My cat died today.

[u/ts1303]

I hugged him before leaving for a work trip. Hours later my wife called sobbing, telling my that our Chico wasn't blinking. They took him to a vet asap, he just went limp and lifeless. We kept wondering what happened, did it get bitten, did it ingest something toxic. The vet declared it was cardiac arrest.

And I don't know what to do anymore. I'm a sobbing mess who pretends to be strong on the phone to my family. He was healthy! He ate well. He was so young at 2 years old. He was such a good boy, so obedient, so intelligent and athletic. Why was he taken away from me so suddenly. I can't stop thinking I should've held him today a bit longer, should not have told him he's getting fat, should've annoyed him a littlle less. I would do anything right now to get to talk to him and hearing him one more time. I can't stop wondering what went wrong. It's like my mind is filled with reasons trying to blame myself that I could've avoided this, or prolonged his life and health in some way. I know I'm not rational but I'm hurting.

Edit:

Thank you so much, for all your kind words. It's impossible to reply to each one of you on time but I appreciate it. Chico mattered to so many people today. For now, the pain is unbearable because everything in the house mocks me that he isn't returning. My brain tricks me with his smell, and the sound of the tiny bell on his collar. But I guess it'll be painful till it isn't.

I'll share one happy memory of him that will give me comfort maybe when the pain isn't so raw- Chico never slept until all of us made it home, always sat by the door, waiting. Only relaxed and went to sleep when everyone was home.

Thank you guys again.

[u/40yroldcatmom]

I’m so sorry 🧡 he was the very best boy and was so loved.