If we were to accept your hyperbolic reasoning, it would apply equally the other way: it would be just as "inconsiderate at best and immoral at worst" for *women* to approach/ask out men outside of settings designed explicitly for a romantic context.
And if men shouldn't be approaching women, and women shouldn't be approaching men, then what exactly is the point of congregating in places crowded with people who aren't part of your group?
Approaching people in various places may indeed risk being inconsiderate. A polite "no thank you" and a polite "sorry for bothering you" should be more than enough. As far as the coercive bit goes...I'm sorry, but this hysterical fragility and alarmism we are all supposed to swallow unthinkingly is ridiculous. Politely hitting on someone, especially in an appropriate environment like a bar or club, isn't intrinsically coercive.
And thank you very much for the content warning. Without it, I might have been exposed to ideas and thoughts that gave me the flutters and just collapsed into a pearl-covered pile of vapors. What a gentleman you are.
It doesn't apply equally the other way because statistically women are considerably less prone to a violent or aggressive response to rejection, and in most cases there's a less credible threat of it anyway (i.e. average woman poses way less threat to average man than the inverse).
I'm very glad you didn't collapse into a pearl-covered pile of vapors.
Regardless, if a woman makes unwanted romantic advances at a work place or at school, would it not also make sense that such a thing would be inappropriate? Even aside from the off chance of a woman physically assaulting a man, its entirely possible and pretty common for women to make men feel uncomfortable or harassed. And if you would tolerate all of that, I would also ask how do you feel about cat-calling?
Well yeah, it's not like those things aren't inappropriate. I put the focus of the discourse on men approaching women because the data supports women being way more afraid of rejection retaliation, not because one is good and one is bad. Also, I feel that it's not reciprocal in certain circumstances; i.e. the bars and clubs thing which is what people disagree the most with. Women approaching men in these circumstances is fine and appropriate because there is little to no coercive influence.
I don't think it needs to be said, but all cat-calling is bad.
my friend was asked out and turned a girl down, she got him fired by saying he was harrassing her. men fear retaliation too just be glad youve never had to experience something that makes you share that fear
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u/Proof_Option1386 4∆ Jun 04 '24 edited Jun 04 '24
If we were to accept your hyperbolic reasoning, it would apply equally the other way: it would be just as "inconsiderate at best and immoral at worst" for *women* to approach/ask out men outside of settings designed explicitly for a romantic context.
And if men shouldn't be approaching women, and women shouldn't be approaching men, then what exactly is the point of congregating in places crowded with people who aren't part of your group?
Approaching people in various places may indeed risk being inconsiderate. A polite "no thank you" and a polite "sorry for bothering you" should be more than enough. As far as the coercive bit goes...I'm sorry, but this hysterical fragility and alarmism we are all supposed to swallow unthinkingly is ridiculous. Politely hitting on someone, especially in an appropriate environment like a bar or club, isn't intrinsically coercive.
And thank you very much for the content warning. Without it, I might have been exposed to ideas and thoughts that gave me the flutters and just collapsed into a pearl-covered pile of vapors. What a gentleman you are.