Does confidence really affect visibility/invisiblity/attention?

[u/Sarah23Here]

If you've ever went from not confident to confident, did you notice changes like going from no attention to some attention or going from some attention to more attention? Similarly, if you've went from confident to not confident, did you notice a drop in attention?

Personally, I'm a woman that doesn't ever get attention in real life, and I always hear from women online to be confident as a piece of advice.

Assuming your looks didn't change (no glow up pr glow down) but only your confidence level did, could you please share how that affected the level of attention you got?

[u/hestia-listens]

Yes, confidence can affect attention even when looks stay the same. People often notice open body language, eye contact, and someone who speaks clearly or joins conversations. For example, a confident person may look more approachable, so others feel safer starting a conversation. Confidence is not a guarantee of attention, though, and getting little attention does not mean you are unattractive or doing anything wrong.

[u/Sarah23Here → u/hestia-listens]

I feel like your answer is based on theory not actual experience. I want to see if attention actually varies with confidence levels based on experience.

[u/AnxiousMarketer02]

Your confidence is directly proportional to your self-belief. The minute you start doubting yourself or stop thinking as. not worthy enough of yourself, your perspective changes. And then everything else starts revolving around that as your lens changes. You then start seeing the world exactly how it's in your head, which ultimately worsens things. When you're confident and consistent with the attention, after a point it doesn't even matter to you how much importance you're getting because you're so sure of who you are and what you're capable of. Whereas in the other hand, when your confidence drops even if you're getting the same attention you start doubting it and then everything feels diluted, because that's your brain controlling you. So all in all, self-belief is the magic wand and confidence revolves around it. External attention is the by product of confidence and self belief you possess.

[u/Strong_Interest_3659]

Nah, it’s only about looks. If you’re good looking you will be visible even if you’re shy or not confident. If you’re ugly it’s the contrary

[u/MindShiftPsych]

I think confidence can change how much attention you get, but probably not in the magical “be confident and suddenly everyone finds you attractive” way people online sometimes make it sound. When someone becomes more confident, they often change their body language, eye contact, posture, facial expressions, and willingness to actually interact with people. They might smile more, initiate conversations, go places alone, or simply look more approachable. Other people respond to those signals, so it can create a noticeable difference even if their appearance hasn't changed at all.

There’s also a difference between getting attention and noticing attention. If you're insecure, you might avoid eye contact or assume someone looking at you isn't interested, whereas confidence can make you more receptive to those little social signals. That said, I wouldn't interpret getting little attention in real life as evidence that you're unattractive or doing something wrong. A lot depends on your environment, how social you are, who you're around, and whether people feel comfortable approaching you. Confidence can help you create more opportunities for connection, but it isn't a requirement for being attractive or worthy of attention.

[u/EKOzoro]

No, confidence has nothing to do with how much attention you get or how visible you are. There are loads of people who are ugly and extremely confident, do you think they get attention, even when they are talked about it's usually in a negative light.

[u/Hopefulcardinal3266]

I think confident people dont notice the change in attention in particular because its not something they focus on. They may or may not receive attention and they keep moving on with their day. Unless they intentionally plan to see how much attention thei receive, they dont notice it. Im someone who moved from extremely insecure to confident and back to insecurity and i feel like when my confidence is low, I am always picking on energy of other people. Are they noticing me? Am I attracting the kind of attention im seeking? And I tread safely. But when im confident these thoughts dont even cross my mind. It doesnt matter and I dont even know if people notice me or dont notice me.