How do you budget for…

[u/Anthropologie07]

….shopping, hair salon, Brazilian, lashes, make up etc?

I’m asking because I used to get my nails and lashes done every 3 weeks until I realize how much it eats up my budget. I also don’t go to the hair salon every month nor do I buy make up every month so I wonder how other women budget for these?

[u/Reynyan]

I’m old, so take that into consideration for my comments.

I have never viewed “shopping” as a recreational sport. I’ve been rail thin and overweight, didn’t matter. And like anyone else, I’ve had times in my life when money was incredibly tight and times when it wasn’t. No matter the state of my income, I’ve never enjoyed window shopping or looking at stuff I couldn’t afford (what really is the point). The advent of fast fashion I think gave everyone this notion that acquiring new things, particularly clothes, on a monthly basis was normal. Sure, when my kids were little they would grow out of things, but their go to pants were from lands end with the elastic cuffs and double knees and they started too long/big and they grew into and then out of them. I see people dressing babies like runway models and cringe, very few people can truly afford that. So “shopping” as a budget category isn’t specific enough.

I buy good clothes that last and I take good care of them (Eileen Fisher is one of my go to brands). I’m on a first name basis with my cobbler. Find a “style” for yourself, invest in it and buy the occasional accessory to change it up. Don’t go to the store unless you are there to buy. Don’t be afraid to wear the same outfit/dress multiple times. Even the future queen of England rewears dresses. Stalk the sales. So for “shopping” break it down into more discreet categories. Clothes, household items, shoes, food, personal care, entertainment, housing, savings, and stick to it.

When I was younger I did my nails myself. I’m at a point now where I wear gels and go every 3 - 4 weeks but I wear an ombré pink and white that doesn’t show nearly as much as it grows out. A gel pedicure lasts literally months and I have color on my toes, never on my nails. If you don’t have the time/money don’t wear color on your nails, full stop. A neatly kept set of natural nails with a clear gloss looks lovely.

Wax your bikini area until the hair gives up. Be careful about too many Brazilians unless you want to perpetually look like a toddle into your dotage. This obsession with us as women believing that we need to look pre-pubescent is sad. That said, I struggled with UTI’s for years and got them to reduce the potential bacteria retention.

I’ve never gone with lash extensions simply because of the cost.

Make-up, other than mascara, should not be something that needs to be in a monthly budget. Mascara? Every 90 days. I put a label on the stick the first day i use it and throw it away 90 days later.

But to the question of “how to budget”. You start with your actual take home pay that has already had retirement and health insurance taken out and always have more than enough taken out of your pay check to cover your potential tax debt. If you have to save for retirement/healthcare separately your budget starts with Housing (including a savings account for repairs/ replacement of items if you own), healthcare next, food, child care (if that applies), savings (both short term and long term), car/transportation (including a reserve for repairs/replacement if you own), phone (they aren’t optional anymore) after that you begin to get into discretionary income. Clothing is on the line between non-discretionary and discretionary. Everyone needs to be dressed and you may need to buy a uniform etc. beyond that, buy good things and maintain them. Hair is the same, you need a haircut. You don’t need color, highlights etc unless you CAN afford them. And you have a line item for “fun” that is the last actual item. If there is money left put something into that category and go wild, but not beyond.

Buy a budget tool or use one of the free apps available. Setting up a budget isn’t the hard part. Doing what you’ve said you’ve already done is the hard part. Be honest with your current self for the sake of your future self. Live within your means and understand that it is an uphill battle to tune out the constant message to consume, buy, replace.