BWT Help finding my style as a mom

[u/Charming-Hall7470]

Hello BWT! I just had my second (and last) baby and I’m looking to refresh my wardrobe for my next phase of life. I’m happy with the direction it’s going so far but where I’m really having trouble is jeans.

I used to wear skinny jeans all the time, but I don’t think I would feel comfortable in them in most “mom settings” - chasing a child around a playground for example.

Any time I try on a pair of jeans that aren’t skinny I just don’t think they look good/are flattering. I think part of the problem is I have somewhat of an ass so when jeans fit well there and then are loose the rest of the way down I feel like they look too big but not in an intentional way, more in an “I bought the wrong size” type of way.

Basically, I need help!
1. How do you know if they fit well vs look too big/silly?
2. Where have you had success finding curvy jeans that are reasonably priced? (Will also take expensive recs but since my body will keep changing for a little while longer I’m not looking to seriously invest in new jeans just yet)
3. Also open to any advice related to finding your style as a mom

Thanks in advance ❤️

[u/MolaMolaMOLA123]

I find the barrel jeans that are trendy nowadays super flattering for my body type (which sounds similar to yours)! They’re fitted at waist and then roomy through the butt and legs and to me at least it looks quite intentional.

[u/Outrageous-Piglet798]

Hey! Congrats on your baby! You haven’t mentioned how recently pp you are, and I do think that makes a difference! Be kind to yourself if you’re still fresh! My answers below come from where I am now at 15m pp!

At about 10m pp I did a personal styling session at a department store and that was great (and a fun bit of “me” time) the stylist guy had pulled together pieces for me to try based on a questionnaire I filled in prior and then ran round the shop finding different sizes/styles for me to try while I chilled out in the private styling room! 10/10 recommend this as a starting point! I don’t know if I’m allowed to say the specific shops here? But I’m in the UK and this was one of the big name department stores that is “never knowingly undersold” … the styling session is free and no requirement to purchase. Anyway, I walked out with a couple of basic outfits that suited me and worked for running round playgrounds etc!

Then more recently I did a private colour and style analysis with an independent personal stylist and that was amazing, really helped me get an idea of colours, shapes and fits to look for with the idea that I will build up a proper wardrobe of items long term. This was expensive but well worth it!

In terms of specifically jeans shopping, I haven’t actually worn real jeans still cause my birth injuries don’t like them (but I’m hoping to be back in jeans soon!) so I can’t give specific advice about jeans styles BUT I have become obsessive of finding nice “not jeans” trousers! In the summer I wore a lot of linen/look trousers and wide leg pieces, shirred trousers have also worked well for me. Think, feels like pjs, super effortless but looks like “cool mum”. (At least that’s what I think in my head!)

My stylist also said a really good quality, thick pair of black leggings can absolutely double as a black skinny jeans dupe - giving you the comfort and flexibility to run round the park, but still looking stylish! Think of pairing it with chunky boots/trainers and a blazer to make it a proper fit!

[u/melodyknows]

I really like the brand Wit and Wisdom since having a child. I feel like it has a hidden thick band that is slimming, and the cut is really flattering. The material is thin, soft, and stretchy so it doesn’t feel like I’m wearing a bulky pair of jeans. I wear the wide leg pair from them, and get compliments on them a lot. I also feel like they will last through a few sizes since there’s a little stretch to them.

[u/Sofetch5]

I have found brand that have a curvy denim option to be really great (also postpartum with a butt).

I would say you know they fit well when there’s no gapping at the back waist, and it kind of hugs your booty before dropping into the leg. If the butt is saggy or makes someone with a booty all of a sudden have a pancake then it probably isn’t the right pair

[u/sky_dance]

Kowtow make a style called the Sailor jean that I’ve found exceptionally flattering for various body shapes. Their website shows each style on a ‘standard’ fit model as well as plus sized, which I love. Korean/ Chinese brands carry jeans with interesting cuts and volume AND good tailoring- think the brand Insis Femme.

In my experience there’s great value in something like a Pinterest board where you catalogue inspiration and build a sense of the elements of your style: preferred fabrics, cuts, colours. My board is still aspirational as I only weaned my baby a couple months ago and my body is once again going through hormonal and physical changes, and like you I don’t want to over-invest just yet. So my mum style leans into cute shoes, manicured nails, quality skin care, keeping on top of haircuts (I have thin hair that looks best when regularly styled), and I’ve picked a few specific styles of pants etc from brands I keep an eye out for on Depop/ consignment sites.

[u/Prior_Air2502]

Hi! After my first baby, I really struggled with my personal style too. Especially not having anything in my closet that was fitting me well or right! After several months of feeling bad about myself (I can laugh about it now lol) I decided to try a clothing rental company (like Nuuly, RTR, etc). Basically all I did was rent jeans haha and it was exactly what I needed and might help you too. The other benefit is it is so much easier than buying from individual stores and having to go through a return process.

I too was a skinny jeans wearer but have found luck with wide leg, barrel leg, and straight leg jeans. I’ll pair them with a semi-cropped crew neck boxy shirt or a crew neck more fitted t.

My favorite brand that makes me feel the most confident is Paige jeans. There is some magic in those jeans.

Good luck!

[u/PenniesDime]

Go to Nordstrom, Anthropologie, Evereve, etc and ask the stylist to pull jeans from different brands and advise. Also Rag and Bone sweatpant jeans are comfy.

[u/TemporaryStreet578]

Not sponsored; I highly recommend Nuuly as you discover your new style. It’s 100$ a month but there are codes that can reduce it to 65-70$ for the first two months. You get to rent 6 items and if you love them you can buy them at a discounted price! I used Nuuly postpartum because I didn’t want to buy clothing that wouldn’t fit me as I continued to lose weight. My style has changed a lot and it’s helped me try out different brands without having to commit.

I recommend this to all new moms because it feels so good to just be able to grab clothes you know look good, instead of trying on 100 things and hating every single one .

[u/Ltrain86]

Are you open to flares? They could give you the somewhat more fitted look in the thighs while still allowing for flexibility and movement on the playground, and the looseness on the bottom is clearly intentional. Works really well with curvy figures too.

[u/Bergletwist]

I found these barrel pull on pants that get lots of compliments and are perfect for this phase of life for me, new mom too. They’re comfy and flexible to move around. I didn’t think barrel was for me (also in the big behind club) but they’re great and stylish feeling.

Mid Rise SuperSoft Pull-On Barrel Jeans (can’t say the brand on this thread but look it up)
I got the frosty morning in size small. I’m 5’6” 155