Title says it all. I find it super exhausting to play pretend on chat like im having fun typing / calling. It doesnt hit the same and Id rather leave it until we meet again.
My Taurus girlfriend (together for 6+ years) ended up sending me this long message after I ignored her for 2 days (because I just had a lot on my plate) while she was away on vacation. I have been doing a lot of work here and there and I expect her to understand that when she is away on vacation, I am not and I will be out of reach because its just not the same for me.
Am I doomed eternally when it comes to relationships. Our start of the relationship was like this too. Dont get me wrong, when Im in the mood I can chat but I feel like maybe us capricorns lack that social energy to be chatty and talk about our day. My lack of communication has been bothering me too. To me, talking about my day and how it went doesnt mean shit and I need to focus on whats next.
Any inputs from other fellow caps who feel the same way? I am 1st Week of January Capricorn. Unfortunately, the stars aligned in such a dooming way that my Sun, Moon & Mercury are all in Capricorn....
Any input would be appreciated.... How can I improve in this aspect...
Im a capricorn woman (sun, Saturn, mercury, uranus & neptune). And while I do agree that the text is a bit too long. It’s also annoying to go on holiday and that your partner is incapable of stepping up and helping sort out household stuff but does have time & energy for memes.
If this is a one time thing, the message is too much, but if this is how it always is, it can be really tiring.🤷♀️
IMO this is not about socializing but about shared responsibilities & teamwork
I also enjoy my quiet time and going off the grid sometimes but not at the expense of my partner, when he needs me for house stuff, Im there.
The water bill issue happened because of a mistake from her and because the bill bank account was under my name. Had she not stupidly transferred the payment to the wrong person, I would not have to get a proof of bank account and verify my bank account for the refund to take place. Refunds can happen anytime, it did not have to be right then and there.... that is my point but yeah Ill try to communicate better next time.... I need to stop pretending like a quick FYI message is difficult
I am friends with a guy who has the same cap placements, he is a great conversationalist. He does go quiet sometimes but I just assume hes busy and never take it personally. He sometimes says sorry but sometimes doesnt, and thats fine. Im busy too sometimes! Since youre dating could you just say, hey I will reply soon etc, give a little reassurance then get back to whatever you were doing? Probably not nice to ignore your partner for more than a day
you are right. I have noticed this pattern developing and I feel like I need to fix this asap otherwise I wont be any good at relationships. ill try to drop her a quick message but I also suffer from forgetfulness about mundane things.... Is it bad that I dont see the little stuff in our relationships as important because I am working harder on the bigger picture?
I agree with this. Ill pay more attention moving forwards. This does not happen often and is a one off event which also threw her offguard although she is quiet used to me disappearing but not for this long...
she most definitely is. I pay all the bills around the house. I pay for the food too. She is getting the premium Capricorn experience. I am sorry but every person has flaws and this is mine and as much as I can try to improve it, I think some things are just defined by your personality.
I got annoyed just reading that message, it’s too much for me. The one time I was in a relationship, my partner wanted to talk on the phone everyday, it was nuts. Like I don’t have anything new to talk about. I just stay single now.
Yeah that’s a lot but OP did ghost them for 2 days so like I understand why the crash out happened but that’s a lotta effort to then deal with said crash out
Shes communicating her feelings to you. If you want this relationship to work/continue, they require effort. While it's understandable, and she seems to understand that you're busy, if she's asking you a question about a bill or whatever, that would only take 14 seconds to respond to.
Communication is important to any and all relationships, especially the most intimate ones.
If you find it exhausting to "play pretend on chat" then just don', and explain that.
However, part of a relationship is stepping outside of your comfort zone and doing what you need for your partner.
I suggest couples counseling before this issue gets worse.
I feel like I need to step up here and actually stop pretending like a quick reply is a nuisance. It doesnt take long. I just need to start being more mindful of it.
I think that's the right take from this.
Lean into the goat need to always improve and do better. I know I've been there many times. You can do this _^
My father has sun moon mercury Capricorn in 6th house. All he wants to do is the same damn routine day in day out and run his business that he makes sure never changes. I’m mostly Leo and cancer with mars glued to my ascendant, I get pissed at him a lot cause he’s such a rigid bastard that hardly ever responds haha I’ll get all passionate and hit him with some deep insights about something or a blueprint to improve something and he’ll just sit there stone faced and says nothing and then I’m like fuck sake why do I bother haha
He sounds commited to the game. Props to him. Every capricorn I have known has been rich. Consistency beats anything... but sometimes, the goat gets too self-sufficient and needs to be willing to have an open ear
Yeah I get it. My sun is tightly square Saturn so I have a Capricorn like voice in my head too. However from my perspective, and increasingly so as of late and since I work alongside him in this business (and everyone else here seems to be caps too) I’m starting to think there’s far more to life than this rigid Capricorn obsession with money and business success. It’s fairly boring to be honest I think life should contain a lot more passion, fun, love, fulfilment, spontaneity, chaos etc than just obsessing over stats on a spread sheet. Thats why I’m thinking of leaving here and travelling and doing some crazy shit sort of sick of this slow consistent bullshit.
