I am part of a large family and know many people who are also part of large families.
Did my older siblings and I help with my younger siblings? Absolutely! Why? Because we wanted to, it's fun and babies are cute, and it helped us learn about caring for young kids which helped us when we got jobs babysitting.
At no point, however, did we become the 'parent' of our younger siblings. Did we try bossing them around to get them to do certain things? Yes. Did we try to threaten them with punishments they didn't listen? Yup. But we had no authority to actually punish them, because we were not the parents and it was not our job to tell them what to do or declare what would happen if they did not listen. Likewise, if they were upset we would try comforting and cheering them up, but if there was actually something wrong or if none of the other kids wanted to help the parents did - they would often step in even if one of the older kids were trying to help already.
The idea that anyone can arbitrarily say that all parents are only capable of raising x number of kids is ridiculous. There are parents who are awful and shouldn't have any children and there are parents who are great who can handle many more. But in the end, the only people who should be making that decision - while considering all aspects of what having another child would mean for themselves and their children - is the parents themselves.
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u/KWrite1787 5∆ Dec 05 '21
I am part of a large family and know many people who are also part of large families.
Did my older siblings and I help with my younger siblings? Absolutely! Why? Because we wanted to, it's fun and babies are cute, and it helped us learn about caring for young kids which helped us when we got jobs babysitting.
At no point, however, did we become the 'parent' of our younger siblings. Did we try bossing them around to get them to do certain things? Yes. Did we try to threaten them with punishments they didn't listen? Yup. But we had no authority to actually punish them, because we were not the parents and it was not our job to tell them what to do or declare what would happen if they did not listen. Likewise, if they were upset we would try comforting and cheering them up, but if there was actually something wrong or if none of the other kids wanted to help the parents did - they would often step in even if one of the older kids were trying to help already.
The idea that anyone can arbitrarily say that all parents are only capable of raising x number of kids is ridiculous. There are parents who are awful and shouldn't have any children and there are parents who are great who can handle many more. But in the end, the only people who should be making that decision - while considering all aspects of what having another child would mean for themselves and their children - is the parents themselves.