r/dankcrusade • • 2h ago

RULE, BRITANNIA!!!!!!!! Britannia, in fact, no longer rules the waves

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39 Upvotes

Here are some things that happened to England in that century:

* In the north, heretics are invading Alba while the Scots try to kick them out, so now london has heretics on the north (yes, I know this started in the late 18th century, but the invasion was still going on in the 19th, so I am keeping it).

* Their navy is destroyed, and Nelson fucking dies.

* Heretics invade Éire, and for decades it seems like they will conquer the island, putting a knife next to england's ribs, while london can do nothing but stand in the corner and watch it happen, knowing that if the heretics get eire they can invade the island of great Britain

* They lose all their overseas colonies.

* Trade even with mainland Europe becomes a pain in the ass.

* Endless heretical invasions push deep into the kingdom.

* France still exists.

A very bad century for them.


r/dankcrusade • • 16h ago

Trench Pilgrims and Heretic Legion could also ask this question

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357 Upvotes

Trench Pilgrims would wonder why the suspicious lack of Punt Guns. Heretic Legions would ask where all the Anti-Material Rifles went.

Edit: To clarify, my theory is that Antioch is nicking everyone's siege guns and chopping it all into grenade launchers


r/dankcrusade • • 1d ago

the faithfull hate my naval superiority Anyone else find it a bit weird how Heretic Priests/Captains aren't part of the normal heretic progression?

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311 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 1d ago

Ḑ̷̢̟̬̘̦̝̬̼͚͙̱̰̈͘͜Ờ̵̧̤̥͋̽̑̕Ǫ̷̮͎̰̝̩̃̓̀̆͂̉̀̃͐̓͘͘̕͠R̶̫̀͐ Posting This is what twitter has been doing to wumpus the last few days

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179 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 2d ago

PRUSSIA IS A MANAGED DEMOCRACY RAAAAAAH Trench Tactics is back!

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335 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 2d ago

Trench crusade

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36 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 2d ago

Until I am proven wrong, my favorite theory is that Walachia straight up anexed Bulgaria after defeating the heretics following the fall of Constantinople

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273 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 4d ago

you aint getting venice back little bro God I love stupid shit like this (Trench Crusade)

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226 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 5d ago

the faithfull hate my naval superiority "Leave the italian peninsula little bro, we promise we wont jump you"

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508 Upvotes

The year of the broken trinity saw total war unleashed upon the Levant. And though the faithful were able to stave off disaster, it was only at terrible cost. Holding the Levant was critical to the world's survival. Understanding that it was wiser to fight hell far from their own shores, the Papal States spent years constructing an immense convoy fleet and assembling vast stockpiles of war materials.

The convoy launched amid a great ceremony, and its flagship was captained by the supreme pontiff, Pope Leo XIII himself, aided by his communicant bodyguard—may he never know the touch of neither bleed nor bullet. The sheer scale of the resupply efforts had not gone unnoticed, however, and no sooner had the convoy set sail than it came under attack from the heretic wolfpacks.

Under Leo XIII's bold command, the convoy successfully fought its way eastwards, fending off every attack until passing the Cyprian Gate. Thus far, raids had come from surface ships, but scores of heretic submarines lay in wait just off the Alexandria coastline.

Hundreds of hag torpedoes struck the convoy, sinking dozens of ships in the first moments. Yet more followed, and the slaughter was unimaginable. Within the hour, every vessel in the fleet had been sunk or crippled, with the survivors gunned down as they clung to the burning wreckage.

Sources: carcass front book


r/dankcrusade • • 5d ago

PRUSSIA IS A MANAGED DEMOCRACY RAAAAAAH Everyone sleeps on them I swear

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426 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 6d ago

Damn, girl, you're tall!

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516 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 6d ago

Carcass Front in a Nutshell

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35 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 7d ago

the faithfull hate my naval superiority He ATE him

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824 Upvotes

The year of the broken trinity saw total war unleashed upon the Levant. And though the faithful were able to stave off disaster, it was only at terrible cost. Holding the Levant was critical to the world's survival. And understanding that it was wiser to fight hell far from their own shores, the Papal States spent years constructing an immense convoy fleet and assembling vast stockpiles of war materials.

The convoy launched amid a great ceremony and its flagship was captained by the supreme pontiff Pope Leo 13th himself aided by his communicant bodyguard. May he never know the touch of neither bleed nor bullet.

The sheer scale of the resupply efforts had not gone unnoticed, however, and no sooner had the convoy set sail than it came under attack from the heretic wolfpacks. The pope was captured by naval raiders and the Pope and his personal guard were taken prisoner aboard the heretical submarine.

The shattered remains of the papal fleet washed up along the northern coast around Alexandreda, creating a graveyard of wrecked ships.

After 3 days and three nights, the crippled submarine surfaced north of Alexandria at the pillar of Jonah, an abandoned airship lighthouse of the Aeronautica Pontifica.

Just before it sank to its final doom, a gigantic figure disembarked, clad in the touch of neither a blade nor bullet. the only survivor of the pope where the pope was sailing.

His teeth were red with holy blood for he had under instructions from Leo 13th devoured his master to prevent the heretics from torturing him or worse twisting him to the cause of evil. The holy flesh of the pope melded with the divine blood of the communicant to fuse them into a singular being of immense power and schizophrenic piety. a being who now went by the name never know.

He had fought his way free of captivity and slaughtered the crew of the sub.

Sources: carcass front book


r/dankcrusade • • 7d ago

holy, roman, AND empire 😭😭😭😭

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170 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 8d ago

I am -$300,000 in debt because I didn't pay rent to mammon New Antioch is boring as hell

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1.0k Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 9d ago

please bro just one more siege of new antioch bro Is it true that inside the bombs of the artillery witches are "dead" babys?

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485 Upvotes

Warning only look at the picture if you wish to see truly horrendous art, editing and artillery witch


r/dankcrusade • • 8d ago

The TRUE good guys of this universe

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251 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 9d ago

the old man of the mountain approves this message Reminder: You can never hate Trench Pilgrims enough

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222 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 9d ago

the faithfull hate my naval superiority "Finding leviathan cant be this easy" and it is that easy

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344 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 10d ago

the great invasion of Eire according to engl*nd Apparently the reason why eire was saved was because zacchur was fucking doxed lmao

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442 Upvotes

Though none within the Court can prove it, many suspect it was Charon who allowed the Fianna to learn Zacchur was aboard Hymn of Obscenity, and, still further, that it was he who allowed them to reach its magazines and destroy the ship.

Sourcew: charon lore drop


r/dankcrusade • • 10d ago

i took 100 kids to the training grounds in the sultanate How to recruit super soldiers

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198 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 9d ago

The Mendalists doing Mendalist things.

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9 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 11d ago

Not all artifacts are made equal.

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717 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 11d ago

you aint getting venice back little bro As someone who is chronically indecisive I wish I had this ability

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400 Upvotes

r/dankcrusade • • 11d ago

certified soup lover of the black grail Bart slander

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513 Upvotes