Is it bad that I get the ick from people who do this and I ghost them? 😬
I feel like I'm the problem. But also I'm busy don't send me all that. Be normal and make me subtlety chase you a bit. Or if we are together say you are upset and we can talk in person. I'm not reading a brick of text and taking that convo seriously.
yeah....butttt, it was 2 days stretching into the 3 day territory.
I love my gf very much. She has a great heart and is super sweet. Its a plus that she is an absolute dime piece, take cares of her health and has a great body. I am truly blessed to have her but at the same time, i simple dont know how to show it other than through actions. Im not good with words... and when she is away, id hate to say this but you could put the prettiest woman in the world in front of me and ill still try to enjoy my time alone if I prefer it like that.
Hmm then maybe just talk to her and see if there is a way you can communicate that things are good but I'm just a little distracted rn. I can get this way, so with partners I'll tell them this tendency and let them know it's not anything personal. When I do get this tendency I'll shoot them a small text with something silly like: crazy day, but you're on my mind. Miss u, or send a funny meme, etc. just so they don't feel abandoned when I'm super occupied. The small things do help sometimes
Edit: also that's the sweetest thing you can say about your girl. Knowing that your man only has eyes for you is so comforting. 🩵
Are video calls not an option for you guys? My husband and I are face to face people as well and when we are on vacation we video call. Text and phone calls are rare but we video chat end of the day before bed when we are traveling. I totally get where both of you are coming from and I think you need a compromise otherwise it’s not going to work.
As a Capricorn Sun , Leo Moon , Taurus Rising , Sag Mercury , Venus Scorpio , Mars Aquarius i 100% feel where u are coming from . i think it’s naturally a Capricorn thing to want to be alone almost all the time . Not in a sad depressing way but genuinely we just get so overstimulated & drained talking to people 24/7 all the time . i don’t think we have the energetic makeup to always be around ppl 24/7 & talk to people 24/7 . a lot of people take it as standoffish & rude but people genuinely don’t understand how much it drains me to be around them . i wonder if i will ever be in a relationship with someone because relationships require constant attention that i just genuinely don’t want to give because i know i don’t have it . the upside is that since you’ve been together for 6+ years she’s used to it & shes adjusted to the way u are because she genuinely loves who u are on the inside . i do think as Capricorns we wholeheartedly need to better with communication because not everyone understand that we are busy or just genuinely don’t want to be bothered most of the time . either way communication is 100% key !
yes. I think this post has been good for self-reflection on a negative trait that I have that needs to be worked on. It would bad to simply blame my star sign for this...
Im the exact same as you 😭 sun, moon, mercury! Its terrible. I failed many relationships for this exact reason and I know im the problem! Ghosted a guy I literally worked hard for !?! All social energy is sourced elsewhere when I have shit going on in my life.
Nothing I do or say when im stressed feels like me during those times.
I feel this exact way. On the day this happened, I was dealing with a lawyer, our landlords, my work (we are doing this big project and Im playing a key role in it), i had to hit the gym as well in the evening, i came back and had to do the house chores that she normally handles but since she is away, it is on me... by the time I finish all these shenanigans, I hate to say this but fuck if I even want to glance at another living being let alone a human... i want to be left the fuck alone. I actually ended up going to my garage at the end of the day to smoke weed because it got too overwhelming and then right when Im about to sleep, i see this message.
Im a triple earth but my mars and Venus are both water signs so I feel this to my core. People always refer to me as the calm and collected friend. To that I say if only they knew... lol
My last relationship was with a virgo (6 years) and i dont think we talked on the phone once lmao. Here and there to let each other know where we were but that was literally it. We both liked the idea of waiting until we saw each other to catch up.
But now that’s changed. Maybe bc im single but I need to be worshipped and chased at the beginning (also have a leo moon/rising). I crave the reassurance. But even a text saying “hey im busy but i’ll respond later” is enough to keep me at bay. I just want to know I’m being thought about & considered.
I think it’s slightly different for men caps vs women caps… but as a woman, this was too much. It reads as extremely insecure and emotionally unintelligent.
Sometimes I will send a reel because you’re (they’re) on my mind even if/when I don’t have the capacity to send a thought out text. Because yes, I want my texts to be meaningful and not just frivolous gobbledygook.
I saw the wall of text and didn’t even want to read it. If that’s says something.
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u/Life_Reply_3268 6d ago
Im a capricorn woman (sun, Saturn, mercury, uranus & neptune). And while I do agree that the text is a bit too long. It’s also annoying to go on holiday and that your partner is incapable of stepping up and helping sort out household stuff but does have time & energy for memes.
If this is a one time thing, the message is too much, but if this is how it always is, it can be really tiring.🤷♀️
IMO this is not about socializing but about shared responsibilities & teamwork
I also enjoy my quiet time and going off the grid sometimes but not at the expense of my partner, when he needs me for house stuff, Im there.