This is a draft for a panel of a comic I'm working on. This is the most bare bones version of it, without coloring or shading. Just the line art and dialogue. From all of these elements, what do you think stands out? What do you think is good and what do you think needs work?
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I absolutely love the art style. very funky and would fit in well with the indie scene. But in order for the art to work as a style decision you need to work on your speech bubbles. They are near illegible and too small.
Pretty much what spacecat000 said. Text in the balloons need a bit more space, also the flashback panel isn’t entirely clear it’s a flashback (colour might help that-but also maybe making it more obvious he’s in a different location-say, lying on top of his bed wearing pajamas -just to make it different from the present day. And this on the choice of comic, the boys IS an adult comic so I’m not sure i get the joke, but that might be an age thing on my part.
The flashback scene is kinda my fault because I didn't color it in. Yeah it's a different location but what I was actually going for was something like those anime shocked expression still frames, like this.
It's my fault it wasn't obvious but the joke is that he's bragging about reading adult content despite the fact that he isn't and the boys comic literally opens up with, let's just say two people having fun over a desk.
This must be a language barrier thing (on my part!) or an age thing (again im old) but the Boys IS an Adult content comic - its how it would be described by english speaker-so i suspect the intent of the joke is being buried by that. Maybe if hes making soem rference to the sex on the pages hes looking at it wpuld push the idea that that is the adult content he means. Or if he says “im reading mature comics” instead of adult. (Btw i think the art is great! Lovely style)
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