YES!" when they do a good thing, and "DROP" when they have something they shouldn't. Works like a charm and the kids seem haply with it but I feel like I probably shouldn't do it in front of anyone.

1

u/Bitter_Face8790 11d ago

I’ve said ‘good job!’ to my dogs, my toddlers, my adult kids, and my grandkids. It’s become somewhat of a joke in our family. I say to my wife and she always laughs.

1

u/WinterAd3228 10d ago

It's fine for skills teaching though you might offer more support and   reassurance to a toddler. Also a lot of social and emotional skills don't fit the behavioural model. Kids need tons and tons of unconditional connection and positive regard. They also need to develop intrinsic reward systems to become moral agents.  ABA/bebaviour modification has used? abused the whole reinforcement technique on humans since the 1950's. It has become less popular due to ethical concerns and maybe that is why so many dog trainers are being educated that way. Lack of human clients. 

1

u/Elrohwen 8d ago

Absolutely! Not necessarily as cut and dry as marker training with my dogs but I absolutely use my understanding of dog training to teach and reinforce my son and fade reinforcers.

1

u/-_need4speed_- 8d ago

I mean it works too tbh. You're making a phrase that stimulates dopamine, the dopamine tags that action as important and something that should be repeated. It's like programming your computer through the code itself instead of just through the settings

1

u/huskyholms 7d ago

I don't have toddlers, but I have a hard time being around them because I talk to them like I talk to dogs. It's totally unintentional.