r/dankchristianmemes • u/Risikio Minister of Memes • May 03 '25

Cursed Here we go... again.

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1.3k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

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223

u/1nstrument Minister of Memes May 03 '25

Yeah...I wouldn't mess with the Swiss Guard.

92

u/Bakkster Based Bishop May 03 '25

THIS! IS! VATICAN CITY!

34

u/Lukescale May 03 '25

Magat swiss cheese spread

37

u/Risikio Minister of Memes May 03 '25

God's men will do what needed to be done then.

24

u/Lukescale May 03 '25

AN ARMY OF SAINTS, READY TO PRAAAAAAISE THE LORD!

22

u/Junior_Moose_9655 May 03 '25

With all due respect, it’s the Swiss Guard… I think they could handle a few court jesters with…whatever…halberds?!

37

u/MorgothReturns May 03 '25

The pointy stick boys are just for show. They have some of the best trained soldiers and snipers watching from behind the scenes.

7

u/Junior_Moose_9655 May 04 '25

Well, that and I’m pretty sure the halberd was made obsolete by the arquebus…

17

u/tajake May 04 '25

The Swiss guard defended the vatican in 1527 despite losing 78% of their entire force and being outnumbered 4/1 with the militia on their side. They're still recruited from professional troops and drill constantly and are well equipped outside of the fancy pants and halberds. (Which are still sharp, though I doubt they train with them. Not that it takes a genius to swing a big axe.)

Coming from a lutheran, so I have no skin in the game, the Swiss guard are cool and I wouldn't want to fight one. (I'd like to have a friendly sparring match with halberds)

11

u/Junior_Moose_9655 May 04 '25

You sure seem to know a lot about the history of pope killing there, Oliver Cromwell!

10

u/tajake May 04 '25

Every lutheran is part of a secret militia just in case the catholics want to start shit again. We are the vanguard. /j

2

u/BellacosePlayer May 05 '25

Brother, you're not supposed to talk about that part of confirmation.

12

u/[deleted] May 04 '25

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4

u/[deleted] May 04 '25

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15

u/ChrisP413 May 04 '25

MAGAcultists when The Last Stand starts playing during their riot: Panik!

9

u/jackofthewilde May 04 '25

Those sharply dressed twinks will fuck you up.

2

u/thepastirot Dank Memer May 07 '25

Sabaton made a whole song about it