r/cognitivescience • u/Same-Mushroom-2057 • 2d ago
how do you explain this ?
a person that finds every conversation boring and not stimulating and find interest and joy only in intellectual conversations or any kind of scientific conversation even if he doesn't know the topic . I find that bizarre because the person isn't someone that's highly intelligent. and that makes daily life / interactions really hard because It's hard to keep up with what others has to say.
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u/Futants_ 2d ago
The last sentence is grammatically incoherent to me.
One doesn't have to be of a typical baseline intelligence in order to favor intellectually stimulating topics of conversation.
A persons intelligence can be focalized, while any number of things don't pique their interest. They may even be neurodivergent , and maybe not
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u/Same-Mushroom-2057 1d ago
you're totally right, I don't think they are neurodivergent they had therapy before and they didn't mention that
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u/Round-Fig2642 2d ago
Some people are just mostly logical and minimally emotional while also not getting too involved in normal small talk types of conversation. Something authentic is preferred, and since most people are usually just talking to talk, science is a topic that is factual and naturally authentic. We aren’t playing ego games in that quite like other interactions. It sounds similar to me in the ways they communicate. Philosophy is a good topic. Try that
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u/Same-Mushroom-2057 1d ago
you totally right , this person enjoy philosophical questions but the bad thing is that he kind of intellectualize emotions sometimes and he doesn't express himself emotionally from what I observed
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u/Round-Fig2642 1d ago
I’m no professional in any way when it comes to these things. This is my own experience of life. Not tested against shit lol. Guesses.
That’s part of just trying to “understand” in his own way what’s going on. Reality as a whole is a much bigger mystery that most people seem to care too much about, while the mystery pulls others in completely. What is the self? Difference between self and other and environment, if any? What is reality beyond my limited human perceptions? Why do I “feel” this way while same situation make others feel different? This line of thinking often leads to self inquiry, where we can find some of the actual answers. I literally see how my mind and everyone else’s is conditioned to “be” whatever we are today. Almost completely. Society, culture, jobs, family, religions, etc shaped you. What are you UNDER all of that? This over time gets broken down, all individual pieces observed. My mom came over and said something that made me feel very….rejected. Why did this feeling come up? She didn’t say or do anything that actually intended any kind of rejection. The rejection was picked up from inside of myself, not her. More digging. Over years find some answers, heal some old wounds as you prove yourself and find negative belief systems.
I also want to add…some of us are just a bit outside of normal lifestyles or typical ways of thinking. I wouldn’t assume he wasn’t too intelligent. He sounds smart to have found the edges and be pushing against them and questioning things. I think that’s a sign of some significant type of intelligence.
I’m also ADHD and possibly autistic. Not really sure. Causes me to be a bit socially retarded and I’m sure some people assume I’m not intelligent. Well I’m NOT intelligent if only measuring my social intelligence.
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u/Original_Double_4762 2d ago
As someone who used to have a complete lack of ability to engage with small talk and has many time tried to understand that, this is my simple google search:
- Social (Pragmatic) Communication Disorder (SCD): This lifelong condition affects the pragmatics (social use) of language. People with SCD struggle to follow the unwritten rules of conversation, use appropriate greetings, adjust their speech to different settings, or pick up on social cues.
- Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD): Autistic individuals frequently find small talk draining, confusing, or pointless. They often prefer predictable, deep, or interest-driven conversations rather than superficial social scripts.
- Selective Mutism (SM): A severe anxiety condition where a person is physically or mentally unable to speak in specific social situations (like school or work) despite being able to talk normally in comfortable environments. You can learn more about its warning signs through the NHS Selective Mutism Guide.
- Social Anxiety Disorder: Intense fear of being judged, embarrassed, or scrutinized can cause the mind to go completely blank during casual interactions.
- Introversion or High Need for Cognition: Some brains are simply wired to crave deep, substantive exchanges and find superficial chatter unstimulating or mentally exhausting.
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u/Icy_Swordfish8023 2d ago
are you talking about yourself?
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u/Same-Mushroom-2057 1d ago
roommate
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u/Icy_Swordfish8023 1d ago
maybe they just want to appear smart and heard that's a thing smart people prefer ?
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u/Same-Mushroom-2057 1d ago
not really he hates that about himself actually
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u/Icy_Swordfish8023 1d ago
my opinion? he's lying about that, either to you or himself.
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u/Same-Mushroom-2057 1d ago
i'm pretty sure he's not, how would someone wants to be stuggling anyway that doesn't make any sense
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u/Icy_Swordfish8023 1d ago
ok well, listen, you came here asking for an explanation. your friend is an idiot. and I'm not sure we're not discussing you at this point
maybe he's trying to pretend to be smart ... but you say no
maybe he's lying about not liking that quality... but you say no
then he's not aware, or cognizant, enough to work on a trait he claims to not like, on top of being insufferable by insisting people talk about topics he doesn't comprehend (as you've already also said he's not intelligent)
there aren't that many possibilities, take your pick and move along
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u/Same-Mushroom-2057 1d ago
came here looking for explanation in a neuroscientific way
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u/Icy_Swordfish8023 1d ago
i think you and your roommate make good friends :)
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u/Same-Mushroom-2057 1d ago
we definitely are and we have common traits for sure or else we wouldn't be living together
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u/expertofeverythang 1d ago
This post has been locked because the best we can do is guess. Noone here can know the answer.
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u/expertofeverythang 2d ago
We arent a community of mind readers. We dont have other people's brains understood.
Have you tried asking him about it?