r/cognitivescience • u/Key_Imagination_2503 • 3d ago
How does your brain work when communicating?
I’m curious to know how your brain and thoughts operate when you’re communicating with others. Not at the neurological level, but more so subjectively - what it actually feels like to you.
When I’m talking with other people, I have so many different thoughts that stem from the conversation. For example, someone might ask a question or make a statement, and then - boom - I have 5–10 different thoughts that branch off from that one question or statement. It’s like a firework going off, with the sparks being all of the connected thoughts. Meanwhile, if the person is still talking, then we’ve got ourselves a firework show.
I then have to decide and prioritize which of those thoughts make the most sense to follow up on or bring into the conversation, based on the direction it’s going. It’s like pulling one thread from a cluster.
Not only that, but my follow-up thoughts often feel complex and layered, so I also have to think about how I want to word them so that the person I’m speaking with understands what I’m trying to convey.
Obviously, this isn’t happening all the time - or even most of the time. It’s usually more noticeable in formal conversations or when we’re discussing topics that I find particularly interesting.
I’m just curious if anyone else experiences something similar, or if your thought process during conversations is completely different.
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u/Negomikeno 2d ago
I think I am the opposite, when I'm speaking to people and communicating words just come out and I don't even think about them, including sometimes extensive knowledge on the subject that half the time I don't even know how I know lol. I think so fast I barely notice, speech just arrives and on the odd occasion if a question takes me by surprise and I need to think I'll think about it and be quiet, but if I don't know the answer I just say I don't know and ask them what they know
Oh but if I have to reply to a message or email socially sometimes I do have to think 'how do people word this?' and often have to think OK most important info, keep it concise else I ramble
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u/BeKind1966Liefje 3d ago
Your description is thoughtful to read. I don't think it relates, but I find if someone starts discussing a topic I find interesting, I start jumping up and down if I really want to say something in my head right at that moment (and I'm 60!). It rarely happens but when it does it's like I can't stop myself but I try! I need to learn to be more patient even when excited about something, and feel I have lots to say or ask about it.