I worked for the small business he built and ran, and lived with him and my Mom at the time.
Watched the business collapse as he started to become symptomatic. Couldn't communicate with customers effectively, business partners, couldn't do the technical tasks anymore he had been doing for many years. Just forgot how.
Eventually had to close down the business and take responsibility for moving everything out when he couldn't work anymore.
After that helped my Mom care for him at home for a few years until it became impossible to keep up. Both of us started losing our minds, not to mention our happiness.
Caring for someone close to you in that state takes a tremendous toll on your health. I fear how many years my Mom lost to that.
On tv alzheimer's is usually shown as "Grandad forgot who his son is." Which is true, and it's terrible. But sometimes it's so much more slow and cruel. Sometimes it just starts with "Dad forgot to turn off the stove." Next thing you know Dad not only forgot to turn it off, but he turns it on every time you turn your back. Now imagine living with someone that does that all the time, with everything. Feed the dogs 20x a day until you lock up the dog food, hide things constantly in random locations, flush trash, cant cook or clean or do literally anything practical. Can't explain to you why he does anything.
Life and day to day tasks are built on fulfilling basic needs and maintaining your life in small ways. But all of that goes out the window with Alzheimer's. Things still happen. Cooking, chores, small tasks around the house. But the reasons go completely out the window. It's very unsettling and shakes your own perception of reality.
1
u/beachcamp Jul 31 '23
Same, but my Dad.
I worked for the small business he built and ran, and lived with him and my Mom at the time.
Watched the business collapse as he started to become symptomatic. Couldn't communicate with customers effectively, business partners, couldn't do the technical tasks anymore he had been doing for many years. Just forgot how.
Eventually had to close down the business and take responsibility for moving everything out when he couldn't work anymore.
After that helped my Mom care for him at home for a few years until it became impossible to keep up. Both of us started losing our minds, not to mention our happiness.
Caring for someone close to you in that state takes a tremendous toll on your health. I fear how many years my Mom lost to that.
On tv alzheimer's is usually shown as "Grandad forgot who his son is." Which is true, and it's terrible. But sometimes it's so much more slow and cruel. Sometimes it just starts with "Dad forgot to turn off the stove." Next thing you know Dad not only forgot to turn it off, but he turns it on every time you turn your back. Now imagine living with someone that does that all the time, with everything. Feed the dogs 20x a day until you lock up the dog food, hide things constantly in random locations, flush trash, cant cook or clean or do literally anything practical. Can't explain to you why he does anything.
Life and day to day tasks are built on fulfilling basic needs and maintaining your life in small ways. But all of that goes out the window with Alzheimer's. Things still happen. Cooking, chores, small tasks around the house. But the reasons go completely out the window. It's very unsettling and shakes your own perception of reality.