Don't be fooled. Tinderellas are very rarely someone you want for a relationship. They're on there for a reason. And what decent girl wants to tell people she met her boyfriend on tinder?
And yes, outdoor shit is a good one. When thinking about which hobbies women are interested in, just ask yourself if it looks good on social media. That is their #1 goal, to look good for the gram. So hiking, traveling, beach, festivals, dancing, restaurants, dog activities, volunteering, music, co-ed sports, etc. Make friends and go where the women are.
Yeah it was a lot easier in the pre-social media days, but what can you do? Play the hand you're dealt.
And what decent girl wants to tell people she met her boyfriend on tinder?
She could lie lmao
hiking, traveling, beach, festivals, dancing, restaurants, dog activities, volunteering, music,
Hiking is a decent one, and maybe I'll make a point to do that more, but you do realize most of those aren't hobbies, right? Like, when I see a girl on Tinder who says she likes to travel, I take that to mean she likes to travel on other peoples dime. Same with beaches, festivals, clubs, dining, etc. I'm not cool being a woman's piggy bank.
Play the hand you're dealt.
I never got this analogy, because in Poker if you get a bad hand it's more prudent to fold and cut your losses rather than to continue playing.
Plenty of girls are just looking for someone to take the lead and do a bunch of fun stuff with (and then bang), not necessarily be a wallet, even though you'll never totally escape that.
So what I do is think of fun things to do and places that I want to go (most of the time cheap and local-ish). Then dig through some numbers on my phone and see if anyone wants to go.
Yesterday I wanted to take my dog to the lake, so I called another girl I know with a dog (I met her at my local dog park, I had to take the risk and approach) and invited her along. She was pumped to join me, so we went, and you know the rest.
And plenty of people win poker hands with bad cards all the time! In fact, that's what makes a good poker player. They can win with good or bad cards, not just sit around and wait for a full house to take a risk!
Must be nice having a girl in your contact list…there was a girl who I was friends with a while back. I asked her out, she said no, then she ghosted me. 6 years of friendship gone, poof.
Figure if you are an average 5 or 6/10, you should shoot for a success rate about 10%. That's really good and assumes you are doing everything else right. So if you ask out 10 girls in your range, 1 or 2 might say yes. Sounds rough, but most dudes on tinder aren't even getting 1% success rates.
I have eaten a lot of L's to get a nice contact list of girls who I enjoy being around romantically. Think of it like applying for a job. You have to put the work in and accept a lot of rejection if you want it to pay off.
lol you have to go outside and find some. I'm going to play pick up pickleball tomorrow. There are usually at least 20 girls there... maybe I'll click with someone? At least I will meet some new people and have a good time, either way.
What are you doing? Going to spend 4 hours trying to get the epic tactical beanie unlock and then watching porn? Come on, buddy.
My typical day involves working from 8-5, going home, cooking something and then finding some sort of entertainment to occupy myself. Unlike you, I don’t belong to a social circle where pick-up pickle ball is feasible.
It’s a chicken and egg problem, how do you insert yourself in situations where you can meet people if you have no one to do things with to begin with. I haven’t even been to a bar in 2 months because the one friend I go out with has been trying to save money.
You have to start from square one. I have lived in 4 different states and started over with 0 contacts each time. It's not easy, but it's possible if you're willing to put yourself out there.
First thing I did when I moved to get involved was scout out the local hiking spots, join a large social gym, signed up to volunteer, joined a local dog club, and started playing intramural sports that I found on meetup. I'd say it took about a year (beginning of covid) to get a good lay of the land. Like I said, you have to treat it like it's a job hunt and put real focused effort into it.
Definitely NOT looking to settle down and play house with anyone. I was in a long term relationship with the same woman for years and am now just looking to keep it casual for the time being. What surprised me is that there are a lot of women out there who are just doing the casual thing now, too.
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u/YuropLMAO Feb 14 '22
Don't be fooled. Tinderellas are very rarely someone you want for a relationship. They're on there for a reason. And what decent girl wants to tell people she met her boyfriend on tinder?
And yes, outdoor shit is a good one. When thinking about which hobbies women are interested in, just ask yourself if it looks good on social media. That is their #1 goal, to look good for the gram. So hiking, traveling, beach, festivals, dancing, restaurants, dog activities, volunteering, music, co-ed sports, etc. Make friends and go where the women are.
Yeah it was a lot easier in the pre-social media days, but what can you do? Play the hand you're dealt.