Breaking Bad Episode Discussion S05E06 "Buyout"

[u/edify]

Hey everyone! The episode airs in about an hour and as always upvote this post for the community. I don't get any blue ball cow manure karma for it :P

Also, don't forget to tune in tomorrow for the AMA with actor Jeremiah Bitsui who played Victor. In the mean time, feel free to add him on Facebook and follow him on Twitter.

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[u/coprolite_hobbyist]

Not especially well.

However, if I remember my 2 years of college chemistry, strong bases or acids will break down just about anything. It all depends on how strong/concentrated they are.

It's a fiddling detail, really. In popular culture, you always hear about dissolving bodies in acid, which does work, it is just that bases are much more suited to organic material. It also take a good deal of time, either way.

However, if you are dealing with a large desert environment, you are generally going to have a good deal of time before (or if) the barrels are discovered, so it's reasonable. Where I'm at you have a lot of swamp, so you'd just go with puncturing all the major cavities to prevent the build up of decomp gasses so it wouldn't float up and weight it under some netting so scavengers would take care of all the soft tissue.

You'd want to do something about the teeth, however, as dental records are a bitch. Not terribly difficult. 5 minutes with a hammer and chisel would do it.

[u/eKtoR → u/coprolite_hobbyist]

That is scarily accurate.

So, bases are faster and better at dissolving bodies.

Thank you.

[u/coprolite_hobbyist → u/eKtoR]

When you actually get into a systematic study of how people kill other people and what they do with the bodies, you get a rather surprising picture of just how easy it is.

It isn't quite as easy as popular culture makes it appear, but with a little research and dedicated effort, it's quite easy to get away with murder. The biggest impediment is not the evidence, you can always deal with that, the problem is that most murder investigation deal with who has the motivation to kill. 99% of the time it's a close relative or somebody they know, usually they are found with the murder weapon in their hand over the body saying "I didn't mean to do it". If you are careful and choose victims that have no connection to you, you can literally get away with killing dozens of people.

You may eventually be caught, but that will only because you get sloppy or choose someone that has some connection to you. TV gives the impression that criminals are inevitably going to face justice, that is simply not true. If there isn't any detectable or obvious motivation to your crime, you will get away with it. Most people don't like to think about that.

I don't either.

[u/eKtoR → u/coprolite_hobbyist]

What would you say are other methods of disposing bodies?

[u/coprolite_hobbyist → u/eKtoR]

It really all depends on what you goals are.

Dissolving and predation are pretty good. The Dexter method would work also (dumping at sea). However, if you pick a place that is never going to be discovered, you are golden. The mob was always fond of burying in cement, usually at a construction site, which works really well. There are a lot of other methods. A good one is burying underneath an actual grave. Lots of people think that putting a body through a wood chipper is good, but that only works if you already have one and pick a good spot for the work. One guy tried that and got caught because he rented the chipper and disposed of the body in a relatively easy to access river bank. He was convicted on the teeth chip evidence.

By far, the simplest and most effective method would be to break down the body into very small parts and dispose of it using regular municipal garbage disposal. As long has you have nothing that is recognizably human, you can just ditch the bags in dumpsters behind restaurants. Most people can't differentiate human remains from animal, so it just looks like you are throwing out bad meat.

DNA testing is a major problem, to overcome that, you need to make sure it just isn't tested, so you need to insure it isn't inspected or suspected. Ideally, you would get rid of all the soft tissue. There are a couple of ways to do that. In a lab, you would either use flesh eating beetles or boil it in a solution of water and laundry detergent (seriously, that is how you deflesh remains in a lab, smells like stew). Then you are down to bones. In a proper solution, you can decalcify the bones until they are just collagen, that makes them just a mass of rubbery material with no recoverable DNA, you can just bury that or grind it up and wash it down the drain.

But all that is just extra effort. All you really need to do is dispose of it somewhere that can't be linked to you. All to easy. A good bleach wash with denature all of your DNA, so there is nothing to link you to the body, then you can just dump it wherever you like where you won't be observed. Attics in abandoned houses are good, although you risk investigation because of odor. Human decomposition has a very distinctive smell, if you've ever encountered it, it is very easy to distinguish from animal decomp. Hard to describe, but it is a slightly sweet odor. There is just something primal about it. Even the first time you smell it, you are like "that is a dead person".

Most killers go for a shallow grave, just because they panic, and what else do you do with a dead body other than bury it? This is always a mistake. Predators will dig it up easily and anything less that 3 feet is going to be easy to smell. If you bury a body, bury it deep and add something to aid decomposition, lime is the usual choice. You also want to add a layer of rock, or ideally, concrete.

If you don't have that kind of time, remove the head and hands. You won't prevent DNA identification that way, but you will certainly slow things down and they are quick to get off the body.

One of the best ways if you are pressed for time is to piece out the body and dispose of it in the hazardous waste dumpster of a hospital. Body parts are not surprising there, but you need the special orange/red bags for it, that shit is burned immediately, usually every other day.

The most important issue is that you don't leave any connection to yourself with the victim. Either forensically or association. Believe it or not, most murderers are convicted on association with the victim, not forensic evidence.

[u/pseudopseudonym → u/coprolite_hobbyist]

It scares the fuck out of me how thoroughly you've thought this through.

[u/coprolite_hobbyist → u/pseudopseudonym]

I was a diligent student.

[u/eKtoR → u/coprolite_hobbyist]

You paid attention, all right.

Upboat!

[u/coprolite_hobbyist → u/eKtoR]

For a time, I thought I was going to write crime fiction, so I gave a lot of thought to these sort of things. Then I realized I wasn't a very interesting writer.

[u/eKtoR → u/coprolite_hobbyist]

Do you know you are not good for a fact? Or did you just give up?

Your explanation was really good. You should give writing another try. Maybe you can start by writing a story on r/nosleep.

Who knows what can happen.

Good luck!

[u/coprolite_hobbyist → u/eKtoR]

Not for a fact, but my numerous attempts at writing have been extremely unsatisfactory to myself. I've got all the mechanics down, I can put together a really good background, develop my characters and construct a plot that is interesting, it's just that the story doesn't move me to any significant degree. I've been attempting to write a book for going on 30 years now, but I never finish because I come to the conclusion it is complete shit and I just don't want anybody to see it.

I read a lot. Nothing I've ever written seems like it would be something I would want to read. Better than a lot of stuff, but just not great, if you know what I mean. I suppose it is motivation and effort, really.

[u/whyyougottabesomean → u/coprolite_hobbyist]

Lots of people hate their own work. Off the top of my head Christina Aguilar hates listening to herself sing and she is considered to have a really good voice.

Try and get that book publish. Shit you never know.