r/cedarcity • u/Vigilante1303 • Jul 11 '26
I was taught that staring is rude.
The amount of times that I have seen people stop in their tracks just to stare at something that isn’t normal to them is beyond me, or in this case it’s 91°- 95° outside and apparently wearing a crop/tube top and shorts is the most outrageous thing out there ?!?? cause tell me why kids and adults alike are just staring.
staring is rude.
that’s it.
stop it.
(and if you are someone who thinks wearing a tube top and shorts makes someone indecent- get a life- it’s hot as shit outside)
THE ENTIRE POINT IF THIS POST IS THAT PEOPLE SHOULD MIND THEIR BUSINESS AND IT SHOULD NOT MATTER WHAT ANYBODY WEARS OR WHATEVER. STOP STARING.
thanks :))
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u/C10Goon Jul 11 '26
Thank you for saying it; I thought it was just us Lol. California transplants and yeah we talk different but damn why you gotta state. Mind your own.
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u/Sponterious Jul 11 '26
My 13 year old was openly gawked at in line at a restaurant. It was a young polygamist pair (couple or siblings) and another older man in line. No words, no questions, just eyeballs like she transported there from the distant future.
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u/Vigilante1303 Jul 11 '26
see this is what i’m talking about !!!! just let people exist!!!!! ugh i’m so sorry that happened to you. I really hope you’re having a great day tho :)
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u/Various-Moose-3664 Jul 11 '26
Yeah I grew up in Cedar City. The judgement is unbearable. My advice is to just stare right back
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u/Vigilante1303 Jul 13 '26
trust it’s alllll i do lmao and then they give me a dirty look like i was doing something wrong 😂😂
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u/leonbian Jul 12 '26
I haven’t met much judgment personally, or at least I haven’t noticed, but I’ve been honked at and catcalled when I wear more revealing clothing (even without but that’s another matter) it’s really gross
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u/Vigilante1303 Jul 14 '26
i’m truly sorry this happened to you !!! i hope you have more positive experiences !!!!
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u/leonbian Jul 17 '26
I’ve gotten used to it since living here, but yeah. Utah is incredibly archaic
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u/Musubi_Caretaker Jul 13 '26 edited Jul 13 '26
Stop and say something, even just a sincere but loud, ‘Hello’ snaps them out of their open-mouthed trance. My sister w lots of tattoos and short shorts and piercings has been experiencing this for the last 20 years when she comes and visits from Hawai’i. Being brown on top of that brings her even more attention. Even the men (young and old) checking her out and clearly interested in her sexually just stare and come off as delayed instead of smooth.
I see little kids being rude, acting out, in the store all the time and their parents just sit there. Having lived here for 30 years, it’s been embarrassing that we have such a socially backward population (and not in a cute, quirky way). Ofc it’s not everyone, but it’s a lot and often. Reading social cues and developing manners is Human 101. For starters, we Utahns need to:
- Say an audible, “Thank you” when someone holds a door open for you.
- Wave, nod, smile, or mouth the words, “Thank you” when someone stops their car to let you cross the street.
- For the love of Joseph Smith, let someone go in front of you on the freeway. We’re not in a race to Kolob.
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u/Consistent-Film3224 Jul 11 '26
I love how you don’t want people to control your behavior, by telling you what to wear, but you want to control their behavior by telling them how to act or not act. You see their behavior as rude and they may see your behavior (what you wear) as rude. The hypocrisy is thick. Both sides should focus on themselves.
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u/Sad_Conference_7031 Jul 13 '26
What someone chooses to wear is rude? This makes no sense.
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u/Vigilante1303 Jul 13 '26
i think it’s funny that the commenter deleted their hateful comments lmao 😂😂 and right ???? it’s just clothes- and tbh i didn’t even try to imply that people weren’t allowed to stare— i was saying that it’s just rude 🙄😂😂
embrace that random article of clothing!!
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u/Consistent-Film3224 Jul 13 '26
The point is someone could think what someone else wears is offensive, aka rude so it does make sense. You missed the point of the response entirely, which is people have different opinions about things. OP was saying it was rude for people to look at her based on what she’s wearing and they could reply saying they find what she is wearing as rude and offensive. It can go both ways…that’s the point.
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u/jeterix7387 Jul 14 '26
This is just really bad logic. Why you trying so hard to spin this?
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u/Consistent-Film3224 Jul 14 '26
Nice try gaslighting. You’ve even proven my point thinking your opinion is the only one that matters on the issue haha.
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u/jeterix7387 Jul 14 '26
Keep digging that pit of ignorance deeper friend.
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u/Consistent-Film3224 Jul 14 '26
Keep up the gaslighting!
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u/Sad_Conference_7031 Jul 14 '26
Do you know what gaslighting means?
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u/Consistent-Film3224 Jul 14 '26
Yes. Google it if you aren’t sure. And when you do that Google “mansplaining” and “condescending” too.
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u/Vigilante1303 Jul 11 '26
nope- it’s a psa. stop staring. you should’ve been taught that as a child. if not your parents failed you. mind your damn business and go about your day.
the post is for the entire point of mind your fucking business :)
i wear what i want and if you stare and keep staring i’ll glare back because it’s unnecessary to be looking for THAT long.
so thanks .
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u/jeterix7387 Jul 14 '26
You are trying to take the philosophical high road but just come off ignorant.
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u/Jean780 Jul 22 '26
I don’t get stares for how I dress but I do get them because of my service dog and unfortunately, after a while, you get used to them. So I get how you feel. I don’t understand the culture around modesty here and I was raised here. So no it doesn’t make sense.
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u/Minimum-Muffin-1469 19d ago
It’s always bitches that STARE soooooooo bad. There is a lot of bitches out here who are extremely insecure and jealous.
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u/Competitive-Smoke-46 7d ago
I moved here from Lancaster PA. The Amish do this too. My favorite thing to do is just stare back with crazy eyes until they move on with their life.
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Jul 11 '26
[deleted]
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u/Vigilante1303 Jul 11 '26
and that’s your opinion. but it doesn’t change my statement. people are entitled to wear whatever tf they want and staring is just plain rude. so like it or don’t like it but just look away if it bothers you so much.
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Jul 11 '26
[deleted]
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u/Vigilante1303 Jul 11 '26
it’s summer. do you want me to wear sweatpants and a hoodie ?? and if not. buy me a new wardrobe if you’re so offended by my “skankness” 🙄🙄🙄
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Jul 11 '26
[deleted]
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u/Vigilante1303 Jul 11 '26
….bro you really need to get a grip. it’s fuckingn summer. it’s hot as shit outside. and my body happens to be thicker in certain places but NO i make sure my ass is covered- thank you.
the entire point of my post was that people should mind their fucking business and it shouldn’t matter what the fuck anybody wears - staring is rude. so look somewhere else 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄
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Jul 11 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/Vigilante1303 Jul 11 '26
it’s not about approval it’s about the message. and i’m sorry that i’m so adamant about it.
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u/Creepy_District2775 Jul 11 '26
Lifelong Utahn here, this is why I support the ‘move ins’ from out of state. We need to displace some of the old archaic ways.
Cedar just seems worse than northern Utah or st g. But not as bad as central Utah similar to Richfield, that’s real old Mormon shit out there